Venti, In Fontaine: Ah Yes!baguettes, The Snakes Of Bread. We’ll Take Two Of Your Freshest Yeasty Eels,

Fatui gift exchange

Scaramouche: okay so if anyone draws their own name, we’ll all draw again

Dottore: cool

Signora: okay

Childe: what if we draw someone else’s name?

Dottore: that’s fine right? yeah

Scaramouche: that’s good, that’s what we want

Signora: what if we pick someone that we don’t like?

Childe: it’s just the four of us. do you dislike one of the four of us?

Signora: no no no. *nods her head and points to childe*

Childe: …what if we pick someone who we don’t know?

Signora: yeah what if we get a slip and it’s like Albedo Krendinprinz from Mondstat?

Scaramouche: that will not happen

Dottore: how can you be sure though?

Signora: i like Albedo well enough i just would have no idea what to get him for a gift

Scaramouche: okay so there’s only four names and it’s our four names so everyone just pick one and-

Signora: i’m worried that if i get Albedo the wrong thing, he’ll think that i’m a loser

Childe: aw really? you’re worried about that?

Signora: i’m serious i’m nervous about it

Childe: i’m sure you’ll get him the perfect thing

Signora: thanks that means a lot

Childe: i wouldn’t say it if i didn’t mean it

Scaramouche: does everyone have a slip? did anyone pick themself?

Signora: i got Childe

Scaramouche: no don’t-

Childe: i got Dottore

Dottore: guys! it’s suppose to be secret

Scaramouche: thank you!

Dottore: you’re not suppose to look at the name

Childe: ohhh

Scaramouche: well you’re allowed to- you can read your own slip

Dottore: oh. okay i got Scaramouche

Scaramouche: dude

Signora: i wish i would’ve gotten Scaramouche

Childe: what the hell?!

Signora: i don’t know if this is coming together

Dottore: i’m probably just going to get a gift for Albedo Krendinprinz from Mondstat to be safe

Childe: since my slip says Dottore does that mean he’s the one who helps me figure out what to get Albedo Krendinprinz from Mondstat?

Diluc: do you ever think before you speak

Venti: yea i think “ha ha that’s funny” and then i say it

N being in constant pain during M's romance is SS tier

Diavolo: it’s understandable, no one is judging you. lucifer is strong and mysterious, but sort of compact and well muscled

Barbatos: i’m not in love with lucifer but i’m starting to think you might be

Deacon: if you want to know who your real friends are, get pregnant, those who stick by you are the real ones

Curie: I feel as though there are steps you could take beforehand

Daniel: I’m at this fake ass campsite with all these fake ass people

Cassidy: hey

Daniel: hey!

Daniel: fuckin bitch

Asmodeus: remember to drink water babes!

Mammon: no

Asmodeus: then become the dirt i walk on

Childe: vibe check test came back negative :(

Kaeya: 6/10. the joke hits but it’s not that funny

Childe: what the fuck

Zhongli: 0/10. no dragons

Childe: i’m right fucking here

Childe: i just killed your entire family for not paying the fatui back

Some Random Person: what..? i live alone?

Childe: what?

Childe: then who were the people in your house?

Some Random Person: there’s people in my house???

Childe: well not anymore

Childe: just gonna start killing people i don’t find funny

Scaramouche: national suicide prevention hotline

Childe: shut the fuck up