Today's Adorable Dad Thing Is:

ok-do

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I'm playing Lego Indiana Jones! (just finished PotC so)

Quick what are you doing RIGHT now (besides scrolling Tumblr)

one shred of mortality away from dumping crushed cheez-its on a baked potato

Best Christmas presents this year!:

Number one definitely gonna be the backpack my dad gave me. It was his cherished backpack for ages. Back support, hip and sternum straps, pocketsss, you name it. I opened the backpack and a moth fluttered out like in a movie. The best Christmas present by far!

Ramen bowl full of Ramen socks. My 14yo brother really hit the nail on the head this year! I guess I do have that college student aura TM

Jar of peanut butter from Santa. Huge jar.

I saw this sketchbook in the local book store when my 17yo brother and I were Christmas shopping. It had a textured Starry Night cover and ooooo! It's not a lined journal! It's blank paper inside! and he bought it for me 🥹

19yo brother surprised me with a D&D book?? like I don't keep up too much on the discourse of new 5e is bad or whatever folks are saying these days, but I *love* having the physical books because *readability*

writing questionnaire I stole :) (siblings)

found this post by @willtheweaver and wanted to fill in with my own characters! it was a tag game but I'm still new enough to having a tumblr account that I'm not sure who to tag. anyone can steal this.

(two sets of siblings, Evan/Austin and Jack/James/Jude/Julian):

Who looks more like their dad? Evan

probably James.

Who looks more like their mom? Evan

either Jude or Julian.

Who eats the most? Austin probably

Jude used to eat a lot, but then he got a girlfriend and went on this fitness kick. (as if his body wasn't good enough. It was.) Julian probably eats the normalest amount Jack goes in spurts but can eat a ton. James kinda is similar but less on again, off again - he just shovels it down.

Who has been in the weirdest situations? You'd think it would be Austin, but it's actually Evan 110%

Jack, by nature of Protagonist Syndrome, but James gets a lot of it too

Who sleeps the most? Austin :)

Between Jack and James, Jack thinks it's James. James has a healthy sleep schedule. Julian sleeps the most.

Who has the most stable romantic life? ...Austin? though to be fair Evan's mostly a mess in general, not in romance specifically

Jack, because he's a brick wall of not understanding. Stable, sure, but I'd call James healthiest as far as romantic life goes. Jude has had a girlfriend for longest but the way he approaches romance doesn't feel quite stable somehow.

What is the worst habit of each? Evan: Catastrophizing Austin: Trying new things (without stopping to think)

Jack: Protagonist SyndromeTM (Wants to do it alone, no matter what the "it" is. Saving the world or struggling through homework. He's gonna be the one to take care of it.) Jude: Comparing things to Twilight James: Getting himself into trouble :) or giving people rocks. Julian: Feigning indifference, making fun of his brothers (mostly accidentally)

Who is the most dramatic? Austin. Which isn't to say Evan's not a drama queen, because he is.

Jack. Baby of the family, rip. Julian went through a phase but he will deny it to his dying breath.

Who has the weirdest phase? Another one of those you'd think it would be Austin but it's Evan. I guess I should explain the phase, but I'll come back to that.

While Julian had A Phase, Jude's was actually the weirdest. He was super into Twilight. Still is, actually.

Who is the best cook in the family? Austin's the best cook on accident, Evan's the more reliable cook.

Julian is the best cook. James is the most creative (in a way that he makes always work out somehow). Jack gets by, and Jude is better than Jack.

What is their best memory together? For Evan, it's when they defeated that dragon back in 8th grade and he realized he was free to spend time with Austin again instead of being ashamed. For Austin, it's a memory of Evan's smile.

All four of them, it was probably the Christmas Santa showed up and gave them a sleigh ride. Julian was convinced it was Dad or Grandpa. Except Dad showed up and the whole family went out together, and they ended the journey at their grandparents' house, where both Grandma and Grandpa were settling in for the night. Jude had spent some time believing Julian but was very excited when Julian was wrong and Santa actually was real. Jack and James were pretty little and had no concept of what Julian and Jude were talking about. They were in it for the bright red sleigh with jingle bells and snow under the nighttime street lamps and getting to stay up past their bedtime.

What is their worst memory together? The Incident where Austin nearly died in an alleyway, Evan spent three days trapped in an unfamiliar and traumatizing landscape trying to recover Austin, and then Evan killed Austin when he found him. (He did survive but that was hecka traumatic and their relationship has never been the same again.)

A bad miscommunication that

What is their dream trip together? The seaside, probably in Ireland

The boys always wanted to go to that place where you can break apart rocks with Viking axes. It's unclear how the four of them came to know of such a place and it's unclear if such a place even exists.

Would you rather: not be able to shower or change clothes? Evan and Austin: Not shower.

Jack: Not shower Jude: Change clothes, I've GOTTA shower for my girl James: Change clothes. I wanna shower Julian: Meh whatever's more convenient for whatever I have going on that day. (That's not an answer. His answer would probably be not shower, since it's easier to look like you take care of yourself if you wear a different outfit every day.)

Who’s older? Evan and Austin change back and forth on that. Neither of them really knows. Austin may be years younger than Evan by some manners of measuring, but I don't think that should count because they're the same age. (At one point they had the same birthday, but over the years I think Austin's birthday drifted apart from Evan's. Not sure in which direction and at any rate they're uh. still the same age.)

Jack/James/Jude/Julian, that order. When Jack was three, James was five, Jude was twelve, and Julian was seventeen.

Describe each other in three words: Austin (as described by Evan): Crazy magic idiot Evan (as described by Austin): Strong idiot magic

These ones will be the three words the other three brothers could agree upon: Jack: Baby (werewolf) (no you can't say werewolf) (why not?) (Mom said not to!) (come on he's more than just a werewolf) (can I say Tourette's?) (dude shut up) (Julian I'm going to put autistic on yours) (okay fine not werewolf what else then?) (young?) (we already said baby) (oh yeah) cool (dragon) (dude that's not even true) (yeah but wouldn't it be cool if he was a dragon?) (Jude come on!) (actually no I think Jude's right) (no guys. I vote no. let's be real.) (Julian come onnnn) (he's not a dragon!) (yeah but what IF-) (how about annoying) (no that would be you, dork) (shut up man he can be annoying too) tired (yeah he does get tired like. a lot.) Jude: (Twilight!) (yeah but a person can't be Twilight) (I don't know if Jack could be a dragon Jude could be Twilight) (that's not fair) (fiiiiiiine) (girlfriend?) (no Jack that doesn't describe him. that's just something he has.) Teenage mutant ninja James: (Annoying) (hey he's not annoying!) (well you're both annoying) (that's no fair, he's only annoying to you) (so what?) crazy sneaky climbing Julian: obnoxious older brother

Who is their role model? Zab

Jack's is James. James's is Steve from Blue's Clues. Jude's is Jacob from Twilight, which is a bit worrying. Julian says he doesn't have a role model. He does, and it's his great-grandpa on his mom's side, who is a war veteran.

Who usually has the worst ideas? Oh, definitely Austin. But.

Jude hits the "a little confused but he got the spirit" vibes, often with very bad ideas coming from good-meaning intentions. Jack is reckless. James goes with the flow, altering said flow when he needs, but good at it.

Who is the “certified bug killer”? Evan

Julian. Jack will do it, though was squeamish about it for a while. James catches them with his bare hands to let them outside, even if they bite or have stingers or pincers. Jude will grab a broom and try to sweep it outside until his mom yells at him to just grab a cup and scoop it up.

does anyone wanna hold hands until we feel a little braver

God made us just enough the same and just enough different

okay powerpoint nights in Spanish class are the best not that it's night or anything that's just the vibes

like

first person got up there and just popped off about video games, developing them and all the work it takes, how they positively affect our culture

then I got to get up and give my absolutely Word 1997 colored WordArt crammed powerpoint about The Thing Everyone Knows I Like

and then the third guy gets up and presents about music, in particuar jazz and Marvin Gaye and stuff and dang this man has good taste in music

AND THEN our fourth classmate blows us all out of the water as she gets up there, says musicals are the best, and proceeded to show us 4 slides of her granddaughter in different musicals she did through middle and high school while talking about how she got better over the years and landed a star role in one of the musicals when she was in high school

anyway idk life is pretty neat sometimes and you get to enjoy other people enjoying things that they enjoy and I don't know how to put it into words but it's nice

Important rules/tips I've learned as an adult that helped with anxiety

If people are mad at you, it's their responsibility to tell you, not your responsibility to guess

If they're mad at you in secret anyways, they're the ones in the wrong, not you

If people don't like what you're doing, it's their responsibility to tell you

If they say it's fine when it's really not, they're the ones in the wrong, not you

People are allowed to be wrong about you

If they are wrong about you, wait for them to bring it up, because if you try to, you will inevitably overcorrect

Some people are committed to misunderstanding you. You will not win arguments against them. Yes, even if you explain your point of view. They do not care. Drop it

The worst thing that will happen from a first-time offense is being told not to do it again. Maybe with a replacement if you broke something

You can improve relationships and gauge willingness to talk to you by giving compliments. It's like a daily log-in bonus and nobody thinks twice about it

Most things are better after you sleep on them

Most things are better after you have a meal

Most things are better after you shower

Your brain makes up consequences that are irrational. If the worst DOES come to pass and someone acts like they do in your head, they are overreacting, and you are entitled to say "what the fuck"

If your chest hurts after you feel like you've made a social error, that's called rejection-sensitive dysphoria. It means your anxiety is so bad that it's causing you physical pain, which is a good indicator that you're overreacting. Tense yourself, hold it for 20 seconds, let it go, then find a distraction

If you're suddenly angry at someone after you feel like you made a social error, that's also rejection-sensitive dysphoria. You are going to feel annoyed about it for awhile, but being genuinely pissed off is your anxiety trying to find something to blame to take the responsibility off your shoulders, and getting scared because it can't justify itself. Deep breaths, ask yourself how much you ACTUALLY want to be angry at that person, then find a distraction

"Sour grapes" is more healthy for you than stewing. Deciding you don't like someone who's perpetually annoyed with you, won't talk to you, etc. makes letting go of anxiety over them easier

If people don't like you, they will find reasons to be annoyed with you when they otherwise wouldn't. If people do like you, they will find reasons NOT to be annoyed with you when they otherwise would. People do not ping-pong between the two

You DO have to make a conscious choice not to think about something. If you're having trouble circling back to it, say out loud that you're done thinking about it and why. Then find a distraction

When you're upset, part of you is going to want to make false bids for attention (suddenly texting differently, heavy sighs, etc. but when someone asks you about it, you tell them it's nothing). Do not listen to it. You gain nothing from it except more misery

People like to help people they care about. It makes them feel good about themselves

If you think you're insufferable for needing help, see above. Yes, really. They get a serotonin kick from it

If you think you're insufferable for mannerisms you have, you either have to consciously choose not to do them, or accept that they're part of the package that comes with you. Being apologetic about existing does nothing except make you more miserable

If you do things you don't like when you feel meh about it, it makes it easier to do them when you hate it

If you avoid things you don't like when you feel meh about it, it reinforces and magnifies how bad it feels when you hate it

Seriously. Read those last two points again. If you can make yourself make a phone call when you've got nothing to lose, you will slowly lose that panic you get when you have to make a phone call you haven't prepared for. You do have to CONSCIOUSLY take that step

Hobbies that make you care for something get rid of that nagging feeling that you're not doing enough. Go grow some rosemary

If you don't engage with your hobbies regularly, you will feel miserable, and anxiety will spike

Hobbies are things that give you a bit of happiness. They do not have to be organized or named to do that. Go be creative in something. Play with coins. Make up lists. Start a new WIP

No one cares what you look like

If people point out things they don't like about how you look unprompted, they are being rude. You are entitled to say "what the fuck"

People who like you will find you pretty to some degree. Minor things about your appearance go completely unnoticed. Literally, scars and dots and blemishes do not register to someone who likes your company

You looking at yourself in the mirror is 10x more closely than anyone is going to look at you

If you're anxious about your body type, and you're creatively inclined, make/write an oc with that same shape. Give them nice things and make other characters love them. Put them on adventures. You'll start to see yourself in the mirror more kindly

You care about wording and perfect lines/colors way more than anyone who views your work ever will

Sometimes when you're upset, you're going to feel like not eating. Do not do that. Not eating makes you more miserable

Same with things you normally enjoy. Denying yourself helps no one. You are punishing yourself for being sad. Stop it

Both of these will take conscious decision to break the habit of. Make yourself do it anyways, and it will slowly get easier

And again, to reiterate: If someone is mad at you, it is THEIR responsibility to tell you, not your responsibility to guess

keep a little SAND under my pillow for the SANDMAAAAAN

keep a little mail under my pillow for the 🎵mailmannn🎵