When It Comes To Mission Reports, Damian Is The Epitome Of Not Showing Your Work.

Thinking about time travel, as one does, and more specifically, what the funniest/worst point possible it would be for ol’ mr infinte sadness to time travel from. And honestly, I think the best/worst point, in terms of ‘angst and confusion for your buck’ point, would be approximately 0.5 seconds after order 66 goes out. He’s just killed Grievous. The war isn’t over, but it’s, y’know, at a turning point! Dooku is dead! Grievous is now dead! we’re at the clean up point, a few more months of mop up, and then the republic is SAVED. And then his men fire on him, every Jedi in existence is suddenly dying, and Obi-wan has no fucking idea what just happened. Yeeting him back through time at that point? hilarious. Pure comedy.

The information he does have, at that point, is mostly either hyper specific – the war, etc – or completely fucking useless – the war, etc – given the whole time travel change the future etc trope, he is traumatized as fuck from three years of said war and also the wave of inexplicable death, and also, for some reason, all the clones tried to kill him????

many questions to ask, zero answers available, all he knows is there’s Some Number Of Sith out there in the galaxy, but crucially, he only knows where one (1) of them is at any given time, and there’s a good few decades where he doesn’t know where any of them are!!

He knows who the supreme chancellor will eventually be if palp’s is not already elected, but he does not know the dude is a Sith; he knows maul exists but unless he drops back in the, like, week that TPM happens he has no clue where maul is; and Dooku is either part of the order, or fucking about as a count, which is not actually illegal.

Kamino exists and Obi-wan knows where that is, but the clones are either Not Yet Made, or they’re, like, Babies. Babies who grow up to shoot him off a cliff for ??????????? reasons. Even Anakin! Anakin is either born, and……maybe on tatoonie, or already part of the order, but at that point, Obi-wan does not yet know that Anakin went Full Baby Murder Breakdown Stagename!! He doesn’t know about the twins! he is about as clueless as it is possible for a time traveler to be and still be a main character! anyway I just think it would be fucking hilarious for him to be shot off the cliffside on utapau, land in the council room circa TPM or even earlier, and then have to be like “terrible things are going to happen also I cannot explain literally any of the reasons, I just lived it and have no idea why anything happens, trust me anyway!”

“also there are sith. sith are real. again.”

(I’m tired and feeling whimsical and have another au)

AU where the Clones have existed almost as long as the Jedi and are basically the Jedi version of Hogwart’s letters. They feel a pull and go out and find their Jedi, unless their Jedi were already found in Search and there for they grow up together

- Obi Wan is never kicked out in this verse because as much as he can’t find a Master, Cody is adamant This Is My Jedi so if Obi Wan goes, he does to (or maybe they both leave)

- when Qui Gon finds Anakin on Tatooine, he’s already been found, by a rebellious Clone who left the Order because Fuck This Shit. His name is Jango

OR!!!!

Jango was Dooku’s clone trooper and they had a serious falling out. Jango recognizes Anakin as a possible Jedi and sticks around to keep the kid safe. Anakin’s Clone Trooper can be either Rex or Fives

- no chips this time, Palpy uses some other means to attempt to neutralize the troopers

i kid you not, these are my notes from yesterday's bio class

Fanfic about the scene of Erik killing Shawn on the beach, with any consequences for Charles - angst, but with a happy ending. Please.

Tim and Jason are currently in a tentative truce/alliance, and despite their history their loyalty to this truce is locked the fuck down. they REFUSE to wrong the other or partake in any kinda shenanigan bullshit that could effect the other, to the point where while at first the others were just relieved the two were bonding after their colourful first start, at this point they’re just concerned about the closeness of the two most feral members of the family; wondering if this alliance should be something to fear.

the reason for this alliance, is because both Tim and Jason realised very shortly after coming into contact with each other that neither of them has any sense of self control when it comes to being spiteful or petty. Jason has had 90% of his will to give a fuck and his self preservation stripped away from him via Lazarus pit and the other 10% clearly didn’t exist anyway(see: stealing Batman’s tires and hitting him with a tire iron when caught). Tim meanwhile is completely feral regardless; he had to have no boundaries to survive with less-than-present parents and surviving a grieving Bruce’s version of Robin-training. plus the whole business with the LOA and Ra’s? his sense of escalation got lost in the fray years ago.

the issue with this, the two found out shortly after Jason first started interacting with the kid, is that them fighting in any way starts to become like a pushing-two-magnets situation. neither of them have ever come across somebody with as little sense of control as they have, so neither of them ever consider backing down from any kind of battle or feud. they find the dangers of this when Jason trips Tim in the hall and within 12 hours it’s escalated to Tim shooting a bazooka into Jason’s favourite safe house while Jason sets fire to Drake manor, framing Tim for insurance fraud in the process.

any kind of battle of spite between the two has no visible end, and it wont even occur to either of them for a second to back down or apologise, simply because fuck it amiright?

Alfred finds them one day in the kitchen engaging in a ‘water fight’ with special metal water-guns that spew acid. Jason has been stabbed at some point, and is bleeding onto the floor. He only seems to recognise this injury in the perimeters of using it against Tim by swiping the blood across the floor to make him slip. Tim has barbed wire in his hair and a clearly dislocated shoulder but he’s ice skating in that blood towards Jason without a single beat missed. Alfred gets them to stop specifically to clean up his goddam kitchen, and, while they guiltily clean, he finds out the root cause of this fight.

the night before, Tim stole Jason’s pencil. that’s it.

slightly terrified for the well-being on his grandsons, he spends the rest of the day acting as a peace-maker/lawyer to draft up an ‘alliance contract’ between the two, knowing that the only way to keep them safe from both themselves and each other is to make them a team, forever and unbreakably loyal towards each other. it takes a sleepless night to draft up all the details but he convinces the two to sign it, making it both a bat-pact, a blood-pact, and a legal document. it is the most important document in the manor, and Alfred hides it in his own personal quarters just to ensure it is kept safe.

because of the contract Jason and Tim are no longer allowed to engage in any kind of fight. any kind of disagreement, no matter how little, must be brought to Alfred, something he knows he’ll lose sleep over but at least Tim and Jason will be safe- it also gives them incentive to compromise with each other because if they don’t then one of them will have to wake Alfred up in the middle of the night just to ask which one of them gets the last of the cereal. they have to become a duo, loyal to each other first and foremost and always reliable enough that the other can turn to them in need. it becomes a very serious deal, and after realising the danger their fights could potentially put the family in(Tim tried to poison Jason’s food once but failed to account for Dick stealing Jason’s food like a normal big brother would), they decide they need to take this alliance up with the upmost sincerity.

for the good of Gotham.

nobody else in the family is sure as to why the fuck ‘team red’ suddenly became such a constant rock-hard alliance between the two brothers, but Alfred has never been more relieved.

I lost track of that one post about the clones passive aggressively wearing the names of individuals they hate during the war and then proceeding to associate that name with a bunch of stupidity, but

Reblog if you honestly have NEVER sent anon hate.

It pains me that only 14,000 people can honestly reblog this

When I'm liking your vent post just know that I'm kneeling with my sword to offer you support.

Roy: Damnit, I cut my finger

Jason: Want me to kiss it better?

Roy: That works?

Jason: Yeah, my mom used to do it when I was little

*later* Roy: I need you to punch me in the mouth

Artemis Fucking finally

The Lion King: It is impossible to CGI photorealistic lions who can also emote!

Chronicles of Narnia: