Remus Being Remus - Blog Posts

Remus: Fruits that do not live up to their names; passionfruit, grapefruit, honeydew and dragonfruit.

Remus: Fruits that do live up to their names?

Remus: Orange.

I want a Severus X marauders (excluding Peter) where it's like those jeverus fics where baby harry goes back in time and then shocks everyone by being the child of James and sev.

Like this⬇

Dumbledore finds baby harry and baby harry tells who his parents are and for his own amusement during lunch in the great Hall he makes the announcement that a baby has traveled back in time and that his future parents have to take care of him till they can figure out how to send him back

Everyone is silent waiting for home to announce the parents "Harry's Father's-" whispers "fathers? " "what-? " "was it an affair or? " "I wonder who-" "SILENCE" ".... " "as I was saying Harry's fathers.. Yes more than one harry has three fathers and one mother. It was not an affair it seems that the three fathers had fallen for the same person and that person loved them all and didn't wish to choose. So they all formed a relationship. " "..wow" "I will now call each father to come up here to meet little harry" (shush he wants drama that's why he's making the come to everyone's view" ".. James Potter" ! James walks up to Dumbledore and instantly loves harry "Sirius Black" Sirius looks surprised but goes up next to James and looks at his future son "he looks a lot like you James" "I know! " *ahem* "and the last father...Remus Lupin" Remus freezes before hesitantly going up and looks at harry "wow... I didn't think I'd have a kid"-R " I didn't think we'd all have a and kid and relationship with the same person! "-J " well we always share"-S "and now for Harry's mother.. " everyone is quite then Severus, who wasn't interested, starts to leave and harry See's.

Harry perks up and runs from his fathers toward Snape and screams "MOMMY!" Sev feels a tiny body ramming into his leg, he looks down at harry shocked he goes to tell him that's absurd but his heart melts as he looks at harry clinging to him and instead picks him up and smiles at harry and softly talks to him, without realizing it he instantly went into mommy mode, while everyone is silently flipping their shit, Remus being the first to calm down goes up to sev and harry

And you can make up the rest. I just wanna find a fic like that 😢🥺

Remus Lupin the werewolf wore wool sweaters

He was literally a wolf in sheep‘s clothing

Now I understand why they thought he was the snitch

Voldemort: *enjoying his time shaming Bellatrix and Narcissa that Nymphadora maried Remus*

Narcissa & Draco: *had the time of their lives in that wedding*

Remus gets little chocolate finger prints on his book pages, especially over the summer when he will sit outside and read and eat chocolate while James and Sirius play quidditch

So I made a thing...

remus is the type of guy no one really pays attention to in the hall but all his friends would f*ck him

remus would throw his shoe at james or peter when they'd annoy him (not sirius though because he knows sirius would change into padfoot and chew on it)

remus never runs. he will not, under any circumstances, run anywhere. not even when he is late to class or gets caught after curfew. if you ever saw him run, it was not him.

Remus: You are supposed to bang your fist against mine.

Regulus: Why?

Remus: I am told it is a widely accepted gesture for mutual success.

Sirius:

Sirius: I love it when you two impersonate normal people.

Lily: what's your biggest fear?

Remus: my biggest fear is that one day I'll wake up as a chocolate bar.

Lily: you would eat yourself, wouldn't you?

Remus, whispering with a horrified look: I wouldn't even question it.

Walburga: You are not good enough for my son.

Remus: You’re not good enough for your son.

Walburga: Excuse me?

Remus: You heard me.

laters baby | remus lupin x fem!reader

hello babes

warnings- 18+ minors DNI, smut, unprotected sex, alcohol, smoking, semi-public sex, cursing?

word count- 1.7k

this is post hogwarts marauders era (au?)  besties (throwback to when they were all happy lol)

a/n- i do not give anyone permission to copy my work. sorry it took so long to get something else out i just got back from nyc!!

The brick wall of the pub you had previously occupied was pressing into your cheek as your boyfriend pounded into you from behind. He had one hand gripped in your hair, the other holding your hip to bring you back into his thrusts. 

You had not imagined your night to go this way. In fact, you were expecting to go out for a few drinks with everyone and head home to watch a muggle film you were craving to see. But as the night went on James and Sirius pressed more drinks into Remus’ hands than he realized. While the boys were sat at the bar (getting your poor boyfriend wasted) you, Lily, and Marlene were making haste on the dance floor. 

The liquor was intense and the room was spinning around you as you jumped and danced. You glanced towards the boys and saw them all laughing unnecessarily loud. You grabbed Marlene’s arm and shouted you were going to get another drink. She merely nodded and kept dancing. 

As you approached the bar Remus caught sight of you. He blushed and sent a smirk your way. His hair was tousled and his eyes glazed over from the drinks he’d been consuming. 

“Jesus, you poor bloke you’re truly wasted.” You sighed as you neared him.

Sirius spat out a laugh and James just smiled into his drink and shrugged his shoulders. Remus grabbed your waist when you were within reach and placed his head on your shoulder. He inhaled you and caged you into his arms. You wrapped your arm around him in return and placed your head atop his. 

“God you two are awful to look at. Keep it in your pants will you?” Sirius made a crude vomiting gesture and you swatted at him in return. 

“Oi! Y/N watch the hair!” 

“You’re a bloody menace you know that?” 

Remus laughed into your neck and squeezed your waist. “Don’t bother with him love, he’s just jealous” Remus grinned at Sirius. 

Sirius only rolled his eyes and tossed back the rest of his drink. “Well, I’m off to find a lovely bloke on the dance floor then.”

James slapped him on the back as he made his way toward the swell of people and music. He turned his gaze to you and Remus and said, “He’s right, you two truly are disgusting.”

“Piss off,” Remus laughed “as if you and your precious Lilyflower aren't any worse.”

“James I believe quite literally last weekend poor Lily had to peel you off of her before you mauled her in front of everyone.” You added. 

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” He waved your comments off, but a smile spread across his cheeks. 

James caught the bartender's attention and ordered you all more drinks. Remus took the opportunity to move his hands to the backs of your thighs and deceitfully run them up toward the hem of your skirt. You hummed at his actions and gripped his shoulders. He nudged his head back to your neck and placed light kisses against your throat. The drinks running through you made his actions all the more intense. 

James spun back around with yours and Remus’ drinks in hand. He handed them to you as he sipped his own. You held your drink to your chest as you watched Remus swallow his. His hand around the glass sent heat through you, imagining what else that hand had done. His other hand remained latched to the back of your thigh and when he caught your gaze he squeezed it. He sent you an all-knowing smirk and raised his glass to his lips again. You blushed and tried to push your sexual thoughts from your head, taking a swig from your drink to help. 

Luckily, James’ attention was now focused on Lily’s dancing form. Remus noticed this too and swiftly moved his hand to the curve of your ass. You glared at him as he smiled up at you. He moved to stand and placed his glass on the bar top. 

“Gonna step out for a smoke, you alright?” He asked James. 

James glanced at you both and nodded, “Yeah might head to the dance floor myself.”

Remus stood to his full height and grabbed your drink from your hands placing it next to his. He reached for your hand and started for the door. You glanced back to see James heading to Lily as Remus pulled you along. 

The night air was bitter and crisp. You squeezed Remus’ hand as the cold air hit you. He continued to pull you around the side of the pub, and only then did he drop your hand. 

He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a cigarette and lighter. He skillfully placed the smoke in his mouth and cupped the lighter as he lit it. You were leaning against the wall as you watched him. When he was sure the thing was lit he inhaled as he pocketed his lighter. He puffed out his smoke and gazed down at you. 

“Your dance moves were cute.” He said.

You reached up and took the cigarette from his lips. You kept steady eye contact as you took your own drag from it and replied, “Thanks”. 

He huffed a laugh at your teasing and placed his arm above your head on the wall. He peeled the cigarette from your lips and placed it back in his. His eyes were roaming your figure and you could feel your body heating up. You shook your head as you looked up at him and gave him a challenging look. 

He took the bait and took one last drag from the joint as he leaned back on his arm and glanced around the corner. As his gaze moved back to you he blew the smoke out. He dropped the cigarette and put it out with his foot. He leaned in close, his mouth centimeters from yours. 

He exhaled, “You want this?”

You looked up into his eyes, “Yes.”

That was all he needed to crash his lips to yours. One hand gripped your waist tightly, while the other moved to hold your neck. You pushed your hands against his chest, guiding them up to his hair. 

You grabbed at each other and quickly his tongue infiltrated your mouth. Your body was pure heat and you rubbed your legs together to get some relief. Remus noticed and moved his hand between your legs. He cupped your sex and you moaned into his mouth. He smiled and moved his fingers into your underwear. 

You gripped his hair as he slid his fingers over your core and gathered your wetness. He rubbed his index and middle finger over your clit and you groaned loudly. 

“Shh. You have to be quiet Y/N.” He whispered.

You nodded your head and moved your arm to hold the back of his neck as he slid those two fingers inside you. He fingered you and you held him as near as possible. Your back arched off the cold wall as his fingers speed up. You moved your hand that wasn't around him to his front and palmed him over his jeans. He hissed in pleasure and kissed your lips. 

He suddenly removed his hand and grabbed your wrist, spinning you against the wall. Your face pressed into it as you heard him remove his belt. You pushed your ass toward him, the wait unbearable. 

“Please”  You moaned. 

“Patience, darling.” He responded.

He aggressively shoved your skirt over your hips and shoved your soaking underwear to the side. You felt his body heat against yours. He rubbed the head of his shaft against you and down to your clit. Your arm went back to hold onto him. 

He pushed his head into your core painfully slow. Your eyes rolled in pleasure as his full length sheathed inside you. 

Once he was fully inside your core he waited a moment. His head was thrown back in pleasure and he gripped you tightly. You glanced over your shoulder as he exhaled and grabbed your waist. He thrusted into you and your hand shot to the wall for balance. 

His pace picked up and you could feel every inch of him. As he slammed into you he moved one hand to grip your hair. The tug on your roots shot more pleasure and sensations through you. The heat radiating off of your bodies contradicted the cold night air. 

Remus pounded into you from behind and you couldn’t help but release a small moan. He was panting and his thursts hit just the right spot. The alcohol in your systems made the situation all the more exhilarating. 

Remus pulled your ass fulsh against him and moved his arm fully around your waist to reach your clit. His other arm moved from your hair to around your neck as he pulled you upright against him. 

His fingers moved skillfully around your bud, and in combination with his rough, heavy thrusts you were close. 

“I’m gonna cum” You mumbled. 

Remus groaned and muttered an “I’m close” as well. 

His fingers sped up around your clit and you could feel the familar tingle of an orgasm. He moaned into your ear and whispered “You’re so tight. You feel so good.”

His affirmations sent you over the edge. Your core squeezed him as you came. His thruts sped up and your quiet moans mixed together. You felt him slam into you and steady. He came and held you as tightly as he could. 

As you both came down from your highs you were panting. Remus pulled out of you and moved your underwear back into place. You spun around in his arms and he pushed the hair from your face as you looked to him. He smiled at you and blushed. He slid his arms down your body and kissed you lightly as he pulled your skirt back over your hips. He adjusted his own self back into his pants and kissed your temple. 

“I think that was our best one yet.” You laughed. 

Remus laughed in return and grabbed your hand. You walked back around the corner smoothing your hair down. As you reentered the pub your friends were all back at the bar. You made your way over and Sirius sent you both a condescending look. 

“Ah. Well look who it is. Have a nice smoke?” He spoke. 

Marlene laughed and Lily playfully hit Sirius. 

“We did yeah, thanks.” Remus smiled. 

You blushed and James laughed at your embarrassment. Remus pulled you into his side and wrapped his arm around you. 

He mumbled into your hair, “This was definitely better than watching a film at home.”

Me when I'm a marauders fan but my fav holiday is Halloween 😭

Sobbing over a bucket of candy reading James Potter fanfiction while the Michael Myers movies I'm supposed to be watching plays in the background

I get hallowen is a sad time for the marauders fandom but a have a happy little headcanon.

Sirius bought countless boxes of Count Chocula to find the 'Count Chocula goes to Hollywood' record. Remus thought it was ridiculous but he couldn't complain about his infinite supply of chocolate cereal.