Chongyun: Oh, Auntie. You’re Late

Hua Cheng: i hate-

Xie Lian: good morning, san lang!

Hua Cheng: i’m done hating. today is love 💞

Childe: just gonna start killing people i don’t find funny

Scaramouche: national suicide prevention hotline

Childe: shut the fuck up

Traveler, about Scaramouche: i can fix him

Childe: yeah? well i can accept him as he is. you don’t like the murder? grow up. the atrocities are part of him and i’ve decided they’re funny.

no one:

Sole Survivor:

YOUR THOUGHTS?

Percy: Are you the little spoon or the big spoon?

Nico: I’m a knife.

Will: He’s the little spoon.

Xingqiu: you get turned back into a baby but retain all your skills and memory, what do you do?

Razor: eat a nickel

Xingqiu: a reminder: you have retained all your skills and memory

Razor: eat a nickel

Xingqiu: ok

Childe: YEAH SONNNNNNN

Zhongli: daddy

Childe: what the fuck

Zhongli: you called me son and i panicked

Leviathan: just found out that people eat fish, what the actual fuck, what the fuck you guys

Leviathan: actually on second thought that’s kinda hot

Satan: please give it a third thought

Childe: i hope you get run over

Scaramouche: hoping is all well and good, but ultimately, it gets you nowhere. be the change you wish to see in the world. get in your car and run me the fuck down instead of waiting for others to do your work for you, you coward. you lazy fool.

Childe: once i master the bow it’s over for you bitches