Dc Captain Marvel - Blog Posts

Back with another list for you guys!!!

Weird things Captain Marvel has done

Carved his entire mission report into a slab of stone for Batman

Sat on the couch in the Watchtower rec room without moving or blinking for 2 hours straight before going home whistling

Tried to lick the sun cause he was curious what it would taste like

Carried a child (Freddy) on his shoulders for an entire mission

Wore a top hat for a day and when asked about it was very confused about why he was wearing a top hat

Fell asleep in space for 5 hours, just floating around (he only woke up when he bumped into the moon)

Sweat an actual, real bullet

Swallowed a bag of chips whole (like, he didn’t even open it up)

Accidentally turned his hair into cotton candy then absentmindedly ate it (bald Cap became a meme)

Didn’t have have his lower body for a week and didn’t say why (like, from the waist down it was just fucking gone)

Currently thinking about Captain Marvel having to take a phone call with the JL in the room

Captain Marvel: “I’m with the JL right now, what do you want??”

Capt Marvel: “what do you mean Mary has a machine gun???”

Capt Marvel: “she did what? No, you can’t do the same, Freddy!”

Capt Marvel: “because it’s ILLEGAL”

Capt Marvel: “bringing Dudley does NOT make it better!”

Capt Marvel: “yes, I know I did the same thing, but that was YESTERDAY. I’m a new man, Freddy!”

Capt Marvel: “mhm, okay fine, just don’t get caught and you have to share when I’m home”

Capt Marvel, ending the call: “okay, bye, see you soon”

JL, staring at him: “…”

Capt Marvel: “What?”

I need a fic where Captain Marvel’s identity is found out and after a lot of arguing and debating, the Justice League is like “okay fine, you can be a hero as long as you have your parents’ permission”

And Billy homeless-orphan Batson, has to jump through hoops to convince all the adults that he has parents and they are fine with him being a hero

Fanfic writers PLEASE!!! I need Billy to have a situation like Tim drake when he had a fake uncle!

I feel like Mary would be the one to give a shovel talk if Billy ever got a romantical partner (not likely cause aroace billy for the win!)

Like, I want her to be the protective one. Let her be the one to stand behind Billy and menacingly glare at whoever is being slightly rude.

Headcanon that Billy doesn’t say “I swear to god” or any variation of that cause if he says that and then breaks the promise, the gods in his head won’t stop nagging him about it until he fixes it

Do new members of the DC Captain Marvel fandom know that the concept of Thavma is mainly fanon? No? Okay, nobody tell them it’ll be so funny

Scenario where Mr. Mind forgets his voice amplifier and when he stands in front of Billy about to monologue, Billy doesn’t notice him and just steps on Mr. Mind, killing him.

So like a few months later, Billy’s just wondering if Mr. Mind retired cause he hasn’t shown up recently.

Tags from @zorilleerrant

This is the perfect addition

Don’t get me wrong, I love content where the Justice League don’t know Billy’s identity and all the shenanigans that come with that!

But something about the JL just causally knowing they have a 14 year old on their team fighting universal threats and being okay with that is so funny to me

Scenario where Billy is the Champion of Magic as usual, but he knows absolutely NOTHING about magic cause the wizard just died after giving him powers.

So all the JLD members are freaking out once they find out the dude —who can make or break their careers in magic— knows fuck-all about it!

Cue shenanigans where all the magic users are trying to teach a god stuff he should know by default.

Don’t get me wrong, I love content where the Justice League don’t know Billy’s identity and all the shenanigans that come with that!

But something about the JL just causally knowing they have a 14 year old on their team fighting universal threats and being okay with that is so funny to me

Idk where this thought came from butttt….

Batman entering Fawcett only to see Captain Marvel Jr and Mary Marvel screaming the lyrics of the Duck Song into the ears of a somehow asleep Captain Marvel on the floor.

Batman turns around and leaves after seeing that

You know the Billy Batson brain rot is strong when bully starts auto correcting to Billy

One day he just drops out of the sky fast asleep during the Justice League fighting a threat and later that day they have to send out a public statement that “Captain Marvel is not dead, one of his patrons just will sometimes pull his blessing from Marvel so he will sleep”

Billy is not happy about his lack-of-sleep being leaked to the public cause now Fawcett heroes and civilians regularly check in to make sure he’s sleeping.

Thinking about a scenario where, for whatever reason, Atlas has to pull his blessing from Captain Marvel for a little bit and Cap doesn’t know about it until it happens.

Like, he’s at a Justice League meeting, and suddenly he’s so tired and he just falls asleep on the spot.

So the JL hear a giant thud and look over so see Captain Marvel gone limp face down on the table.

And he looks dead. It doesn’t help that he doesn’t need to breathe in his marvel form so he isn’t breathing.

Cue the freak out.

Y’know the classic “Billy de-transforms from Captain Marvel back into Billy and the JL think he’s been de-aged so Billy has to pretend to be from ancient times” thing?

I want someone to write that but with Captain Marvel and Billy being separate people like they are in the old comics.

So it’s just Billy either not knowing shit about how to act like a young Cap or Billy not giving a fuck about acting and just him leaving the JL really confused about how Cap was like this when he was young.

Thinking about a scenario where, for whatever reason, Atlas has to pull his blessing from Captain Marvel for a little bit and Cap doesn’t know about it until it happens.

Like, he’s at a Justice League meeting, and suddenly he’s so tired and he just falls asleep on the spot.

So the JL hear a giant thud and look over so see Captain Marvel gone limp face down on the table.

And he looks dead. It doesn’t help that he doesn’t need to breathe in his marvel form so he isn’t breathing.

Cue the freak out.

Thinking about Mary Marvel picking up Captain Marvel (Billy Batson) from Justice League missions/meetings like she’s picking him up from school. And I’m not talking the N52 Mary where’s she’s much older than Billy, I’m talking TWIN Mary!

Mary Marvel: “sooo, how was it? Make any new friends?”

Captain Marvel: “yeah! And I met superman!!!”

Mary Marvel: “that’s nice Billy”

I think one of my favourite things about the fandom is that when someone writes Billy saying “oh my god” they usually replace it with “oh my gods”.

Cause that kid knows for a FACT that there is more than one god because multiple are currently arguing in his head.

These lists are so fun to make

Things Billy has said when a JL member found him walking around as a child in the Watchtower (you decide which excuses worked and which didn’t)

“I’m Batman’s new Robin” (the blue eyes, black hair, and orphan status convinces everyone worryingly fast.)

“Im checking to see if this building’s up to code!” He had a fake mustache and a clipboard too.

“My class is here on a field trip and I got lost :(“

“Let me call my lawyer then we’ll talk!”

“Dude, did you really forget me? We’ve been working together for years!” (It isn’t gaslighting if it’s technically true)

Points behind them “OhMyGosh! A ghost!” Runs away when they look behind them.

“What am I doing here? What are YOU doing here!?”

“SIR/MA’AM, I AM HERE ON OFFICAL BUSINESS™️. PLEASE STEP AWAY AND LET ME DO MY JOB”

“Hi! I’m the Whiz Kid here to do an interview with Cap!”

“You can see me?”

“Excuse me, this is private property and you should NOT be here!”

Says Shazam and turns back into Cap “no one will ever believe you…”

Tawky Tawny, walking past another tiger that was quite rude to him once: *starts very obviously showing off his opposable thumbs*

The tiger: 🤬

Scenario where Billy loses one of his last baby teeth but it transfers over to Captain Marvel.

So everyone in the JL is freaking out cause they thought Cap was almost indestructible! So how on earth did his tooth get knocked out?

And when they ask him what happened, he says he bit into an apple and it came out (completely true). But of course none of the JL believe him and they just assume he isn’t telling them the truth cause he doesn’t want to worry them.

And then one day when Captain Marvel flashes another one of his signature megawatt smiles, they see that in the gap of his missing tooth… A NEW ONE IS GROWING IN????

Okay, we all love Billy Batson saying stuff like “mr Batman sir” & “miss Wonder Woman” but hear me out when I say the whole Marvel trio do it too.

Like, Mary is fidgeting nervously in front of Black Canary and saying “Ms Canary, ma’am, uh- really nice to meet you!”

Freddy is sweating bullets and stuttering in utter fanboy in front of superman like, “Omg! Mr superman sir!”

And all the superheroes are hit with the nostalgia of how Captain Marvel acted exactly like them before he got comfortable with the JL. And they are all like, “yep, they are definitely related to Cap”

WAITWAITWAIT- HERE ME OUT

Rosa and Victor Vasquez going out in public but they have to put leashes on all the kids cause there are so many and someone’s always trying to run off

VOTE BILLY!!! HE HAS PRETENDED TO BE HIS OWN UNCLE IN ORDER TO DO STUFF AND THAT CHILD WAS HOMELESS SO NO WAY IS HE PAYING ANY SORT OF TAXES

I love making these lists and I can’t stop

Things I think the Marvel Trio (Captain Marvel, Mary Marvel & Capt Marvel Jr) have done in front of other heroes that prove they are all siblings.

(Yes I know most of these are more argument-based but these are all sibling moments and if I think of anything wholesome I’ll make another list.)

Cap yanked off Mary’s cape and ran for it with her in hot pursuit.

Jr & Cap kicked each other under the table for half a hour straight during a hero meeting.

Mary put Jr in a headlock and dragged him around.

Jr & Mary duck taped Cap to the watchtower cafeteria ceiling.

All three kept blowing raspberries at each other during a big fight against a supervillain

Cap & Jr both kept making fart noises every time Mary took a step.

All three showed up to a mission with ice creams smooshed on their heads and glares being thrown between the three of them.

Cap & Jr were put in the Get Along Shirt.

Mary & Cap were put in the Get Along Shirt.

Jr & Mary were put in the Get Along Shirt.

All three were put in the Get Along Shirt by a grumpy Batman.

Mary threw Jr into the sun after an argument (he’s fine.)

Headcanons on how the Marvel trio blink cause they are hijacking my brain and holding hostages.

Captain Marvel: frog blinks (no thoughts behind his eyes)

Mary Marvel: doesn’t blink (staring into your soul as she pulls out her bazooka)

Captain Marvel Jr: rapid blinking (its Morse code but he only knows half the alphabet and he’s guessing the other half so it’s just gibberish)

Headcanon that whenever somebody in the Marvel Trio says something stupid another Marvel smacks their head and says “get outta there, Mr Mind!” And only other heroes from Fawcett understand it.

It would be such a cute inside joke that confuses every other hero.

Another list let’s goooo!!!

Things I think Captain Marvel has let slip in conversation unprompted that have concerned others.

“When I was a kid I threw a brick at a cop car” (by kid he means yesterday)

“You act like my uncle after a beer”

“This reminds me of the time somebody tried to run me over with their car back when I was a kid!” (Again, by kid he means yesterday)

“My sister is basically legally dead.”

“I’ve eaten rat meat before!”

“Have you ever been chased out of a store with a broom cause somebody thought you stole a gift card? No? Yeah, me neither.”

“I fight a lot of nazis.”

“Sometimes the gods in my head tell me to kill somebody to set an example :(“

“Mary Marvel got angry at Junior again and she threw him into the sun. He’s fine... I think.”

“There’s this green worm that tries to crawl into people’s ears and mind control them.”

“I found a baby in a dumpster once!”

“I don’t think I have organs.”

After Captain Marvel’s revealed to be a 14 year old boy and once everyone’s gotten over it, the short jokes are gonna be endless.

Cause they go from straining their necks looking up at this over 8ft tall dude to having to look down at this scrawny short kid.

So yeah, Billy’s never gonna escape the short jokes cause that kid isn’t growing up to be taller than 5’11, and 5’11 is at BEST.

Post Captain Marvel identity reveal some of the other JL members try to go into Fawcett to check on Billy (cuz he’s a literal child superhero) and Billy has to chase them out like someone shooing away raccoons from their rubbish bins.

Captain Marvel (Shazam) AU where Billy thinks the JL knows his identity so he’ll just walk around the Watchtower as Billy. So others see this random kid and —in all the wisdom of the smartest heroes in the world— they assume he’s just a ghost haunting the place.

Cue identity shenanigans