Quote Of The Day - Blog Posts

"I love you guys, but you cannot get that in baking"

And I wonder, when I sing along with you... if everything could ever feel this real forever... if anything could ever be this good again...

Foo Fighters' "Everlong" (1997)

Maybe I'm just paranoid, or maybe I'm just livin' a lie - Can't stop this screaming voice, or maybe I'm just sick inside.

Skillet's "Psycho in My Head" (2022)

"You take the pain I feel"

-Comatose/Skillet

How can I give you all of me if I’m only half

“Life’s a bitch but it’s all about how you dick her down” -JD<3

Though I feel so human at times, it feels as though there is a fundamental part of being human missing from me. This is where my music begins to become louder in my mind than any other internal thought sensory. I turn to be human towards another, yet at a loss. Then music may come. Or my love burns through velvet blankets and I crave through notes. Such fires and fires put out are equal. Their smoke is the mystery that fills the back rooms with lavender and long trails of endless thought.

Mike Liebo (via mikeliebo)

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10 Ways for Highly Sensitive People To Create New Habits That Stick

May 6, 2019

In my last article, I mentioned the importance of consistency when it comes to practicing new behaviors to cope with emotional overwhelm. (The topic of the post).

In this post, I would like to build upon the topic by sharing some ways I have learned to integrate new behaviors or habits in such a way that improves my persistence. As I have learned over time, persistence is key!

Because I have always struggled with persistence and sticking to rigid routines and mundane tasks, I have had to strive for persistence in a number of ways. I have had to learn about the importance of implementing routines (particularly for HSPs) into a daily schedule.

Implementing daily habits and routines for HSPs can be a necessary component to achieving a sense of security and balance in an overwhelming world.

Building routines can be a great way for HSPs to seek comfort and a gain a sense of knowing what to expect in a world where unexpected things happen. It can also help HSPs maintain greater focus on personal goals/dreams when there are multiple distractions arising from multiple sources. I have learned that it can also help avoid procrastination, which can lead to regret and even more feelings overwhelm.

While routines can be an excellent tool to simplify one's life, I know many highly sensitive people can find change overwhelming. I know from experience that trying to change too many things at once can be overwhelming and be an obstacle to reaching goals. That is one reason I believe starting with small goals and gradually building up to larger goals is more beneficial.

It is important to know that creating new habits can take time and patience. The time it takes to build new habits can depend on the person, the habit, commitment to the habit, and other lifestyle factors. Many people believe it takes approximately one month to create a habit. Others believe it takes more or less time to reach their goals.

It has taken me various amounts of time and effort to create some of my current habits/routines, but I would like to share with you some helpful ways I have gradually created new routines/habits into my schedule. So far, it has helped improve the quality of my life and is helping me reach my goals at a more comfortable pace!

10 Ways to Build New Habits/Routines

1. Determine What You Truly Value and Intend to Create for Your Life

Knowing exactly what you want to achieve and prioritize can help give you a sense of where to start and simplify your goals. Writing down your intentions/goals can help you get more clear about your goals. It may include both long term and short term goals.

2. Start With Small Achievable Goals

This may include starting with one or two simple goals that are realistic and easy to achieve. These goals can be modified over time accordingly. The more the habits are practiced, the more likely it is to continue building upon the smaller goals. i.e. walking 10 minutes a day and gradually increasing the habit over time.

3. Combining a New Habit With Existing Habits

I find that tying new habits/routines to an existing routine is one of the best ways to not only get motivated, but can help with persistance. It is also a real time saver! For example, I started doing 10 jumping jacks after I brush my teeth each day. Over time I not only increased the amount of jumping jacks, but the amount I brush my teeth as well.

4. Using the Cue/Behavior/ Reward Technique

Everyone is different and may prefer different variations of this technique but the concept is the same. There are many sources online that further explain this concept. An example of this concept would be when I could barely get out of bed (let alone) take weekly classes, I chose to buy my favorite coffee drink (reward). The behavior or routine was getting out of bed and going to school. The cue was my alarm going off and the school day being on the schedule. Thankfully, I can attend class regularly without having to buy coffee every time but it did make a difference! Seeking out motivation and inspiration also helps facilitate the practice of a new habit. i.e. music, inspiring speeches etc...

5. Connections and Accountability

As I mentioned in my previous article, being accountable can help increase the chance of completing a task or goal. One way to be accountable is joining a community of people with similar objectives or goals. This can be helpful with motivation and create connections with others. i.e. Joining a fitness community online or in person.

6. Reminders

Having reminders such as visuals, auditory, written, or verbal reminders can be great ways to stay on track. i.e. leaving sticky notes around or using timers to complete tasks and stay on track.

7. Letting Go of Perfectionism

This includes not comparing yourself to others, letting go of "black and white" thinking, and expecting instant results. It's about knowing you may not do it all perfectly but you also don't give up on achieving your goals. I also find that having patience with yourself and the process and accepting that it is not going to be perfect can help with persistency.

8. Track your Progress and Celebrate the Milestones

Tracking your progress can help you see how far you've come to reach your goal. Rewarding yourself for your progress can help reinforce the new routine or habit you want to obtain. Some people use habit trackers or draw chains to keep track of progress. I also find that writing or talking about the progress can be another useful way to keep track of goals.

9.Environment

Similar to a growing plant, the right conditions to grow a new habit can impact the growth process of habit development. It's easier to focus on a goal or task in a comfortable environment. Also, being in a new environment provides new cues to start a new habit. It is about what works for you!

10. Replace a Negative Habit With a New Positive Habit

Much of our behavior is truly based on habits. This includes both positive and negative habits. I believe most people have at least one habit they know is not benefiting them and wish they could quit repeating it. Getting rid of negative habits can be difficult because the mind connects it with some kind of reward. The process of changing the behavior may also include setbacks, time, and may not occur in a linear fashion. There are also triggers or cues in the mind's connections that can trigger the behavior or habit. An example of replacing the negative habit is knowing your triggers or cues for the negative habit and replacing it with a new behavior. i.e. Drinking flavored sparkling water when having the urge to drink soda or alcohol. In this way, new connections can be made and the new habit can be developed over time.

Although most HSPs can be easily overwhelmed when faced with change , incorporating a degree of new healthy routines or replacing negative habits with positive ones can be beneficial. The tips in this article are ten of the ways I have worked toward developing new habits. Hopefully it will help someone achieve their goals and dreams! Feel free to let me know in the comments what works for you!

With Love,

Dahlia

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Heath Ledger was not only an amazing actor but was considered to be a highly sensitive person.

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True Sign of intelligence

There is a rose trapped in a cracked mirror which has been screaming our names at 3 am for days and days…

Ashes to ashes We don't clean the dust But we do what we can And we do what we must....

This is your reminder...

Guilt is temporary but shame lasts as long as you hold on to it. Be strong, grow, and gently let go.

This is your reminder..

This is your reminder to be the change you wish to see in the world. After many centuries of recorded scientific discovery, feats of genius in the artists, theorizing, and education to eradicate the social ignorance that is at the root of inequality amongst billions of individuals of the same kind…the humankind …somehow we have found ourselves in a strange situation that doesn’t quite pay respect to our collective intelligence and capacity to love. In times of sheep and shepherds, the individual is the key to clarity. No one has to give you permission to be an individual. You are preordained and blessed to have the ability to look deep within yourself to discover how you truly feel. You always have the option to do your own research and you should always take advantage of that option even if you feel you are not an expert on any given subject. Your faculties for learning never cease if you never cease to use them…so use them. This concludes your reminder. Enjoy your beautiful life when you can and you can whenever you choose you can.

So true.

Exactly.

“Don’t let life hijack your brain! Life used to hijack my brain all the time! I used to worry about why this person didn’t like me, why that person didn’t text me back, why my girlfriend broke up with me, etc….these types of thoughts consumed me every day. I allowed these things that were beyond my control to hijack my everyday thoughts. All of this negativity followed me all day long. It is up to you to realize that you must fill your brain with goals- be ambitious! Like the body requires the proper nutrition to perform optimally, the brain requires positivity, self-confidence and, most of all, it is up to you to control it. Once that motherfucker gets hijacked, you are doomed! Something or someone controls it and they will take you for a fucking joy ride. Trust me- a lot of people enjoy these mind games and watching you respond like a puppet to their every command. No one wants to fail a test. No one wants to get heartbroken. No one wants to get passed over for the promotion at work. No one wants to feel expendable. But, guess what? That is the world we fucking live in. You must learn to push past every single thing and person that wants to hijack your mind. It is critical that you always have goals in front of you so that those negative things that will happen to you don’t derail you and your plans. Make sure that you are the only one who owns real estate in your mind!”

— David Goggins

I know it will be the death of me. Again. My heart will die a second time when he tells me.

Why is it always me who gets the heartbreak?

I've heard that if a crush lasts longer than 4 months, you're already in love. So what happens when I've been infatuated with you for 60 months, Does this mean I've fallen in love with you 15 times? Or have I simply wasted 5 years? 60 months? 261 weeks? 1825 days?

That one crush