Skz Sfw - Blog Posts

you can burst into flames.

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pairing: seungmin x gender neutral reader

content warnings: hurt/comfort, reader has a fear of thunderstorms, reader goes nonverbal

rating: e (for everyone)

summary: seungmin helps you get through a thunderstorm by showering you with tender love and singing to you.

🕯️ volcano — seungmin & han (2 kids’ show)

A myriad of candles lit up the bedroom you’ve shared with your lover for a few years, casting its yellow glow over the sheltered space while the world outside took on the wrath of the thunderous storm that has carried on for the past several hours. Your soft snores were the only sounds heard apart from the violent pattering of the rain against the windows and the occasional boom of thunder, your head rested on Seungmin’s chest as you’d finally slept.

The two of you had just settled on the couch to watch a movie together when it first started raining, a small detail you’d taken note of yet paid no mind to at first. Although as the weather worsened, so did your anxiety. Seungmin was well aware of the person you became whenever the first strike of lightning occurred – almost as though you had been replaced before his very eyes as your muscles tensed and your eyes clouded with fear. He’d tried to comfort you as soon as he knew what would come, though nothing can really prevent you from panicking, and this was a fact that aggrieved him deeply since he would do anything to make you smile once again although this was beyond his power.

When the power went out as a result of the storm, the trembling and whimpering began. Seungmin was not allowed to leave your side for even a second as you gripped the hem of his shirt. And so he gently took your hand and guided you towards the hallway closet where you stored the innumerable amounts of candles you liked buying, and then took you with him towards the kitchen to find a lighter. Throughout the entire process, you could hear him murmuring sweet little nothings as a form of encouragement while moving at the pace you’d set. He sat you on your bed, and immediately began lighting as many candles as he could, creating as much light as he could before he settled beside you. Arms pulling you into his comforting embrace, your back pressed to his chest as he whispered about how brave you were being. You didn’t think so, since you felt a little ridiculous being so afraid of something so silly at your age, but the sincerity in his voice made you feel validated.

“I’m sorry,” you whimpered after jumping at a particularly loud crack of thunder. “This is so stupid, and we were having such a nice time before all of this.”

Seungmin pressed a tender kiss to the back of your head, settling his chin on top of your head as his thumb rubbed gentle circles on your shoulder. “Sorry for what? There’s nothing to be sorry about.”

You couldn’t help but pout slightly, sitting up so you could look at him. He merely chuckled at the sight, hand reaching up to push a strand of hair away from your face and you could see the tiny flames from the candles reflected in his eyes. It took everything in you to not melt into his touch, your heart immediately steadying. Love was engraved in every touch, every word and you adored it. You adored him in a way you couldn’t even begin to describe. “I’m sorry you’re dating someone with childish fears.”

His expression suddenly turned serious as he furrowed his brows and frowned up at you. “It’s not childish at all, what are you talking about? I don’t want to hear any self-pitying from you, I want you to know that you’re being very brave, and I love that about you.”

He looked so stern you couldn’t help but smile a little bit, rolling your eyes playfully. But as you glanced at him again, you could see the expectant expression on his face as he waited for you to say the same words he always forced you to say in moments like these. So you sighed, moving around on the bed so that you could rest your head on his chest. However, right as you opened your mouth another thunder seemed to shake the room, which caused you to scream in surprise instead. His arms immediately wrapped themselves around your trembling body, hands squeezing whatever he could grab as a way to make sure you knew he was there with you.

With your eyes squeezed shut, you mumbled over and over again: “I’m being brave right now. The storm can’t touch me. I’m safe with Seungmin. I’m being brave right now. The storm can’t touch me. I’m safe with Seungmin. I’m being so brave right now, and Seungmin is proud of me.”

Seungmin’s lips pressed against your hair once again as he settled into a more comfortable position from underneath you. “I am so, so proud of my baby right now.”

Although the rain had shown signs of slowing down over the past hour, it seemed to intensify now, and your body began trembling once more. Seungmin was at a loss right now, he couldn’t think of anything else to say or do while the two of you rode out the storm. It wasn’t the first time that he’d had to help you through something like this, and he was always so willing to calm your mind and settle your heart each and every time; though it always seemed as though he would run out of things to do or say as the storms carried on. As you balled up his shirt into your shaking fists, he cleared his throat.

“You know,” he began, voice soft yet loud enough to be heard over the noise. “Hannie and Chan have been working on a song together. It made me think of you.”

This piqued your interest, releasing a shuddering breath as you momentarily looked up to let him know you’ve heard him since your voice seemed to have stopped working. He understood immediately as his eyes remained fixated on the dancing flames of the candles he’d placed in front of your bedroom television.

“You know Hannie’s always been good with words.” Seungmin smiled slightly at the thought, his fingers finding their way to your hair as he played with it. “Would you like to hear it?”

Without hesitation, you reach over his lower torso to squeeze his hip. Another crack of thunder was heard, and you jumped.

“I’ll protect you, it’s okay to hurt,” he began, your eyes shutting as his melodic voice rang through the air. “I’ll embrace the wounds you shed. To me, you’re already a sin…”

A soft smile tugged on your lips, your heart and breathing steadied at last, your muscles relaxing. Seungmin could feel the weight of your body change almost immediately as he continued to sing, and his heart soared at the realization of the effect he had on you. “...You were so warm when you hugged me tight. I guess I teared up for a moment, because it was the first time…”

Anything outside of this embrace seemed to fade away at your lover’s soulful singing, the warmth of his body and his fingertips that traced swirly figures on your skin bringing a sense of peace you didn’t expect. You sighed in content.

“...You can burst into flames, you can wound me next to you if you like, I can be anything…”

As the first of your snores were heard, Seungmin finally relaxed completely. You’ve endured another stormy night, and his own heart warmed at the sight of your sleeping figure. He didn’t stop singing, though, determined to finish the song at this point – the song that had reminded him of you the first time he read the lyrics, the song he’d unintentionally associated with you and he wasn’t the least bit sorry about it.

“...you are my volcano.”

word count: 1.2k 🕯️ posted: 12 • 02 • 2023

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# @grandpafelixx

erase me from your memory.

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pairing: hyunjin x gender neutral reader

content warnings: post-breakup healing, sadness

rating: 13+

summary: half a year after you and hyunjin break up, you find that you’ve somehow healed.

🌱 untitled — hyunjin & i.n (2 kids’ show)

His name is one that your journal has known for a very long time – and it will be one that it will never forget. Pages upon pages you find him embedded into every word you poured out, every tear, every smile was written for him without you realizing it. Your entire world spun around him, and just as soon as he waltzed into your life, he left.

Please erase me from your memory and go find your happiness, he’d said to you then as you begged him to stay. He didn’t seem to understand that his touch would forever be tattooed onto your skin, his passing love would always be yearned by your heart, and his words would forever burn in your mind. Hwang Hyunjin would be a love that you were determined to remember for as long as humanly possible, because although his feelings for you had fizzled out over time, it was once as intense and real as the sun that rises and falls every day.

You weren’t angry at him anymore, a part of you had finally come to understand that nothing lasts forever, and that Hyunjin was your dream love and would always remain just that – a dream. All that was left of you was a shell of who you’d once been before him, though there was a certain hollowness that ate you up from within. Dying of heartbreak was something you thought was real when you watched the door close behind him for the very last time, spending weeks catching glimpses of his shadow from the corner of your eyes and deluding yourself into thinking you’d heard his voice as you waited for your shattered heart to finally give up pumping your blood through your veins. A life without Hyunjin was one you didn’t think was worth living.

However, half a year has gone by since you spoke to him last, and you were still alive, still breathing. You were currently in the same park in which you’d met him some years ago, sitting on the very same bench in which you’d sat with him for hours after first meeting as you chatted about everything and nothing and unknowingly fell headfirst into love. And although the memory sent a twinge of pain, you realized for the first time in what had felt like forever that you could breathe properly and that you were okay now. Most of all, you understand now that Hwang Hyunjin would be a memory that you would look back on with fondness when you’re older and wiser – perhaps he will be the love you would tell your children about when they inevitably get their hearts broken for the first time. You were grateful for the opportunity to know such a unique soul, and to have had him in your arms if only for a brief moment.

You saw him from afar today at the coffee shop at the end of the street, but you don’t think he noticed you. This was what compelled you to return to this park for the first time in a while, because he looked well and healthy. He had carried on with his life, and maybe you have as well. All you could really hope was that he remembered you as well, and that when he found his next lover, if he hadn’t already, he thought of you and the beautiful life you had once planned together.

Please erase me from your memory and go find your happiness, he’d said to you then as you begged him to stay. He thought forgetting would be a blessing, but you didn’t need to forget him to feel okay or to find happiness. You didn’t think he understood the impact he’d had in your life and that was okay.

You are fine. You are alive and well, but most importantly, you are healing.

word count: 644 🌱 posted: 12 • 01 • 2023

💬 a note from green;

after posting jeongin’s you can blame me if you want, i listened to the song again. somehow doing it made me think of my own journal — specifically from when i was going through my first heartbreak. it was a bittersweet experience, and i was able to see how much i’d grown since then. for the first time since i thought about my ex, i realized i was grateful for the pain. without such pain that they caused me, i wouldn’t have learned what i wanted and needed out of a relationship.

to anyone who’s going through a breakup: no one dies from a broken heart. one day you will wake up and your heart won’t ache anymore. it won’t feel empty. a day will come when you will smile again, fall in love again, and look back at this moment with pride as you take notice of your growth.

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# @grandpafelixx

blame me if you want.

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pairing: jeongin x gender neutral reader

content warnings: heartbreak, angst, crying, break up

rating: 13+

summary: you deluded yourself into thinking you and jeongin were meant to last forever. but after some time where he felt distant, you come to find out why.

🍂 untitled — hyunjin & i.n (2 kids’ show)

His hands shook slightly as they held your face as though you were to break into a thousand pieces if he let you go, and you thought you might, too, since your heart had just been shattered by the man you’d once named your forever; why not let your body and soul follow your heart into the disaster it is now? You watched as tears threatened to spill, his voice cracked and his lips formed a trembling frown, though it didn’t compare to the storm of tears rolling down your cheeks or the sobs that continuously escaped past your lips, your expression twisted into one of pure heartbreak.

“I— I really didn’t want us to end like this, Jeongin,” you sobbed, and you knew he could barely understand what you were trying to say through the hiccups and cries. “But it’s like you’ve mentally been away for months now and I don’t know what I can do anymore. I can’t continue living like this, losing sleep because I can’t figure out what is happening and you keep refusing to talk about it.”

Jeongin pulled you to his chest, resting his chin on top of your head as the fingers of one hand gripped your shirt. He was shaking all over, but you were inconsolable.

“You’ve said it on my behalf, Y/N.” He began, voice crackling as he held back tears. “At some point, your eyes felt so cold, and perhaps I am the reason, but —”

You pulled away from him, eyebrows furrowed. “If I ever looked at you coldly, I never meant it. Baby, I promise that —”

“No, not like that,” he interrupted. “I mean, I didn’t feel the same way that I used to. I’m not sure how or when it happened, but it did. I couldn’t figure out how to tell you, but I really didn’t want things to get to this point.”

A tear finally rolled down his cheek as he spoke, voice growing thicker as he held back his own devastation. His words felt as though he’d pushed you off of a cliff and now you were just falling without a safety net by yourself.

“Y/N, I know in my heart that you leaving me and finding someone who truly deserves you before this pain gets any deeper is the best thing you can do.” A choked sob escaped from his lips and he sniffled, looking away for a moment to compose himself. “I tried to be your forever, I really did. But now I’m not sure of anything; did I really fall in love? Or was it a selfish decision made for my own sake to escape from my loneliness? At first, I didn’t even want to entertain the idea but, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since.”

The room was spinning at his words, your sobs intensifying while you pulled away from him completely. You were angry now, hurt, betrayed.

“What are you implying?” Your voice was louder than you’d intended, but you also couldn’t bring yourself to care when your whole world was collapsing in on itself at the moment. “Are you saying that everything we’d been through wasn’t real? Every beautiful minute spent together didn’t make you feel like this could be forever?”

You were standing now, looking down on his shiny eyes as more tears rolled freely down his achingly beautiful face; even with emotions running high, it took everything in you to not kiss them away. But he didn’t deserve that anymore, and you were well aware. When you called him over with the intention to end things, you wanted him to argue with you and tell you that you guys could work things out. You wanted to hear him say that he loved you, and that he didn’t agree with this decision. Anything to show you that he cared and was willing to fight for you and your relationship with him. Instead you found yourself feeling as though he’d punched you in the gut when he agreed wholeheartedly. Now every year spent with him was in question as you wondered just how much of it was as real to him as it had been for you. How many times did he lie through his teeth as he told you he loved you? The thought had you shaking with rage.

Jeongin didn’t respond, only sat there as he watched you back away from him slowly.

“Was I really just someone to keep your bed warm? Who the fuck says that?”

Jeongin finally stood up, hands attempting to reach you but you moved away before he could. “No, I don’t think it was like that —”

“You don’t think, Jeongin? This was the part where you told me ‘No, Y/N, it definitely wasn’t like that’. But you stand there and tell me you don’t think I was just a warm body so you didn’t feel so lonely? You’re such a coward.”

“I know that I am!” For the first time ever, Jeongin raised his voice, which took you aback. “You can blame me if you want, Y/N, but you have to believe me when I tell you that I didn’t want this to drag on like this. There were so many times where I tried to be honest about my feelings but I would look at you and always feel like such a monster for wanting to end things when what we had was so good. Don’t you think I hate this too?”

You remained silent, his words echoing in your mind. It didn’t make sense to you, nothing did. “If what we had was so good, then why did you stop loving me? When did you stop seeing me as your future?”

He opened his mouth but nothing came out. His shoulders slumped when he mumbled, “I have no idea.”

You sniffled, wrapping your own arms around yourself as you watched him. The crying had subsided a little bit by that point, and you could feel your chest becoming numb the longer he remained there. He stood before you, a shell of a man who had once decided to fall with you, but now he watched as you fell on your own to your own doom. The future looked so bleak without him, and you didn’t think you could ever forgive him for this.

“Do you think you would’ve said something sooner rather than later if I hadn’t called you over?”

“I don’t know. I hope so.”

You inhaled sharply, and exhaled shakily, your heart beating in your throat as you prepared to say the next words you’d never even dreamt of saying: “I think you should leave.”

Worst of all, Jeongin only nodded before walking out of your place. He didn’t even look back before closing the door behind him, leaving you a shattered mess.

word count: 1.1k 🍂 posted: 11 • 30 • 2023

💬 a note from green;

i watched hyunjin and i.n’s 2 kids show yesterday and their untitled song had me in tears and inspired me to write this sad little thing. i hope you guys enjoy, i might post something with hyunjin too though i don’t know.

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