Peter: .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.-- [translation: I’M SORRY]

Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark/Iron Man 2008-2019

Peter trying his best to be sexy and seductive but Tony just finds it adorable and gives him cuddles and kisses. The boy is simply too cute and innocent.

“I’m trying to seduce you,” Peter pouts.

Tony smiles and kisses Peter’s hair, cuddling him tightly and speaking into his soft curls. “I’m seduced.”

“How?”

“You’ve got me wrapped around your little finger, you know that?”

Peter groans. “I want my mouth wrapped around your… you-know,” he mumbles shyly against Tony’s chest, blushing.

Tony laughs softly. “My what?”

“You know, Mr Stark.”

“If you can’t even say it how are you going to seduce me?”

“I thought you were already seduced?”

“By your cuteness,” Tony says softly, kissing Peter’s hair again.

Peter sighs but can’t help smiling. Maybe he’s not entirely ready for sex yet and that’s why he’s not “sexy” or “seductive”, but at least Tony doesn’t seem to mind right now. In fact, he seems to love Peter the way he is, and Peter can’t really ask for anything more.

Peter Parker meets batfam fics are funny to me because I think it’s bold of y’all to assume the batfam wouldn’t take one look at Peter, decide “oh that’s just a tim who still holds childhood innocence and wonder” and adopt him straight on the spot

Peter: *in Gotham for the first time* oh my gosh! *snaps photos* these buildings are so interesting! Bruce: *watching wearily* interesting? This thing is crumbling. Peter: exactly. Very good photo opportunities. Bruce: hmm.

Peter: *scarfing down the batburger Jason bought him* this is really good! Haha I just wish I had a coffee to go with it, I have a lot of studying to do tonight. Jason: *eyes narrow under helmet* coffee? Peter: *completely blazing past* so anyway are you like, the Friendly Neighborhood Crime Lord or—

Peter: *goes on long-winded chemistry rant* Damian: *staring* it’s like . . . . Jason: *leaning over to Damian* yeah. It’s like reading a translated book where everything is just slightly off but still similar enough to make you squint Damian: that is not the analogy I would have chosen, but okay Jason: hey as long as it continues to be chemistry and not technology. One of those I can handle moderately well. The other still sounds like gibberish. Damian: *raises brow* Jason: okay, yeah, I have no clue what he’s saying

they just bring Peter to the manor one day and are like “hey Tim, here’s your twin from another universe. Corrupt him with coffee addiction, murderous tendencies or general jadedness and we’ll announce Red Robin is going to finally address the copyright infringement allegations against that burger franchise”

thinking about this again

time loop fans when the loop changes slightly

Tony Stark voice: "Jarvis, leak his nudes"

me reading straight up pornography: hmm… this one just doesn’t have enough accurate character psychoanalysis to get me off

on love arriving unannounced

Ive come up with the phrase "blorbo-in-law" which is a fictional character who isn't, like, YOUR blorbo from YOUR shows but it is your mutual's blorbo who you nevertheless have developed strong opinions about due to long term dash exposure