On Love - Blog Posts

I am the hungry beast waiting outside your window, I'll chew off my own leg before I admit I'm starved though

Mitski Abbey // Daniel M. Lavery How To Respond To Criticism // Caroal Lee To Die For // Liv Ullmann Changing // Ethel Cain Strangers //Orson Scott Card // Mitski Shame // Pat the Bunny I'm not a good person // Mitski Humpty // Maggie Nelson Bluets // Charles Bukowski Ham on Rye // Sylvia Plath the unabridged journals of sylvia plath // Jenna Barton

not to me. not if it’s you.

― Anne Carson (Euripides), Dead Poets Society (Final Script), Extraordinary Attorney Woo (Ep. 10), Anne Carson (H of H Playbook)

night and day by virginia woolf // from the collected Works; "dracula” by bram stoker // woman hollering creek and other stories by sandra cisneros // art by holly warburton // this is how you lose the time war by amal el-mohtar // lighthousekeeping by jeanette winterson // everything everywhere all at once (2022) // quote by margaret atwood

hey sweet pea, can we have a complication of poems/excerpts that make you fall in love with love and all mushy and gooey inside?

casey reiland my boss informs me that moose are dying \\ james baldwin if beale street could talk (via @morepeachyogurt) \\ virginia woolf the years (via @weltenwellen) \\ keaton st. james rural boys watch the apocalypse \\ sayaka saeki bloom into you \\ james baldwin giovanni's room \\ peter gizzi lines depicting simple happiness (via @typewriter-worries) \\ @typewriter-worries \\ lizzie cernik how we met: 'it's like waking up to sunlight every day. i yearned for a soulmate - and i've found her' (via @havingrevelations) \\ jules ryan gravecleaner: "bloodwater" (via @springmyth) \\ @nobaracore \\ ladan lakshiri what does love mean? see how 4-8 year-old kids describe love \\ svetlana alexeivich voices from chernobyl (tr. keith gessen) [lyudmila ignatenko speaking about her husband, deceased firefighter vasily ignatenko] (via @papenathys) \\ aimee nezhukumatathil lucky fish: "baked goods" \\ thomas campbell \\ @soracities \\ vladimir nabokov in a letter to his wife véra, jul 8 1926 (via @saintesorciere) \\ anne carson recreation \\ victoria hannan kokomo \\ victoria hannan kokomo

kofi

Miss you, darling. Miss you so much. I hurt you so much when I was hurting, and it was the same from you to me. I hope you're doing well and I hope you don't ever get near me. I'm sorry for resenting you

muse

My muse, my light, my art knows your shades as if it were its own

I will immortalize you in my world, through and through.

With my brushstrokes as sharp as your words, with my colors as bright as your hearts core.

If you ruin me, i will let you.

you wear damaged scars on the tip of your fingertips,

My eyes only regard them for how they fabricate you glow,

Your breath a phantom of the winds soft kiss,

As you break my heart, I will beg you to do it slow.

My lovely muse with the deepest water under the shore,

I will drown, deeper and deeper with a smile till all ends,

As the life falls out of my being onto your ocean floor,

My love knew no limits, i loved as soft as cotton tends.

My ever young light, you live forever in my art

I watch gladly, as you tear me apart.

I am a big fan of platonic expressions of love, as there are very few things that make me feel happier than when I am with my friends. I also like thinking, and so I have put my thoughts into words.

I am easily taken over by the devotion that I feel towards the people I love.

I want to give all of myself to the little family that we’ve made together, the one not sharing the blood that I have, but the one that has come together to be what it is now.

Occasionally I am afraid that they do not see me like this. I feel as though I may come off as too strong at times, and I don’t want them to see me in that light. I want to spend the rest of my life with them because I love them. I love being near them. I love being their family. I love devoting my whole world to them and our future.

Perhaps I am too wishful? I don't want to be. I want this to not be a dream. I want to make it real, and I can with time and hard work. I can carve out a future for us if they will let me.

I cannot let myself fear a future without them by my side, so I put myself in the present, and I see them and I know that they are there and real. I sit there with the little family that I helped create, and I let myself know that fear will not stop me.

I will take the future and make it into another day's present.

I recognize song of achilles when I see it

i miss you more than i remember you

clementine von radics / c. c. aurel / miles johnston / ranata suzuki / clementine von radics / sue zhao / madeline miller / lily thula / salma deera / clementine von radics / shelby eileen / jedaleyjd via pinterest / holly warburton / mary oliver / mitski / sea wolf / nickie zimov / the mountain goats

Gustav Klimt’s ’“The Kiss” (1908) by = 。= (2009)

John Cage to Merce Cunningham, June 29 1943

Quatre nuits d'un rêveur (Robert Bresson, 1971)

some of my favorite tiny love stories

the grief of loving too much is heavy but it is better than the regret of not trying at all

It's december and i miss you yet again

please stop living so far away, I wanna shop my groceries with you

need a love that turns Qais into Majnu and Laila into La ilaaha illalaah

love & friendship - collected writings from side wounds and other poems

___hanfolk

Begging God to fix you!

(And other tales about religious trauma)

Wildflower

-kalika

A Letter to Love -kalika

you're allowed to be held.

"Lover's rage" by Astha Kesri

on spring

pastel sunrise, mottled green

flower bloom, thawed stream

spring is upon us, the air is clean

crisp cloud cuts the sky

and there’s a gleam in your eye

an adventure there, and i want to follow

outstretched hand, t-shirts at dusk

grassy knoll, abandoned park

mosquitos buzz and bat them away

air cool and perfumed with the breeze of the day

and there’s a bed waiting when you get home

and the silence is warm when you’re alone

sky open above you and dizzy with fear

the grip of nostalgia never felt so real

until now, grass flat beneath your back

and sand between toes, pretty rock in backpack

teetering on the precipice of all you have known

at once still so young, at once so near grown

living felt stagnant but the answer was clear

every me nested in me, stacked years upon years

the coming of spring still awakens such thrill

and the promise of budding spreads dreams anew:

this was never a middle, as the pond is never still

but the beginning of everything, and everything that will

the world

entropy must increase,

disorder in your brain

impossible to untangle in music

can’t sense-make nonsense and expect to gain

there’s got to be another way,

there’s a pounding in your head

there’s a solution, thermodynamically

excise the pain, release the dread

but when you stop running

all you hear is your breath

the sear in your lungs

pounding in your chest

stripped away, immortalized

beastly, energized

your face hot against warm water

the body is all that remains, unclothed

a shock to the eye,

stripped of ego, stripped of pride

curve of waist meets slant of thigh

without facade, it’s who you are

truths tantalizing and terrified

feared to face, close your eyes

but its you, you cannot hide,

so open.

see on wide;

the messy marks of an existence cried

unfortunately, agonizingly alive

smeared grease stains on phone screen

and passed a joke from video to friend

statistically significant,

node on the web of connection

sticky fingers push cheek,

mold skin to who you are

physical barriers between us,

but our minds touch, less individual

more undefined,

more unknown

split between the bodies of friends

and everyone i ever met

self-description entailed self-destruction

and a greater whole emerged from the mess

ridiculously vulnerable

a populace in fetal form

the world, it was me and you

the individual a self-serving lie

all born with fragile skin that breaks

all born from the same blue sky

all born vulnerable

to the world, expecting attack from all sides

i ran, and it worked, because entropy increased

but my energy went to another cause

a difficult pill to swallow,

that things don’t disappear when they're gone

the world is a closed system,

and we are who you are

and i fear you

and i love you

and you are me, and i am you

and when i see something i recognize

in the reflection in your eye,

and when i run and try to hide,

we are the world, it’s all around

it’s within me.

to the one --

you’ve been forever a lack,

a hole, an absence

i cannot imagine you,

because i idolize you

i want, so desperately, for you to be

an absence yet constant presence

you lurk, a nagging feeling

an abcess, an itch

and yet i could not seek you out

because a part of me still thinks

we will crash on the street,

or touch hands at the bookstore,

we’ll smile shyly and pass,

gazes will linger

amid flashing lights or buzzing drone,

or elevator music, or raucous home

any way that would seem

like the stars drew our fate

but you can’t argue that from a swipe,

so it scares me, to find you that way

in the pit, the emptiness of my soul

when i should’ve been looking to the ones who fill,

to the excess, to the outpouring

to the ones i know.

you are quiet giggle

confession stuck as it leaves,

weaving through the crowded street

you are late nights texting,

and the last one to put the phone down,

and borrowed shoes for the night or the week,

and fingers gripping my back when we hug

you taught me ‘i love you’ when i leave the car,

and you taught me to face what i truly felt

you taught me it would turn out okay,

and you taught me when to fight back

love is a whole,

tangible and real

i’ll recognize you when i see you

when i know you, it will mean

i was not fixed,

didn’t find my other half

you were never the first,

you will not be the last