Jim's And Sarah's Honest Couple Talk

Jim's and Sarah's honest couple talk

Sarah and I basically live apart in different cities. Unfortunately our work situation has forced us to live this way for the past 5 years.

We stay close by visiting each other as often as possible, but it is still not the same as living together in a single household. This makes for some very frustrating days and nights. When we are apart for protracted times we sext and talk with each other and mutually masterbate to the sounds of each others pleasures.

Sarah is a vibrant attractive middle aged woman who has always had other guys hitting on her. She has a great body and a beautiful smile. Since we've been married I haven't had sexual interest in any other woman but her. My pleasure revolves solely around her pleasure. So that leads me to my honest talks with her about our sexual desires especially when we are apart.

In the past Sarah occasionally had silent affairs with friends from outside of our marriage. This was mostly at the beginning of our marriage and even though she would never admit it, I was very aware of what was going on. I never told her to stop, but I did demand she be truthful about it. Here’s where the story gets tricky. She knows what turns me on and yet she was deathly afraid to act on it with my knowledge. So I never condemned her for what she did, but I just couldn't get her to share it with me. Obviously we didn't have a perfect marriage, but those acts of infidelity literally saved our marriage. Deep down she knew that what she had done was to make me want her even more and believe me it did and still does. Now even though her silence caused a significant amount of stress for me I also knew and appreciated what she had done.

I would spend countless hours thinking and rethinking about it and imagining what she was experiencing at those moments. Where had she done it? With whom how often? At the time it led me to spy on her just to get a glimpse of her private life, but still she never did understand that I was perfectly ok with it because to me the sex was the easiest part to understand.  I have always enjoyed a healthy sex drive. It's been a great 20 years of marriage and 20 years of me obsessing about her fucking other guys. To me it's a way of staying relevant in her life. Even though I would repeatedly tell her that it turns me on immensely for her to cheat, she would say that she had no interest in it. I knew that she had sexual interests that didn't involve me because occasionally her porn history would give it away. This led me to the extreme desire for her to explore her sexuality in ways others including her could not understand. I didn't even understand it sometimes, all I know is it drives me wild.

After many years of discussion we both believe that we can maintain a healthy sex life when we are apart if she fools around with other guys and includes me by simply telling me about it, letting me listen to her doing it and occasionally watching and even joining in on those occasions she decided we could play together. That way she can be completely guilt free, after all it's really not cheating if I'm asking her to do it. She knows she has my 100% support.

I have been able to focus in on the one aspect of it that leads me to very strong emotions of jealousy that drive me insane with lust for her not because she is with someone else, but because I am not in control. It is an out of control feeling like none other. The feeling of passion and love I have for her is amplified a hundred times over when I know she's doing something that I desire. I guess the easiest way to describe it is that even though we aren't together, we can still share intimacy with each other.

There are many great experiences that we have since shared as a result of our arrangement of me faithfully maintaining my monogamous vows to her and her having affairs with other guys to satisfy both of our sexual desires.

We found out the hard way that the key to a strong marriage is honest open talk among couples with patience and understanding. Sarah and I understand each others needs and she acts to meet my expectations without hesitation because she knows it makes us a better and infinitely happier couple. I allow her to do what she wants with anyone she wants, whenever she wants with no strings attached. Experts refer to it as a free hall pass for her to pursue whatever sexual interests she may desire.

If you find yourself in either a similar situation or having unexplainable desires to watch your wife have sex, then you should just talk to her about it. She may not want to hear it at first, but with time if you lovingly share your true feelings and wishes she will understand that it is not some trick, but rather a sincere desire on your part to be the most important part of her life.

It's no secret that sexless marriages are the number one cause of divorce. Understand that sex is sex and love is love. The confusion that crosses those lines is the same horrible miscommunication that comes from a failure on either part to be willing to actively give whatever it takes to make your marriage work. Failure is not an option it is an intentional consequence of silence.

Thankfully we can say that it has been a long road for us, but today we are happier than we have ever been. Despite our time away from each other physically, we are always together mentally. Our love, appreciation and respect for each other is unmatched by any other couple we personally know.