Simon Fairchild - Blog Posts

Guys,

Peter Lukas, Elias Bouchard, Simon Fairchild

Who’s wearing what to the rich gay old men Nike sponsored sleepover

These designs go crazy tbh

After slowly chipping away at this for a while, I'm finally done drawing the cast of The Magnus Archives!

I had this EXACT thought about an hour before seeing this post and started immediately planning Large Art Projects That I Will Never Finish based on it because That Is What I Do

ok ok, so, I just kind of realised that Simon Fairchild is older than planes right? so, can you imagine how excited he was when they were invented? he felt the fresh fear of the wright brothers for those first 12 seconds and went insane.

OR, alternatively, he invented the aeroplane because he was bored of just throwing people from cliffs

ohmygod. he was absolutely fucking ecstatic. overwhelmed with joy. best day of his life. he would force every other avatar onto a plane immediately

Elias, Peter Lukas, and Simon fairchild 200% have biweekly tea meetings where they gossip about the powers and make subtle digs at eachother

lil simon portrait because i needed...a profile picture?

Mike crew and Simon fairchild meet once on an airplane and it goes like this

Mike: *throws someone off the plane so that they are falling for all eternity*

Simon: hey I was gonna do that. Who are u?

Mike: I'm Mike, I work for the vast. Who are u?

Simon: I'm simon and I work for the vast

Mike: wait if I work for the vast and u work for the vast, then who's flying this plane?

Simon and Mike both laugh hysterically as the plane begins to experience severe turbulence. The passengers all scream.

Mike Crew: No more than 5′ tall. 

Simon Fairchild: “Tiny, pink skeleton of a man.”

So what I’m saying is all Vast avatars are tiny and are compensating by having their huge endless patron. 

As a would-be avatar of the Vast I feel this in a spiritual way.

ever think about how vast avatars are just like. really short. just so fucking small in every way. imagine walking into a fairchild family gathering and absolutely everyone’s 5′0 or under. these seriously tinyass people just love flying through the air because they like to feel tall. like weenie dogs on the kitchen counter of the universe. they take the “how’s the weather up there” joke and just make it into a threat. they look at somebody who clears 6′ ft and feel the need to fling them into an unforgiving void because tall people don’t have the chops to get out of it. do you want to know what the weather is like up here. fuck with me and find out.

I have to admit, even if

One; Simon Fairchild is my favourite of the Old Eldritch Horror Man Trio

And two; I'd probably be an avatar of the Vast and at the end of the day I'd be treated just the same;

I almost laughed through the tears when I learned that he got fucking kneecapped by an angry mob.

Me and Mr. Fairchild have very similar reactions.

I was expecting a quiet little episode, AND I GOT SIMON FUCKING FAIRCHILD-

I already loved the concept of an old man flying out planes for fun... Hearing him interact with people, FUCK.

I love his character already... I can't say I'm disappointed.

Go grandpa!!

"hey guys hey guys you know what would be funny? Hey guys guess what " *maniacal giggling*

ms fleming is elias if you even care

"steve (peter) I'm ending our affair"

sure bud

I'm back with the musicals x tma

heathers but ram and kurt are mike crew and oliver banks and their dads are simon and rayner

also imho the heathers should be jane jude and julia

my reasoning for all of this? it'd be funny and my dead gay son would be even funnier

I'm back with the musicals x tma

heathers but ram and kurt are mike crew and oliver banks and their dads are simon and rayner

also imho the heathers should be jane jude and julia

my reasoning for all of this? it'd be funny and my dead gay son would be even funnier

Guys,

Peter Lukas, Elias Bouchard, Simon Fairchild

Who’s wearing what to the rich gay old men Nike sponsored sleepover

he's yapping abt simon

amendment ❗️❗️

hermes= still simon cus of the flying (falling) and it'd be funny

the fates= melanie, basira, daisy

workers= sasha, tim, georgie

the band=

trombone- leitner

cello- smirke

violin- jane prentiss

drums- michael crew

bass- gerard keay

guitar- gertrude

keys- mikaele salesa

idea tma hadestown au

hades= peter

persephone= elias

orpheus= jon

eurydice= martin

(eurydice dying is martin going to the lonely)

the next ones make less sense I just think they'd be funny

hermes= simon

the fates= sasha, tim, georgie(??? idk)

idea tma hadestown au

hades= peter

persephone= elias

orpheus= jon

eurydice= martin

(eurydice dying is martin going to the lonely)

the next ones make less sense I just think they'd be funny

hermes= simon

the fates= sasha, tim, georgie(??? idk)

can someone who can animate make meet the plastics but regina is like peter ig and gretchen is elias and I guess Karen would be simon

the idea of elias as gretchen is just so funny to me

Martins imagination probably: Magnus archives EP 174

okay Simon Fairchild

-old-ass man simon fairchild running out of witty one-liners to say before causing the weirdest day of someone's life

spaceship minifigure anon. do it. spike me off the roof. you won't

your going here👇

Walked into an Apple store the other day (the phone one) bc I was looking for jobs and like

It was nothing if not Vast like. Like I felt like Mr Fairchild himself was gonna try sell me a phone

Apple stores are Vast locations and the employees are avatars