Incorrect Shakespeare Quotes: Much Ado About Nothing 1

Incorrect Shakespeare Quotes: Much Ado About Nothing 1

Benedick: Beatrice, I screwed up, big time.

Beatrice: Benedick, given your daily life experiences, you’re gonna have to be more specific.

*

Benedick: I can't take this anymore, someone needs to take me out!

Beatrice: In a dating type of way, or an assassination type of way?

Benedick: I don't know, surprise me!

*

Beatrice: I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Someone asked me what the Spanish word for "tortilla" was once, and now I dream of kissing them under the moonlight.

Benedick: What kind of animal is the Pink Panther?

Beatrice, already taking off their clothes: God, Benedick, you’re so fucking stupid.

*

Beatrice: Valentine’s day is just a consumerist holiday that holds no real value other than drive people insane buying heart shaped chocolates for their significant others and pos-

Benedick: I wrote you a poem.

Beatrice, already crying: You did?

*

Benedick: Hey, random question, what are your favorite flowers?

Beatrice: Peonies, why?

Benedick:

Beatrice: Were you going to get me flowers?

Benedick:

Beatrice:

Benedick: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ

*

Benedick: Strawberry milk doesn’t taste like strawberry OR milk.

Beatrice: Go the fuck to sleep Benedick.

*

Beatrice: You’re overthinking this.

Benedick: You don’t know the appropriate level of thinking, Beatrice. What if I’m underthinking?

*

Benedick: I have a problem.

Beatrice: Kill it.

Benedick: Can you chill for like, two seconds?

*

Benedick: Anyone down to take couples counseling and see at what point the therapist realizes we barely know each other?

Beatrice: Idiots to lovers, 20k words, angst with a happy ending.

*

Beatrice, laying in bed: Get out of my room.

Benedick, standing just outside of the door frame: I’m not in your room.

*

Beatrice, ordering Starbucks: Hey, I just got my heart broken, what do you recommend?

Benedick, who’s running the drive thru: …

Benedick: Tequila.

*

Beatrice: I don't know how to tell you this, but... I love you.

Benedick: That's great, Beatrice. Especially considering the fact we've been married for 6 fucking years.

*

Beatrice: *standing on a balcony and sneezes*

Benedick: *standing on the roof* Bless you.

Beatrice: God?!

*

Benedick: Do we have any orange juice left?

Beatrice: *pours the remaining juice into their cup*

Beatrice: Sorry, we’re all out.

*

Benedick: Am I right, Beatrice?

Beatrice: I’m almost certain you’re not, but to be fair, I wasn’t listening.

*

Benedick: Hey, Beatrice. What kind of flowers do you prefer?

Beatrice: I like sunflowers.

Benedick, pulling out a bouquet of Venus Flytraps: Well, shit-

*

Benedick: Go fuck yourself.

Beatrice: Come over here and fuck me yourself you coward!

*

Beatrice: Don’t weep for the stupid. You’ll be crying all day.

*

Benedick: Capitalizing every word in a sentence is vomit inducing.

Beatrice: Enjoy Your Trip To Puke Land, Boy!

*

Beatrice: Benedick, can I ask you a question?

Benedick: Sure, anything.

Beatrice: Why don't you go back to your own house and leave us alone?

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Adobe is going to spy on your projects. This is insane.

Photoshop’s new terms of service require users to grant Adobe access to their active projects for “content moderation” and other purposes pic.twitter.com/weRjMfWvxx

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2 years ago
Noah’s “judge My Wife If You Dare” Look Is Severely Underrated. It’s So Beautiful That He Loves

Noah’s “judge my wife if you dare” look is severely underrated. It’s so beautiful that he loves her so much even though everyone else thinks she’s weird. He sees the sweet, generous, thoughtful woman that Astrid is. Religion, the opinions of others, having children, none of it matters because he just loves her.


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2 years ago

Okay, the third installment of “Domestic Burlesque” is up! I’m insanely excited about how chapter 5 turned out. Please check it out and let me know what you think!

archiveofourown.org
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

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2 years ago

TMMM Series Finale Review:

- Midge…WHY DIDN’T YOU JUST GO TALK TO LENNY?!?!

- I love Abe

- Stop cutting to Joel!

- Aww Susie!

- Aww Rose!

- Chinese Restaurant Scene broke me and she keeps the Fortune!!!

- The ending with Midge and Susie is great

- This is still a disappointing season overall.


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2 months ago

Your comments about AI users being talentless tells me you don't really understand art. It's about the product, not the tools. You can waste your life learning how to use a thousand of brushes and programs and you'll be easily outshone by someone who uses AI to draw what they want. The 'talentless' usually crow on about techniques and tools and miss the point of making art.

"You can waste your life learning how to use a thousand brushes and programs" And there, this is the attitude of the non-artists-AI-lovers in a nutshell. You see, drawing artists like using brushes. "Someone who uses AI to draw what they want."

No. If you instruct the AI to do something, you aren't 'drawing' anything. "The talentless" The 'talentless' is you. Telling an AI what image you want to be drawn doesn't require any talent.

2 years ago

I watched the first three episodes of Marvelous Mrs. Maisel season 5.

I…Eh…

First of all, where is the Gaslight? We haven’t seen it in so long.

Second, I’m sad to see that there’s still a lack of long stand-up performances…in this show about a comedienne. This was a problem in season 4, and I hope they fix it as S5 goes on.

I’m so glad season 4 Midge is mostly gone. I hated how insufferable she was in Season 4 and that Susie was never able to get through to her. That’s the core of their relationship, and I don’t like that it took so long for her to get over herself.

The flash forward openings were…weird. On one hand, Miriam being kind of an absentee mother makes some sort of sense, but seeing her as another version of Rose is kind of disappointing.

As is the reveal that she’s apparently been married four more times. Like, why can’t she find happiness? I never liked the arc about ending up alone, but I was willing to accept it as Midge putting romantic relationships on hold for a bit after putting it ahead of everything for so long.

But apparently she no longer speaks to Susie either? I HATE the explanation they give too. Their whole “we’re not friends, we’re coworkers” finished midway through the second season, and was a huge and endearing bit of Susie’s growth. I’m sure they’ll expand on it, but it’s just sad. And they showed the inverse of it mostly effectively in Season 3.

I hate that this show seems to really be doubling down on its message of “you have to be alone and distant from literally anyone to achieve your dreams.”

Season 1 and Season 2 (barring the finale) were about finding personal growth by pursuing your own ambitions.

Season 3, which I didn’t enjoy as much, is where the “ending up alone to succeed” stuff really started after being seeded in the Season 2 finale. Yeah, it’s hinted at in the S2 premiere, but it’s more about the final end of Midge and Joel specifically. The plot line with Ben is also more about Midge opening up with a potential romantic partner, and how perhaps she isn’t ready or compatible with someone in that moment enough to settle down.

She’s only about a year out from her divorce, so it makes sense that she realizes that she isn’t ready to settle down again.

I don’t really get why she decided that one failed relationship automatically equals alone forever. I guess it’s because she’s also super influenced by Lenny’s performance, but…that’s another problem. Her idolization of him is just such a weird step in the wrong direction for her character.

She’s putting him on a pedestal the same way she did with Joel, and it’s him that is the one to get her out of her self-destructive phase.

Susie once told her “You do not need a … man at your side to do this”. Except she does.

I hate some of the messaging in this show, but hopefully the final episodes will make up for the stuff I didn’t like just like the Lenny and Midge blue room scene did last season.


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1 year ago

Aziraphale’s Possible Reasoning in the Final Scene

Season 2 Spoilers Below!

Okay, unpopular opinion, but I kind of understand why Aziraphale may think Crowley would want to be an angel again, if we put aside the queer allegory of conformity for a moment.

Aziraphale probably remembers the first time he met Crowley (then Rafael) when Crowley was building the stars. Crowley had such a look of genuine joy and wonder on his face.

Aziraphale thinks he is being kind. Obviously, yes he still wants to fix Heaven, which is a futile pipe dream.

But, Aziraphale wants to give Crowley the stars again, and he thinks bringing him back to heaven is the only way to do that.

Aziraphale wants to save Crowley from an existence of eternal damnation. To forever protect Crowley from Hell which he sees as the only source of evil and torture. He still has his blinders on and doesn’t realize this about Heaven.

He just doesn’t realize that Crowley doesn’t need the stars and he doesn’t need saving.

At least that’s what I’m telling myself to cope.


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1 year ago

Incorrect Shakespeare Quotes: Much Ado About Nothing 3

Beatrice : I have very high standards, you know.

Benedick : I can make spaghetti...

Beatrice : Oh no! You're meeting all my standards!

Benedick : *on the phone* Hey Beatrice , do you know my blood type?

Beatrice : Of course, it's B negative.

Benedick : Oh, I guessed wrong. Excuse me, nurse-!

*Benedick and Beatrice are in Paris.*

Benedick : I'm...moved. I...I don't know what it is I'm feeling right now. I feel...destiny?

Beatrice : But...

Benedick : I don't know what it is. I feel like... I just never thought I'd see it with my own two eyes. And here it is. It's just there. It's right in front of me, and...

Beatrice : This is what you wanted to see? The bridge from Inception?

Benedick : Yeah.

Beatrice : But the Eiffel Tower is behind us, babe.

Benedick : Yeah, but this is the bridge FROM INCEPTION.

Beatrice : Okay, alright.

Benedick : Wait you like me? For my personality?

Beatrice : I know, I was surprised too.

Benedick , looking over Beatrice ’s shoulder: You can draw?

Beatrice , stopping what they were doing: You can speak?

Beatrice : BEHOLD, the field in which I grow my fucks! Lay thine eyes upon it, and thou shalt see that it is barren!

Benedick : Can I ask a dumb question?

Beatrice : Better than anyone I know.

Benedick : What are you eating?

Beatrice : You wouldn't like it, it's really salty.

Benedick : I like you, don't I?

Beatrice : I can’t believe all these people are wearing black. black is supposed to be my thing, they’re all just posers.

Benedick : Beatrice, for the last time, we’re at a funeral.

Beatrice, to Benedick: Are you peanuts? Because I want to boil you alive.

Benedick : Guess what I'm about to get!

Beatrice : On my nerves.

Beatrice : What are you doing here?

Benedick : I could ask you the same question.

Beatrice : I live here. This is my house.

Benedick : I should probably ask you a different question.

Benedick : I am so cool. I am an absolute Chad. I am the epitome of coolness and awesomeness—

Beatrice : Hi.

Benedick : *melts down in a flustered heap of softness*

Benedick : Beatrice is playing hard to get.

Benedick : Little do they know, I'm a master at playing hard to get rid of.

Hairdresser: How would you like your hair cut?

Beatrice : Preferably with scissors, but a sword could be badass.

Benedick : I'm going to take a shower, I'll be right back.

Beatrice : Why are you telling me this, I don't care.

Beatrice , right after Benedick leaves the room: I miss them already.

Benedick : Beatrice , I sense hostility.

Beatrice : Good, because I hate you.

Benedick : Are you busy?

Beatrice : Yes.

Benedick : Cool, listen to this...

Beatrice : Can I ask you for a favor?

Benedick : I would literally die for you, but continue.

Beatrice : We need to talk about you starting sentences that way.

Beatrice : You are an absolute fucking dork.

Benedick , singing: Yeah, but I'm your dork!

Beatrice : *sighs* Yeah, you're my dork.

Benedick , admiring a sleeping Beatrice : You’re so cute.

Beatrice , sleepily: I could beat your ass.

Benedick , lovingly: I know.

Benedick : Met a dumbass today. Awful.

Beatrice : You looked in a mirror?

Benedick : someday you will have to answer for your actions and god may not be so merciful.

Benedick: They don’t make them like me no more. I’m the last of my kind.

Beatrice: Thank god.

Benedick: Are we fighting or flirting?

Beatrice: I'm pinning you against a wall with my hand around your neck-

Benedick: Your point?

Beatrice: I can’t believe we have to be stuck in this room together!

Benedick, swallowing the key: Truly unfortunate.

Benedick: We all have our demons.

Benedick, grabbing Beatrice: This one’s mine.

Benedick: Could you be anymore annoying?

Beatrice: Yes.

Benedick: This date is boring!

Beatrice: This isn't a date. I said I was going to the store.

Benedick: Then why did you invite me?

Beatrice: I didnt, I specifically said "don't come with me," then you said, "fuck you Beatrice I'll do whatever I want!

Benedick: Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm?

Beatrice: If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.


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2 months ago

Things I've learned about gen-ai while stealing and re-drawing over screenshots I've found over the last week:

A single prompt uses about 500ml of water... with thousands of new prompts made every second... holy fucking shit.

It doesn't follow a single rule of art. No rule of thirds, no guiding lines, no colour theory... it's uncomfortable because lacks any kind of human perspective on what constitutes art & connection.

About 20% or more of your daily feed includes some kind of AI garbage that doesn't do anything to improve your experience. It doesn't need to be there.

It fuckin' sucks.

1 year ago

Church on Ruby Road

Vs

Okay… I liked that!

There were so many better, more organic ways to introduce Ruby’s search for answers about her bio family then that awkward time skip/ clip show. It could have just been two days. But that interview is just such a blatant excuse to dump her name, age, education level, the fact that she

Because here’s the thing…everything I liked about Ruby, I learned watching her go about her life. I liked watching her with her friends, be a real person. All of the other character work happened once she got to the house and I watched her with her mom and Cherry. We learn very naturally that she’s looking for her bio family, that she’s upset about not getting answers, but also is clearly happy with her family as it is. Her reaction throughout the entire kidnapping is weird, there’s not enough urgency on her behalf.

The gloves are cool? Like in theory, they’re cool, but I do think they get a bit marvel-ish at the end.n

The goblin ship design and interior set are cool, just doesn’t feel very Doctor Who. I like the explanation of how the goblins work though.

Doctor, I have seen you untie ropes with your sonic.

“I am learning the vocabulary of rope!”

The goblins are kinda unthreatening, they just let the Doctor and Ruby stand there. The goblins look good though, they did a good job combining practical and digital effects.

I wish that maybe Ruby felt guilty for being distracted that Lulubelle was kidnapped, (not that she should feel guilty, it would just give more emotional depth to her).

At first I didn’t like how rushed Ruby’s disappearance is, but I think it gives more disorientation to the episode. I love the lighting switch, how everything becomes desaturated. It’s very subtle and I didn’t notice it the first time. Carla’s sudden switch is horrifying.

The Doctor’s tears…I love how much compassion he has. This is the Doctor I love, that I’ve missed. I do wish that he and Ruby had gotten a quieter moment to bond, just to make this feel a little more desperate, and the reunion even sweeter.

The episode does feel like it has two climaxes, Lulubelle’s rescue and baby Ruby’s rescue. The rescue of Ruby does feel rushed and I still don’t understand the crack in the ceiling or why the ship just disappears.

Okay…Ruby Sunday. Millie Gibson is really fun. Her dramatic moments are also really well-acted. But…I was really hoping we’d be going back to the type of companion that’s just a person. Like Rory, Rose, Donna, Martha, and Bill. They all have extraordinary things happen to them yes, but they aren’t introduced as mysteries. That’s my least favorite type of companion, because their character is always secondary to the plot. And, I’m going to be honest, I don’t care who Ruby’s parents are. But…oh well.

I do love the scene of Ruby piecing together that the Doctor is a time traveller, and she just thinks that’s cool and wants to go see it, but like…most companions are like that to some degree. At least she has a family though, which is one of my favorite parts of companion stories.

Mrs. Flood could be a cool mystery.

Alright…Ncuti Gatwa is tied with my beloved Ninth doctor. He’s fun and flirty and heroic and empathetic. His theme music rocks. He can do angsty moments really well. I like how the Timeless child is being handled.

All in all, I’m excited for what’s coming.


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Angel With a Wand

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