Alan Lee’s Illustration Of Rhiannon From The Mabinogion

Obscure Arthurian text which everyone should read #1: The Story of the Crop-Eared Dog

This is what happens when you mash together a revenge quest, a slasher movie, a buddy road trip, a bildungsroman, a fantasy epic, and a shaggy dog story and set it in medieval times. Because there aren’t many Irish Arthurian texts, whether Bhalbhuaidh, the protagonist, is meant to be Gawain or Galahad is controversial. His name and titles could point to either and his life situation seems more like Gawain’s, but I will refer to him Galahad because I find the idea of a Galahad AU where he’s pagan and gallivants around with a prince who was turned into a giant dog and lost all qualms about murder along the way entertaining. It starts when Arthur, who inexplicably holds the title of King of the World, convenes a hunt in the Dangerous Forest on the Plain of Wonders and the mysterious Knight of the Lantern does what any antagonistic knight worth his salt would do: gatecrash and ask for violence. It gets less normal very rapidly from there. Abhlach the druidess is at least as awesome as she is wicked, Galahad may or may not have a magical music-making sword, and the fact that there’s an Island of Naked Monks is never given any explanation because it’s only mentioned in passing when the dog tells Galahad he killed them all. 

Yeah, it’s a fun read.

Here’s a link to the translation I read:

Internet Archive

The story of the crop-eared dog; the story of Eagle-boy : Macalister, Robert Alexander Stewart, 1870-1950 : Free Download, Borrow, and Strea

207 p. 23 cm

When you realize that Tristan, Iseult, Dinadan, Palamedes, and Mark are basically the stock cast of a sitcom…

People who don’t know what “aroace” means never understand why I like losing when I play Old Maid.

I had a realization the other day:

Gawain was supposed to be the narrator of the Grail Quest.

Before Vulgate cycle and Sir Bors, the only other participant of the Grail Quest was Gawain. Gawain was used as a foil for Percival's story - a counterpart for Percival's character arc.

When reading Chretien's (unfinished) Grail story, it was always funny how Gawain takes up a significant chunk of the tale, but looking back at every version of the Grail cycle, there's this general trend that Percival was never going to return to Camelot to report the entire adventure to Arthur.

Percival's story is meant to end with him staying in the Grail Kingdom. So, someone else had to tell the story so it could be "passed down" and preserved as "history".

And that someone, had to be Gawain, the then-premier hero of the romances and Chretien's favorite.

Gawain isn't just the deuteragonist in Percival's story, he's also the one lives to tell the tale of Sir Percival.

Of Course, Robert de Boron comes along, and suddenly, the Grail Quest is everyone's adventure, but that's a different story...

“Dagonet the Fool” by Susan Spilecki

They call me "little man," "King Arthur's fool,"

And "simpleton," those lackeys at the court,

But this fool's mother had the Second Sight,

And sometimes when I caper for the king

I see more than Taliesin the bard

And Merlin the enchanter can, combined.

I stand before the dais, juggling:

The red balls first, then yellow, green and blue,

And when I add the gold and silver spheres,

The oval blur between my hands takes form.

A glowing, rainbow mirrow it becomes

Through which I see the king an older man.

His beard is shot with grey. Astride his horse

He sits up straighter than he would on land

When all the kingdom's cares, some awful guilt,

And the death of all his dreams lie on his back.

I see two rows of soldiers and a snake,

A sword unsheathed to kill it, turned on him--

I drop the balls and stammer out some jest,

A wish for pardon, while the courtiers roar.

He does not laugh. He sees my face go grey

With terror. Arthur thinks I fear his wrath.

He hands me the gold ball, rolled to his feet,

Says, "Dagonet, all people make mistakes."

He glances at his wife; she looks away.

Fool I may be, but even I can tell

There's something wrong when Guinevere looks down

Among the milling courtiers at one knight,

The tallest, bravest, handsomest in spurs:

At Lancelot, who never makes mistakes.

I scramble for the balls. He looks at me,

Then looks away, and shrugs his lion's mane.

Dismiss me as a fool, Sir Lancelot.

Better a fool in small things all my life

Than a great lord who, with one folly alone,

Casts all he loves to ruin at life's end.

Post-Camlann Incorrect Quote

Bedivere (to Arthur): I just fought in a battle for you, most of my friends are dead, you’re dying, I’m unemployed, the land is in turmoil and potential anarchy, Kay is I-don’t-know-the-heck where, you just killed my brother by hugging him, and I don’t even get to keep the darn sword?

Griflet-centric Reincarnation AU following Mort Artu canon

Griflet remembers bits and pieces of his past life, mostly from Camlann, so he starts doing surface-level research on Arthuriana. Since he's the one to throw the sword in the lake in Mort Artu but Bedivere is best known for it, he becomes convinced that he's the reincarnation of Sir Bedivere.

There are two outcomes which immediately come to mind. One is that he runs into other Arthurian reincarnations. In this case, he might vastly confuse everyone, particularly if Bedivere shows up too. They might even think he's an imposter. However, they might remember who he actually was and have a laugh about the whole thing.

The other is that he never tells anyone, or only tells the people he's closest to, because he doesn't think anyone will believe him. He goes about the rest of his life secretly thinking he's Bedivere. It impacts nothing substantial, though from time to time he makes references which confuse the people around him and he's always kind of worried something will happen to his hand.

Lynette's family in Arthuriana

We all have heard of Lynette. We either have met her in Alfred, Lord Tennyson’s poem, “Gareth and Lynette” from the Idylls of the King, or in Le Morte d’Arthur by Sir Thomas Malory. From the mid-19th century to the present day, many works have included her either as a minor character or as the main character of her own story. As is usual, it became a curiosity of mine to find out more about her and about her family as well. In order to do so, I researched four different Arthuriana, three from the 12th century and the other one from the 15th century.

The first Arthuriana is the English one, titled “Le Morte d’Arthur” written by Sir Thomas Malory in the 15th century. In Book IV (Winchester manuscript), a damsel appears at the Pentecost feast, asking Arthur for his assistance. She withholds her identity and where she comes from. All she wants is one of Arthur’s best knights to fight for her sister who is being besieged by a tyrant.

Naturally, Arthur says no because she won’t give him more information. As we know, Beaumains (in reality, Prince Gareth of Orkney) volunteers. This pisses the damsel off because she thinks he’s a kitchen boy. During the journey, she and Beaumains clash constantly with each other. It takes them time to earn each other’s respect. It also leads for them to trust to each other. It is at Sir Persaunt of India’s city that their names to each other are revealed.

Sir Persaunt reveals her name as Lyonette (Linet in the Caxton manuscript), to which she admits it is so. Further down the text, Beaumains makes them swear not to tell anyone (which they swear not to do so) and reveals his own name.

In the end, Gareth wins against the Knight of the Red Lands, also known as Sir Ironside. He also falls in love with Lyonette’s sister, Dame Lyonesse. But she shoos him away by telling him to wait until a year later so that he gains experience and more renown. However, she changes her mind and tells her older brother, Sir Gringamore, to kidnap Gareth’s dwarf. The narrative reveals that Sir Gringamore is married. Moreover, he lives in the Isle of Avalon as it is revealed much later.

After a lot of shenanigans happen (one of them involving an undead knight), a year later Gareth marries Lyonesse. In addition, Lyonette and her niece Laurel (most probably Sir Gringamore's daughter) are married to Gaheris and Agravaine in an arranged marriage.

On the other hand, in the 12th century Arthuriana, “Érec & Énide”, written by Chretien de Troyes, Sir Gringamore, called Guigomar in the narrative, appears as a guest in the wedding of Érec and Énide. He is called the Lord of the Isle of Avalon, as well as Morgan le Fay’s “friend”. His younger brother Graislemier of Fine Posterne also appears as a guest, alongside twenty companions that came along with him.

It is of interest to mention that in another of Chrétien de Troyes’ poems, “Yvain Or The Knight Of The Lion”, Lunete mentions to her mistress, Laudine, that she got a message from her contact Demoiselle Sauvage informing her that Arthur will be coming around Laudine’s lands and she still doesn’t have anyone to defend her fountain. Similarly, in Malory, Lyonette is also called Damsel Savage as well. There is the probability that Malory took inspiration from this unnamed damsel from Chrétien de Troyes and ascribed the title to Lyonette. However, there’s not enough research that proves this possibility.

Lastly, in the First Continuation of Chrétien de Troyes’ “Perceval” written by an unknown author, Sir Gringamore makes a reappearance once more in the narrative. He’s called Guingemuer rather than Guigomar. In the story, Guerrehet (Gareth as he’s called in the narrative) avenges his half-fairy son King Brangemuer, whom he had with Queen Brangepart (a fairy). The king was named after both his parents and it is implied in the narrative that now that his mortal side is gone, he’ll still live through his fairy side of the family.

If these sources are conflated together, it can be thus concluded that:

Sir Gringamore is the Lord of the Isle of Avalon. He was at one time a lover of Morgan le Fay and he was also the lover of a fairy called Brangepart with whom he had a son called Brangemuer. He later got married and had daughter called Laurel. He’s the eldest of four siblings.

Sir Graislemier of Fine Posterne is the second brother of Sir Gringamore, and most probably lives in Avalon or in a territory adjacent to it.

Lady Lyonesse of Castle Perilous is the third sibling and youngest sister of Gringamore and the eldest sister of Lynette. She holds her own lands close to the Isle of Avalon. Moreover, she holds a magic ring that changes appearances. She married Sir Gareth of Orkney.

Lady Lynette is the youngest sister of four siblings. She's a healer, knows the magic arts, riser of the undead and wandering damsel. She’s otherwise known by Damsel Savage. She has different contacts, one of them being Lunete. She married Sir Gaheris of Orkney.

Lyonesse, Lynette and Laurel are close in age, since they married three of the Orkney brothers.

References

De Troyes, C. (2015). The complete story of the Grail: Chrétien de Troyes’ Perceval and Its Continuations (N. Bryant, Trans.). Boydell & Brewer Ltd.

De Troyes, C. (2018a). Érec & Énide (A. S. Kline, Trans.). Poetry in Translation. https://www.poetryintranslation.com/PITBR/French/DeTroyesErecEnidehome.php

De Troyes, C. (2018b). Yvain Or The Knight Of The Lion (A. S. Kline, Trans.). Poetry in Translation. https://www.poetryintranslation.com/PITBR/French/DeTroyesYvainhome.php

Malory, T. (2009). Sir Thomas Malory’s Morte Darthur: A New Modern English Translation Based on the Winchester Manuscript (D. Armstrong, Ed. & Trans.). Parlor Press LLC.

…as he should be.

I forgot the name of Maimonides-

So I searched up "Jewish philosopher with opinions" and he was the first result.

As an Arthuriana junkie who tried to secede from the United States of America in fourth grade, this made my month.

I was looking something up and I found this.

Normal so far, but wait... is that Molossia? As in parody micronation Molossia?

Yes. Yes it is.