Teen Wolf Movie - Blog Posts

Also guys… uh Eli isn’t “the middle letters of Stiles backwards” that’s so obscure, his grandfathers name is literally Elias. Elias, the one who went by “Stiles” first. Eli and Stiles both have the sherif’s father’s name

Look, i was never a sterek shipper but there were some real strong sterek vibes in the movie...

The jeep - like why is Derek so hung up on Stiles' jeep that it's literally the emotional center point of his relationship with his son in the film??

Also Eli looks and dresses so much like Stiles. He's a sterek lovechild

The first point at least had to be intentional right?

Derek having feelings about the Jeep™ specifically is just like when the car went to heaven but the gay angel didn't

Obsessed with how Allison and Scott jump right back into a relationship and COPARENTING A CHILD as if they haven't been apart since they were like 16 and as if Allison herself isn't mentally STILL 16.

Like Scott has had DOUBLE her total life experience. He's graduated from high school, left home, experienced adulthood, had at least two other relationships, and gone through unspeakable traumas including being relentlessly hunted (though I guess they resolved that offscreen?) since she died.

She didn't even get to her senior year! She's missed a LOT. She's just not experienced a LOT. She's basically who she was at 16 and he's THIRTY-TWO (or thereabouts) will all the change and life experience that implies. He's settled! He's ready to have kids!

Their relationship is gonna be so so so messy.

The Movie

As someone who is a big Stiles fan, and appreciates a good Stiles-led fic.. the movie isn’t bad because Stiles isn’t in it.

The movie is bad because it should be a TV show season. It’s too complex for the timeframe. If it had been an extended film, like three hours, it could’ve been FINE. 

The movie is bad because it has so much going on in the worst way, half of the characters get left behind and nobody is happy about it.

The movie is bad because Jeff Davis’ writing is questionable at best sometimes, and he’s determined to have a more confusing timeline than fucking homestuck.

The movie is bad because the lore of Teen Wolf is inconsistent and every time something is established, Jeff Davis has to piss on it.

The movie is bad because it has so many plot holes and loose ends that I don’t think will ever be tied up in a way that is satisfying.

The movie is bad because Jeff Davis seems to have forgotten all the character development we got in season six.

The movie is ‘bad’ because some fans cannot accept that it has been roughly fifteen years since the end of the show in world (not including the time skip) and they don’t like that their favourite couples didn’t work out, even though that is realistic. (Sure maybe one would’ve worked out, like stydia maybe, but certainly not all of them).

The movie is ‘bad’ because some fans will not be satisfied unless it’s the Stiles Show.

Well it's no "unrequited love confession on the way to SuperHell" but I suppose we do have to give "bungled car metaphor delivered in proxy because one of the characters is gone and the other is dead" some credit.

i just need to know like. why and what is the reason and wherefore are we just deciding to kill off perfectly fine and capable and young middle aged characters with their entire fucking half a life ahead of them when they FINALLY step back from the life that should have killed them but didn’t like WHY CAN’T THEY JUST RETIRE AND TAKE THEIR KIDS FISHING AND HAVE BIRTHDAY PARTIES AND A WIFEHUSBAND TO KISS IN THE MORNING AND MAYBE SOME PIE FOR SUPPER ONCE IN AWHILE ITS NOT THAT DEEP

no because i just remembered a few extra things that make the teen wolf m*vie even more of a pathetic exercise in clownery:

allison staying Alive and getting back together w/ scott means that they’re doing a dan/serena in s3 of gossip girl (in that they are dating. while their parents are ALSO dating. ew. gross. what the fuckkkkk)

the age gap between malia and parrish is JUST as gross as when they tried to make lydia and parrish a thing in s5 and it’s disgusting and i hate parrish on the basis that he is an empty husk of a character who’s always Just There and Shirtless Whilst On Fire

speaking of, derek dies by setting himself on fire. FIRE. the same thing that killed HIS FUCKING FAMILY????? and he sets himself on fire in front of his own son which he would never do because he went through the same thing when he watched his family die???? 🥴 huh?????

isaac took the box that contained the nogitsune in it w/ him to like france or whatever. so how the fuck do liam and discount!kira have it with them in JAPAN????? 

the logistics of derek having a 15 yr old child is so ridiculously dumb like they didn’t even TRY with that it makes no sense and the only person who could be the mother is fucking kate argent (derek’s literal rapist) and i hate that so much

stiles would never leave the jeep behind. the jeep is the only thing he has left of his mother. why would he leave it in beacon hills and then never return to beacon hills. lmao.

in the s3 finale, the pack defeats the nogitsune with a WOLF BITE. because he “can’t be a fox and a wolf” (direct quote!). so how the fuck does the nogitsune come back and turn into a *squints* FOX WOLF HYBRID is this even real-

lydia said that her grandmother had banshee premonitions of her own gf dying, and even though she tried to prevent it, her gf died anyway. so how can lydia be 100% sure that if she breaks up with stiles, he still won’t die????? lmao

how are derek and scott both true alphas if there’s only 1 in like a 1000 years or whatever the fuck i forgot but. it’s still stupid

there’s probably more but yeah this is what happens when you can’t just leave well enough alone. let things end. not every piece of media needs a reboot revival requel sequel spinoff whatever. just let things go instead of sacrificing your fans and creativity for a souless cash grab 🫥

OKAY so here are some liam-related thoughts after finishing the teen wolf movie:

- he had like three lines. im not even exaggerating like it truly felt like it was only three lines.

- i wasn't mad at the fact that him and hikari were a thing? like obviously im a ride or die thiam enthusiast but like the only thing that actually bothered me was the lack of EXPLAINING on the script. how did liam get to japan? how did he befriend this girl who turns out to be a kitsune?

- we get NO scenes of liam when scott is being shot by three arrows. scott, HIS ALPHA, who his presumably dying. this pissed me off so much because we know liam is HIS beta, we would suppose they have a really strong connection (which they DO), but there's no shot showcasing that in one of the most important times of the movie. what the fuck.

- THE FUCKING SCENE WITH SCOTT, DEREK AND ELI. like i get it, you couldn't have more than one beta and eli is very important to the plot of the movie (kinda?) but you are actually leaving him out of this. out of the fight. when he's the only werewolf not doing shit.

- honestly they just should've stuck to the queer baiting with this one. like honestly.

Didn't Derek's whole fam die in a fire. To then. Kill him off in a fire.... Like if you had to let him go fine but did it really have to be like that???

Dylan and Arden sitting back drinking wine, unscathed from this dumpster fire like:

So we can all agree that Eli is the Sterek child, right?

He keeps stealing the jeep (for reasons???)

He dresses like Stiles, right down to the flannel over shirt

Prone to overly sarcastic quips (like Stiles)

Does not have a mother? (Really? The writers just left us the perfect opening and thought we wouldn’t take it or something)

Sheriff Stilinski is 100% giving tired grandpa vibes to Eli

SPOILERS AHEAD FOR THE TEEN WOLF MOVIE:

Ok so first of all, the Nogitsune's "divine move" didn't make any sense, wtf was that? They broke all the rules. You can't be a fox and a wolf

Then, there's the lousy excuse for Stiles and Lydia breaking up. The hell. I don't even ship them, but like NO. What, it was too hard to say that he was on an important FBI mission? Losers

Liam, Mason, Hikari, Jackson? What were yall doing here? What purpose did you serve my dudes? I freaking love Liam, and I was so excited for Hikari, and then they give us this. They barely even talked.

I was so confused during the entire movie, I didn't know whether or not Chris and Melissa were still a thing??

It wasn't explained properly enough that Malia was actually kind of Eli's aunt/cousin/sibling, like it took me a while to figure out he had grown up in her presence

Btw who tf is Eli's mom??? When they started mentioning Harris I was like oh we're probably gonna see Jennifer again right it's all linked, she came right before the Nogitsune it would make sense that she has something to do with his return and maybe she's also Eli's mom, like it was the most logical explanation if we think of the timeline but no, nope, Eli just doesn't have a mom!

Also what was Harris doing here? And the acting of the guy who plays him was weird (sorry to hate but not sorry it was really bad)

Allison coming back to stay just ruined her previous departure

They should have implied Thiam was a thing not give Liam a f*cking girlfriend

The way Allison came back was laughable

Why did they have to make Malia and Parrish a thing they interacted like twice

The random swearing every five minutes just because they could put it there smh

The way they explained Eli's reluctance to transforming being trauma and then Derek doing just the thing that traumatized Eli in order for him to transform and it working???

I'm so sad and disappointed we didn't see more Malia/Derek interactions it would have been f*king hilarious

Last but not least, Derek. Derek dying, after everything that he'd been through. After all the abuse and years of fighting. They pulled an Enzo St. John fr. Derek dying in the same way his entire family died. Burned alive. And the writers being like "Yeah but look it's okay he became a true alpha" IDGAF. HE PROBABLY DIDN'T GAF EITHER. MY DUDE WANTED TO LIVE. HE WANTED TO RAISE HIS KID. AND THEN HE DIES AND ALLISON AND SCOTT JUST KISS LOVINGLY LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED, LIKE ELI ISN'T CRYING ON THE GROUNG TRAUMATIZED AFTER WATCHING HIS FATHER BURN TO DEATH?!?! Also Malia was the one who had the most appropriate reaction like thank you for being the only one to be shocked and crying, queen. Your cousin deserved better

Derek got sent to Superhell in the movie? I feel like I've unlocked forbidden knowledge

Also that you die when the wolfsbane reaches your heart. And Scott’s poisoning went past his heart and to his head. Tell me how that works.

Hey Jeff Davis one note among many, but did you know that for a wound made with wolfsbane, you actually need to burn it with the ash of that specific strand of wolfsbane to heal it?

This particular piece of knowledge comes from the tv show you created called Teen Wolf which you may or may not be familiar with.

Ten thousand fanfic writers have gotten this particular piece of lore correct for a decade since you invented it. There are fics where Stiles’ love language is gathering different kinds of wolfsbane to always be able to save Derek Hale.

Truly, get yourself sorted sir (disrespectful).

I am not usually one to post but I just need to rant about the teen wolf movie. *spoiler alert*

They did everyone but Scott dirty. And I know the ending was about how great Derek was and how he is the best person ever. They are not wrong but his son has so many problems with him and when they finally start to get along. DEREK DIES!!! Like what the heck. And how they only mentioned stiles like 3 times and they carefully edited him out of important sense and yes I know that was partly because of Dylan O’Brien and legal issues but still. And how easily sterek could have been cannon. Like all Eli had to do was call the sheriff grandpa and there sterek. They already had a grandpa-grandson relationship. I mean the sheriff came to threaten and this fool went “oh it’s just you” like buddy. And Derek and the sheriff had a father son relationship. And also how Eli is basically a mini stiles.

Scott is such a bad alpha. Like why would he leave his territory like that. He didn’t even tell his mom he was coming back. Didn’t even try to help with Eli only at the end. Like the first three season he only cares about Allison and everyone else can go fuck themselves. Love Allison but still.

Not to mention all the plot holes. Like who’s Eli’s mother? What up with stiles? Why bring back Allison but not Aiden? Who is the girl with Liam? Where were they at the beginning of the movie? Why do they have the nogitsune and why is it not with Chris or the hale vaults? Are the sheriff and Melissa together?

And how Harris doesn’t tie in with the whole thing. Like what.

There are so so so SO many other things but I won’t. I just feel like screaming, it was so bad.

Thank you for listening to my Ted talk. Have a nice night.

Teenwolf Thiam prompt

This is a sorta fix it prompt because the movie was kinda shit xx

*only Hikari had been caught by the oni's*

Queue Theo dragging Liam away from the group of oni's (just like the elevator scene with the ghost riders)

Liam: Let go of me, they took her !

Theo: If I let go of you, they'll take you too

Liam: Why would you care!?

Theo: Liam, you need to calm down

Liam: No, why do you care so much if they take me!?

Theo: Because I'm still inlove with you idiot, after we broke up 5 years ago-

Liam: Yeah and whose fault was that?

Theo: -I know but listen, after we broke up I didn't, I haven't moved on, how could I? I understand you did but I'm not about to watch you get taken or leave again

Liam: What do you mean 'I've moved on'?

Theo: You and Hikari

Liam: Me and Hikari aren't together she's my bestfriend, and it's my fault she's gone, because I'm the one who brought her here

Theo: So you haven't moved on?

Liam: Is that all you got from that? And no I haven't but I've gotten over it

Theo: Do you think there's a chance-

Liam: We are not doing this right now

If anyone has any or knows of any fanfics similar to this let me know please

love that in the movie jackson is walking around saying dumb shit like 'what do detectives even do' and then proceeds to know exactly the smell of a specific tree burning

Eli in the past.

So I had to make this, because let's be honest the movie was...I can't find the words to describe it. The only good thing about it, is Eli.

"So you are telling us…That you are the son of Derek" Stile asked unsure of what reaction he should give, he was happy for his sour wolf Did he just call me him his ? and as much as he wanted to deny the pit in his stomach but he couldn't.

It may sound selfish and heartless, but Stiles wished this was all a nightmare or that the boy was maybe one of Derek's one-night stands, or that the mother died while giving birth. Unfortunately, this was all a wish from a broken heart.

"Who is your mother?" Lydia asked when she notice how silent Stiles become, and before Eli could respond the door opened.

"Dad!" Eli happily called seeing Derek at the door, "MOM!" That earned everyone's attention.

Eli throw himself at (Y/N) and Derek who just stared at each other completely clueless about what was happening.

If Stiles was feeling awful, he just wished for one of his crushes to die.

"What is going on?" Derek questioned without letting go of the child in his arms.

(Y/N) walked to Stiles putting a comforting hand on his should as she noticed his dejected expression.

When did she get here? He thought.

"You're okay?" She asked her tone soft. Like always when she talked to him.

Okay, now he felt much worse. He stood up abruptly leaving the place before any could stop him.

"Is he okay?" (Y/N) asked, and no one responded. Not even Scott. Who knew about Stiles feeling for you two.

"I will go talk to him" Scott left giving everyone an apologetic smile.

"So…Can someone explain what a kid doing in my loft, and why is he calling me dad?" Derek raised an eyebrow completely ignoring the kid that left him to hug (Y/N), and the oblivious blush on his cheek.

"Kid, I'm sorry to say this but I'm not your mother. I'm tto young to give birth." (Y/N) explain to the kid tryingto get him off her.

"Not yet, but soon" He pointed out, smiling shiply.

"So what's your name and why are you here?" (Y/N) shacked her head putting the groceries away with Derek. She decided to take things slowly and maybe understand the boy.

"I'm Eli (last name) Mieczyslaw Hale" He happily introduced himself arms spread wide, and from your chock you let the plate shatter on the ground.

"I don't believe you!" You whispered.

Eli turns your way, lifting his shirt to show a half-moon shape on the middle of his chest.

"Impossible!" You slowly walked toward him, before hesitantly tracing the mark.

"It looks just likes yours, doesn't it?" Eli asked smiling at you. You nodded silently. You didn't know what to say or if you were even capable.

"You are my child" You hugged him, tears falling down your cheeks, with the biggest smile on your face.

The half-moon shape, that looked like a burn was a symbol of your home, you pack. Unfortunately, an accident happened and they all die. You felt it as if your heart was burning more with their soul slowly leaving each one of them.

-----------------------------------------------

"So you're telling me…I married two men?" (Y/N) raised an eyebrow, passing a bowl of fruit to the boy, who happily took it grinning.

Everyone had left except you and Stiles, with a promise of giving them details later, since they had school tomorrow morning. Eli had insisted that Stiles stays, and either way, he was your ride home.

"What's with the grin?" You ask, with a smile of your own, you were still not yet over the fact that you had such a beautiful kid.

"You always prepare, a bowl of fruits with some yoghurt for me and the twins. for our movie night. Each Friday." He looked down at the bowl sniffing.

"Used?" You asked worriedly about what have happened in the future.

"You fallen into coma after your saved dad from sacrificing himself" Eli wiped his tears, before giving a smile. He was obliviously trying to hide his fellings, and even if he wasn't your child yet, you hugged him burying his face in your chest.

Your motherly warmth caused all of his hidden emotions to explode. He couldn't help himself from crying, letting everything out. All the fear and all the frustration he buried for months inside of him.

You let him, until he calmed down enough to eat his fruit, and explain. With both of the men just watching you act like mother.

---------------------------------------

"You married dad " He pointed at Derek, who was leaning against the wall, watching from a distance while the boy was still laying on your chest "You got married when you were fourth month pregnant, at that time you were already married to papa Stiles" This seems to catch all your attention, especially Stiles.

"Papa Stiles?" You titled your head.

"Yes,from I was told you had a big fight broke between you and Dad. He said some hurtful things, so you left with papa Stiles to study aboard" He hatefully glared at his dad, before turning to you with the biggest smiles "two months later you discovered you were pregnant..Papa Stiles took the opportunaty to marry you and protect you" He left your arms to go to stiles, who hugged him back with a big smile.

I married (Y/N). Stiles is over the moon biting his lips tp stop a giggle from escaping, at the thought of you two living together, with you wearing a ring, proof that you belong to him, just as how belongs to you.

Stiles didn't look much older than Eli. They looked more like brothers than a father and a son, yet your son seem to look at him with such admiration, causing Derek to clench his teeth, eyes turning slightly yellow.

"and one night he called Dad and told him about everything. He thought he deserved to know that you never cheated on him…You may guess what happened. Dad come and demanded a DNA test, and just like you expected I was his child, and you never cheated" He took some paper out of his jacket passing it to you.

The paper had your full name, with Derek's too.

"He tried to apologize but you refuse to even see his face, but papa Stiles convinced you…Few dates from here and there and you were back together just this time with Papa Stiles, by your side." Stiles was looking at Eli with so much love it warm your heart, yet broke you, you didn't want for Stiles to feel obligated to marry you just because of you been pregnant.

You wish it was his-the child-, because to be honest you always liked Stiles, yet you never dared to express those feelings, knowing well that he liked Lydia.

"What about the twins?" You questioned.

"They are my half-brother and sister, you had them from Papa Stiles" Your head snaps to Stiles, whose jaw dropped. You turned to Derek, and he give the same reaction. Not like it changed, since Eli explained that he was his son.

Oh my God, I have twins. Stiles thought.

"That doesn't explain why you're here?" You asked, and sudenly the boy got nervous.

"After you got on a coma our family start falling apart… Espacially after grandma came back." The boy buried himself in Stiles' chest.

"My mom?" Your voice cracked and your heart skipped a beat, earning you a look of worry from both men.

"She tried to make Dads divorce you, when they showed her that she already had children with both of them, she just laughed and asked them to keep us" Your grip harden around Stiles, making him pat him softly.

"I-I…I didn't know what to do, she already had everything ready, a lawyer, evidence to show that you were forced to marry them" You frowned, before softly standing.

"That's why you came here" You concluded, before wrapping your hands around him. The three of you hugged him, giving him a little comfort.

"I was in your room looking for something against her, when sudenly I was teleported here" You closed your eyes, searching in your mind before it hit you.

"Wait here!" You run to Derek's room,and few minutes later you came back with two books in hand.

"I think you were looking for those" you handed them to Eli, who opened one of them to see writings.

"What are those?" Eli asked, "Those are my journal, from when I used to live with my mom…I think it's more than enough evidance to use" Eli's eyes lit up.

"I hide them, in Derek's room since no one will think or dare to look for them there" You awkwardly laughed, looking away from Derek, who himself didn't know that something precious was hiding in his room.

"When did you put them there?" He found himself asking.

"After two weeks after we started dating" You explained going back to you previous position, stealing your son from Stiles.

You started dating Derek, giving him a chance, when you caught Stiles and Lydia kissing.

"Oh" He simply replaied.

"It's getting late, why don't we leave. We still have school tomorow" You yawned, eyes already closing.

"Can…C-Can we all sleep together?" Eli yawned too, refusing to let you go.

You three looked at each other and shrugged, but deep inside you all were excited to sleep together.

And God knows how fast you all had fallen asleep that night. All warm, with one wish, is for this moment to never end or at least last longer, so you can all graved in your heart and mind.

Somehow, Allison Argent survived

Being Liam Dunbar's Twin Sister Would Include...

Gif not mine. Credits to the rightful owner.

A/N: Requests are open.

Being born five minutes after Liam, and him constantly pulling the “I’m older” card

Fighting constantly over your toys when you were toddlers

Throwing food at each other

Pulling each other’s hair

Biting each other

Overall, being a constant headache to your parents until you reached adolesence

Being the only one able to calm him down during his outrages

Making sure he took his I.E.D. medication

Occasionally threating him to do so

Standing up for him against Brett

Making out with Brett

Transferring to Beacon Hills High with him

Stiles instantly taking a liking at you

You confronting Scott when he bit Liam

“What the hell were you thinking?! He has I.E.D.!”

Stiles agreeing with you

“I told him it was a bad idea.”

Helping Liam control the change and eventually becoming his anchor

Giving Hayden dirty looks every now and then

Making out with Brett during lacrosse games

Liam and Stiles not being happy about it

Being best friends with Mason

Sleepovers at your place with the pack

Falling asleep in Liam’s arms and him carrying you to your room

Liam comforting you after Brett’s death

Gabe and Nolan threating you

Mason standing up for you

Eventually going to different colleges

Missing him terribly

Facetiming every night

Surprise visits every now and then

Moving back to Beacon Hills together after finishing college

. . . cue mission impossible music !