Hiii, Mousey! (◕ᴗ◕✿)

Hmm, I have multiple farmer OCs, and knowing them, they’ll definitely make sure their future descendants go through their own set of challenges. No free farm inheritances in this family! Like imagine this if my Farmer Aleia says this:

Look, I know some of my future kids might not even care about farming. Some will probably run off to be musicians, adventurers, or heaven forbid corporate workers. But I also know that at least one of them is gonna look at this farm and think, "Yeah, I wanna do this."

And to that child, I say: Earn it.

Before I kick the bucket, I’m setting up trials. Just like Grandpa did to me. He made me work to prove I deserved this farm, then you bet I’m keeping the tradition alive. But mine? Mine will be different—probably even harder. Maybe a scavenger hunt, maybe an obstacle course, maybe I’ll just hide the deed and see if they can find it. Either way, if they want this land, they better be ready to put in some effort.

And if my grandkids want to farm? Well, I hope my kids keep the challenges going. Maybe they’ll make it easier, maybe harder. I don’t care, as long as it’s entertaining.

Keep the legacy alive.

Ok ok ok, question!

If your OC Farmer has children with their partner (vanilla candidates, mods candidates - doesn't matter!), will your Farmer put the same trials for the children/grandchildren as the trials Grandpa gave to Farmer? Will it be similar like Mastery Cave, or will your OC Farmer give different challenges?

Wheeezes! Their reactions are so hilarious. 😂 Imagine if the adventurers and including Camila or Jadu visiting the Farmer for some favors and notice the huge ass smiling blueberry with sunglasses in the farm.

A random thought, during the Mr. Qi's Crop Challenge (you know the one were you have to plant and shipped 500 Qi Beans) how will the SDV/SVE Bachelors gonna react to their lover (the Farmer) planting this weird looking crop that looks like a blueberry with sunglasses across the farm fields. 😂

Ah, Qi beans... Probably my least favourite quest, because spending a whole month growing this stuff, and also getting these fucking beans instead of cool gifts in chests or fish.... Ugh. Oh well, sorry for that 😅

Even though this fruit is annoying to me, the ask itself regarding the reactions of others to it is pretty funny, hee hee. Thanks for the ask, and enjoy! 🫰💖

_________________________________________

SDV/SVE bachelors react to the Qi fruit:

"Looks creepy..... And cool, by the way. What did you do to make them grow like that?" Sebastian's spouse is a virtuoso at growing all sorts of unusual crops, and he thinks it's a mega cool ability. Just a week ago they ate a salad made from an 'ancient fruit', and the day before yesterday they cut up a giant mushroom crop that was the size of a large pumpkin (even though Sebby's doesn't like shrooms, it was still cool!). Now it's the weird fruit with sunglasses. He wonder what unusual plant Farmer will grow tomorrow...

"Oh, I know! Are those fruits and vegetables that grow in different shapes?" Sam recently watched a video about gardeners who grow square watermelons or tomatoes in the shape of hearts using plastic moulds. So the guitarist reckoned his spouse had decided to join the trend too. A strange choice, yeah, but hey - bonus for cool sunglasses! And what does this 'Qi' fruit taste like? Looks like a giant blue melon, Sammy wouldn't mind a tasty snack. Anyway, he doesn't know much about gardening himself, so he'll leave that to Farmer.

"Did you buy sunglasses for every fruit you grow or what?" And tell us, dear Alex - why would your beloved Farmer do that? These things maybe look like sunglasses, but are hardly sunglasses. But who knows? It's definitely an unfamiliar fruit for an athlete, especially compared to what his grandmother Evelyn used to grow in the community garden all the time. But if it's edible and full of vitamins (no), then Alex doesn't really care about the look of the Qi fruit. "Hey, even if this tastes awful, we'll have plenty of pairs of sunglasses!"

"That's some ugly ass fruit right here. Do people really eat that stuff now?" Truth be told, while working at JojaMart, Shane had managed to see stranger products labelled as 'novelty'. This applied not only to obscure sauces and snacks of dubious origin, but also to fruits and vegetables. The blue colour of the "Qi" fruit Farmer grew generally gave Shane the idea that his spouse had purchased the seeds just from Joja.co. It looked strange, but Shane didn't even mind tasting it. If it's edible at all. This fruit certainly doesn't get any worse than Joja's 'special' sauce for nachos, of that he's sure.

"Honey, are you sure it's safe to eat?" Every time another crop of obscure origin ripens on the farm, Harvey's heart begins to pound with worry. What if it's poisonous? What if it's not handled properly and you could get food poisoning? Why is it such a strange shape? "Farmer, please..." The poor doctor goes through all the books on vegetables, fruits and berries, hoping to find some information about this Qi fruit and whether it's okay to eat it (spoiler - to no avail). Either it's another "healthy" product from Joja or something else. Either way, Harvey will be sceptical, to say the least.

"...If I understand correctly, my soul, this is our dinner for today?" Elliott could have sworn the fruit had just winked at him! The writer had heard that some farmers and gardeners deliberately grow their crops in a variety of shapes to make them look extravagant and sell them for more money, but... Of all the shapes, his spouse chose the face... But maybe that's the kind of crop that's in high demand on market right now. Elliott hoped that if they were to bake strudel with this 'Qi' fruit today, it would taste better than it looked. Also... sunglasses?

"Hmm, I wonder... Where exactly did you get those seeds, my love?" It is not appropriate for Lance to judge the strange crop that Farmer has grown, when the adventurer himself has a monster crop ripening in a corner on the farm, with an appearance similar to a huge eyeball. Nevertheless, this strange fruit arouses a share of suspicion in the pink-haired man. Something is not right here.... If his dear spouse doesn't mind, Lance would also like to take a look at this fruit, for he is very curious to know if this crop has any magical properties. Or anything that might threaten him or Farmer.

"This... thing is unnatural. What in the name of all spirits did you grow this abomination from?" Magnus's whole gut screams that this is not just a fruit, but the spawn of a dangerous mage or witch. Thin threads of dark magic emanate from this fruit, and the wizard certainly doesn't like Farmer being in contact with that magic. "Eat it? Absolutely not! And is it even edible?" A worried Magnus questions his spouse about who gave them these seeds and why. Hearing the name 'Qi', he sighs heavily. Mr. Qi. Of course... This name definitely promises a lot of chaos for everyone.

"Erm... That's wonderful, darling! You've managed to grow this, um... What's it called again?" Victor had spent two whole days in the town library and looked all sorts of books at home - not a single mention, about this mysterious 'Qi fruit'. It's not, to tell the truth, the strangest thing Farmer grew in their fertile fields (monster crops will always be at the top of the list for strangeness. Especially the one with the giant eyeball). Maybe it's some new fruit his spouse has discovered? Victor is sure the Farmer knows what they're doing. But yeah, he's supportive.

I just found out one of Sterling's love gifts are 🌻🌻🌻 and being a generous friend, I gift him one. (Yes. speed up his heart events) But I didn't know, gifting him that flower gives a different dialogue.

The way he blush is just so adorable! 🥺

Two idiots in love alright! 😂 What a happy wedding. 😁💒 Sooo when will the two adopt a baby or maybe some mpreg on the side? I mean, there is magic in the SDV universe. I wouldn't be surprised if Camilla made a potion to make males get impregnate as a joke.

(Two headcanon stories I've been reading today and all of them are my request/asks. Thank you, Mousy for writing them. This feels like an early bday present for me. 😍✨)

Hello Mousy! 👋😁 Here I am finally decided to be (not anonymous) present. Hear me out I don't know if this ever been asked before, can you make another headcanon about our two adventurers (yes I'm talking about LanceXIsaac) were after years of dating, they've been thinking of getting married but who proposes first?

How will the wedding go? Maybe something in public because of their position from different guilds or maybe something more intimate like a private wedding. After the wedding they'll probably be going to their honeymoon trip. I'm sure that their superiors will give the two a month off from their work. Just give the two to enjoy their married bliss. 👀✨

#I know this suppose to be a crackship

#but ngl I can see this ship work out well

Believe me, I've already stopped considering them as a crackship 👀💕 Thank you for your ask and enjoy! 🫰

I want to note that in this case I described the marriage proposal process specifically with rings, because Castle Village will have its own unusual tradition about it, like Pelican Town with the mermaid pendant. In the meantime, there's no 2.0 yet, so proposal rings!

_________________________________________

These two idiots managed to propose to each other on the same day. However, the process didn't go as they had planned.

A short patrol in the Highlands ended in a surprise attack by forest monsters. Well, it's kind of understandable that Highlands is crawling with slimes and golems, but neither Lance nor Isaac expected an attack right outside the Highlands tower, where the area is surrounded by protective blue lights. The golem gave Isaac's arm a good scratch, but both adventurers quickly recovered and dealt with the threat.

While an agitated Lance was bandaging his grumbling lover's hand, the items that had fallen out of Isaac's backpack were lying on the grass. One of them was a strange little box that Lance managed to open. And he saw a beautiful gold ring, with runes and a large stone. Isaac got all flushed and muttered that "the moment is ruined." And when he looked at Lance, the pink-haired man pulled the same small box out of his pocket. Also with a ring, also a jewellery masterpiece and that too covered with magical runes. I told you - two idiots in love...

The ceremony was private and only members of both Guilds and a few family members/relatives and friends were present. Approximately there were about twenty people at the wedding, no more. It seems to me that both men would rather have a quiet and peaceful wedding than a loud and rowdy one. It's hard to say about the ceremony itself, because Castle Village definitely has its own traditions, but the newlyweds and guests had a great time. Their honeymoon will definitely be like travelling through different parts of the Republic: from Ginger Island with its azure beach, to the snowy mountains, in a small house with a fireplace and hot tea. Just for the two of them.

Here's a Farmer portrait of my farmer oc, Aleia. She's actually my first save file farmer. There are other farmer ocs but I'm not yet done with their portraits. For now, here are Aleia's seasonal outfits portrait. Each outfit is what she wears for casual and festivals from different seasons.

Caldarus, my dear, you just woke up from your eternal sleep and THIS is what’s happening?? I know you’re an immortal dragon guardian, but I also know you can still feel pain, yet here you are, unable to cook, brushing your hair with a tree branch, and eating random objects to regain your memories. Please, I am begging you, let me take care of you before you accidentally speedrun your own downfall. 😭💀

so like out of all the dialogue i've gotten from caldarus, he:

can't cook for shit. he burns fried rice and his noodles turn black. his cakes will not rise

had a Caffeine incident

struggles with having long hair, gets leaves tangled in it and used to brush it with his claws. switched to a pine branch because "it's faster"

in an attempt to regain his memories he's grinding literally everything he finds and eating it

thinks that if he had wings in this form it would make it difficult to sleep in bed

hopeless at organizing all his damn scrolls (he swears hes not a messy person though please believe him)

is a Fabric Freak™

JUST FOUND OUT THIS INTERESTING IMMERSIVE DIALOGUE/CUSTOM EVENTS MOD ABOUT OUR BOY, SEBASTIAN! 💜

Sooo I saw this mod from Nexus, been trying to find some new immersive Sebastian mods since the previous one I download got a bit stale for me (especially I read all the dialogues) and I do not want to divorce this fine emo specimen. So I keep searching till I found this mod, "Maggs Immersive Sebastian Dialogue and Custom Events Spicy or Sweet" by MaggPlays.

(Here's an example of the mod's cutscene with Sebastian walking with my farmer, Aleia to get her home safely after some few night drinks, I think?)

(During the walk, they were almost near the farm until Sebby here decides to confess his feelings and thinks tha Aleia will forget about it the next day.)

After reading the mod's description, its best to play this mod at the start of Year 1 to fully experience the love journey with Sebastian, and its even better if you marry him in Year 3. All those event scenes are so satisfying to watch. Even his vanilla heart events are even altered. Ngl the way he acted is just so CUTE! The mod really made me love Sebby more. (And not divorcing him for Sterling *cough*)

But I can't use my farmer OC, Aleia. Since she's already married to Sebastian and is now on Year 5, not gonna risk and use Cheats Menu to go time traveling. So I made a new save file and have the same identity as Aleia.

Awww look at him! Taking my Farmer Aleia, on a beach picnic date.

Humbly asking for your horny Jio rant (≧ω≦。)!!!!

(I am ravenous for even the smallest of crumbs)

Summary: [RSV] Jio NSFW Alphabet (I pick my favorite letters so nothing's in order!) Warning(s): 18+ filth (Im not holding back, y'all have been warned) Kinda nothing tbh I'm literally just spitting from the mouth and hoping it makes sense. Rough Sex + Dub-con(?) (In letter D but it's Jio's imagination), Side note(s): Oh girl/boy/sibling...ANON BUCKLE UP. I struggled writing this ngl, I could write a fucking essay about how much this man means to me but I didn't want to use a ask to just rant away so...this is like a normal NSFW ABC fic but with some humor (my horny rantings) sprinkled in so lol, be on the lookout for those.

quick side note ; to the poor unfortunate souls that may come across this post don't have a single fucking clue who Jio is. This is Jio from the RSV mod aka the man I'd willingly slut myself out to.

extra note alert ; Before we begin though, I want to make one thing really clear.

I'm biased as all hell toward Jio because I have the biggest thing for elves. Woman, man, doesn't matter to me. If they have pointy ears and are unusually attractive and tall, then I'm all in dude. So with that being said? Please believe me when I say that stars shot from my eye sockets when I learned this man was an elf.

AND THAT'S NOT EVEN THE BEST PART.

A = Aftercare (What they're like after sex)

Jio would be the king of aftercare. His dialogue already implies that him and farmer get freaky on the regular so he'll definitely ask you if you need any water or if anywhere is a little more sore than the usual (in which case, he's giving you a massage that puts professionals to shame). But if you say no to any of these and state that you'd rather just cuddle, he's pulling you closer to his body immediately and whispering sweet words to you as he pets your head until you go to sleep.

♡ - "Drink," The soft-spoken word made you steadily crack your eyes open before, through your hazy vision, you saw Jio standing over you with a cup of water in his hand. You snickered quietly to yourself as you propped yourself on your arm to take it, the crispy refreshing taste of the liquid going down your throat both hydrating you as well as giving your body a jolt of awakeness. And as a delicious ache ran through your body, particularly in-between your legs after you and Jio's love-making session.

Your cheeks started to darken and warm a little at the memory of what you and your husband had done only a few minutes ago. Something that Jio quickly picked up on as he smirked at the alluring sight of you growing more and more embarrassed from your own thoughts. "Something on your mind, my love?"

B = Body Part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

Jio would definitely be proud of his muscles. There's a scene where the farmer openly gawks at him when he's meditating in his spouse area so I think after seeing his spouse so openly drool over him. He'd become more focused on his muscles when he trains and would definitely give the farmer a little show every now and again. As for the farmer, though? As cheesy as this response is, I think Jio would love every part of you, there's no part that he favors really because he thinks your literal being is a blessing in his eyes. This means there's definitely a lot of body worship during sex.

♡ - You felt like you were on cloud nine right now as Jio kissed every available surface area of skin on your body.

Each time his lips would ghost over your skin. The more your thighs twitched with the urge to clench if it weren't for your husband situating himself between them, his hand teasingly petting at your soaked cunt much to your dismay. "J-Jio..." You begged, the sound of your whiny voice making the elf throb in his pants before he looked up at you through hooded eyes. He placed one last kiss on your hand before he responded with a throaty "Yes"?

"Please..."

You hated how you felt yourself throb at the sight of him smirking at you, almost as if he were a fox who just an inch closer to capturing his prey. "Please what, my star?" He turned your hand over to press a kiss in the middle of your palm before he moved down to your stomach, kissing down and closer and closer to the area you wanted him most until he stopped again. "You have to be more specific, begging aimlessly won't get you anywhere."

You pouted. "T-There." You tried gesturing to your aching pussy by grinding forward against his clothed dick, eliciting a sharp hiss from him. Yet, as quickly as you tried to seduce him into giving up on reminding you of his manners, he moved back a little to avoid any more of your tempting ministrations.

"You know how to ask properly, not by acting like a tempting vixen." He pinched your thigh lightly as a warning, a whine escaping your lips as you ran your tongue over them.

"Please...touch my pussy, I-I need you."

His praising smile felt like it could light up your very soul. "As you wish, my star."

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically)

Okay so— I feel like when it comes to Jio himself? He's not big on cumming on you. Since he sees as no less than a goddess basically, in his eyes? Cumming on you is degrading, no matter how much you try to convince him that you're into it. However, cumming inside of you is definitely on the books, he loves it. As for you though? This man is a total Munch Master 365 days out of the year. Want to ride his face until he squirts on you? He's into it. When he fucks you and he sees your slick beginning to drip from your hole and onto the floor, he has to resist the urge to eat you out in order to continue stuffing you full. Your cum is essentially ambrosia to him, he could go hours drinking you down and he's never going to be fully satisfied.

♡ - He couldn't get enough of your sweet nectar.

Your delicious slick that dripped from your needy cunt after just a few minutes of foreplay. Jio would've had a mind to laugh if he weren't so focused on sucking on your clit right now, his arms locked around your thighs to keep you from closing them as you moaned and pulled at his hair, the stinging pain encouraging him to keep going in his ministrations whilst he struggled to try and keep a close eye on you.

But, from the combined fact that his head was swirling from both your taste and his growing lust, as well as his bare cock twitching against the bedsheets, the little friction it had from his grinding against the sheets only did enough to make him needier and needier for your warmth rather than actually getting him off!

Then again, in the face of your pleading eyes looking down at him in a silent bid for him to keep going until you came...

How was he able to deny such an expression?

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He definitely would've had a dirty imagination about you once or twice before you two even started dating. However, they would mostly be along the lines of "Yoba, this farmer is so annoying because they say hi to me every day...let me fuck them to take my frustrations out on them". Now, when these thoughts would pop up, he would definitely try to bury them, to the point no matter how hard his dick if after thinking about it. He's not going to falter and touch himself. But oh boy, does it cause him to start to see you in a new light after starting to think about what you look like under your clothes.

♡ - Typically, Jio was in control of himself much more than this.

He wasn't aware of a single thing in this world that could shake his foundations or make him waver in his beliefs. But...it seemed that you were a unique exception because, for the last few nights since the night the two of you began talking since your victory in the Spirit World. His mind has been...plagued, with certain imaginations that is.

Imaginations that focused on the topic of how annoyed he was of you.

It was infuriating how you didn't understand the words 'Go Away'.

So, in the deepest reaches of his mind, he knew the perfect method to make you understand how much he disliked you. He'd approach you in a forest, perhaps you would already be on your way to talk to him one-sidedly once more, and he'd pull you towards him before smashing his lips against you.

His cock would twitch inside his pants at the sound of your needy moan, eager and possibly elated at the fact that you were finally getting the attention you were seeking from the very beginning as Jio swiftly pressed you against the bark of a tree and flip up your skirt.

"Tch," He click his tongue at the sight of your soaked panties, lightly pinching your backside when you wiggled your ass to tempt him into giving you more. "...Such a needy thing, hold still. I'll give you what you so eagerly want." He'd whisper, more to himself rather than you as he quickly freed his cock and wasted no more time to pull your panties to the side before he stuffed you full in one thrust.

Yet the second he'd begin to move...he'd snap himself of his thoughts.

Now the elf was faced with a new task. To find a way to calm his raging hard-on, he refused to fall into the pit of temptation that he was so certain you were trying to lead him into.

extra note ; Continuing on my last point—

He's. A. Tsundere.

He's. Mean (with that hidden sweet side to spice it all up)

And not to expose myself but I fucking love mean men. And to be honest? I'll go a step further. THEY DON'T EVEN HAVE TO BE NICE??? During the Ridgeside quest line, the first two years of my playthrough revolved around J I O, and with every single mean dialogue he dished my way, I licked right up.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment? The romantic aspect)

I think of Jio as a half-in-half case. On most nights, he's super romantic and likes to treat your body as if it was gifted to him by Heaven itself (i.e If you're not confusing the moment for a Wattpad scene then he's thinking he hasn't done enough). On the flip side though, he'll ditch the romance if he's super pent-up or if you're explicitly asking for him to treat you a lil' more roughly.

♡ - His heart felt like it was close to bursting.

Within the dimly lit room of your shared bedroom, the soft sounds of your sexes meeting could be heard as he trusted up into you as you sat on his lap, the two of you sharing a hugging embrace as his cock twitched inside of you at the sound of your moans.

But, his orgasm was steadily becoming an afterthought as all Jio could focus on was you. After all that he had been through in his life, all the sacrifices he's made—

How could he be so lucky to be with you in this moment?

To have your love and attention?

"My love," He panted out, his voice uncharacteristically breathless and whiny as he nearly pleaded for your eyes to be on him. Shakily, you took your face from the crook in his neck to look at him, your hands sliding up his body until they cupped his face. And from that simple action alone, the elf had fallen deeper in love with you.

"Y-Yes" You responded to him, your face somehow warming even more as you looked into your husband's lovesick eyes. A small smile was on his smile and his cheeks as well as the tips of his ears appeared flushed.

Jio smiled as you caressed and held his cheeks before his face fell to rest in the valley between your breasts. "You're so pretty." He sighed dreamily.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation Headcanon)

He doesn't jerk off much, to be honest. (And to be honest? I feel like his libido doesn't really "activate" unless you're around him) Even when you two are in a relationship and I fully believe it's because 1. He's usually too busy/focused on his missions to think of rubbing one out or 2. He has you so if he's in the mood then he'll just go to you. But should you not be in the picture at the moment? He'll just get himself off to a piece of clothing that smells like you or his imagination.

♡ - "Fuuckk..." Jio whispered to himself as he sat on the edge of the bed, his hand slowly stroking his cock as he breathed in the smell of your scent from a shirt you left behind on the bed. The combination of that plus the imagination of your hands being the one on his dick rather than his own...it made for a pretty convincing moment that led him closer and closer to his orgasm.

It wasn't often that the elf masturbated. It wouldn't ever compare to the real thing.

But...when you said you'd be on Ginger Island for the next few days to attend to businesses there, he was expected to uphold the task of keeping things here on your farm in order.

And he'd do just that.

However, he didn't expect that his body would react so strongly to your absence. Even as his ministrations on himself slowly got faster and faster on his cock, going so far as to even spit on his dick to try and poorly imitate your slick and how it'd make your movements faster.

It was dull in comparison.

So dull that as his hands slowed and he came to a stop. All he felt was boredom. "...Yoba," He hissed in frustration.

He'd simply wait until you returned.

final note alert ; I saved my biggest thought bubble for the end so here we go-

Jio is the best-modded husband hands-down. Literally fight me on this. It's hard to convey my thoughts fully without giving concrete evidence (+ the fact that I'm going based off my memory since I haven't done a playthrough of the RSV questline in a lil' bit) but I think that anyone who's on the fence of RSV needs to give it a shot, even if it's just for Jio 💀. Like deadass, the whole reason I started this blog in the first place was to have a reason to rant about this man every now and again before it became a place for me to rant about hot people in general.

To reiterate, I'm biased as hell because I have a thing for elves and mean guys but seriously to anyone who reads this.

GIVE RSV A TRY.

Hot elf guy aside, the character stories in the mod are super good. Like I'd recommend Shiro, June, Ian etc. ANYDAY OF THE WEEK. I can't imagine my modded Stardew without Ridgeside Village so-

YEAH PLAY THE MOD SO I HAVE MORE PEOPLE TO RANT ABOUT THE HOT MEN WITH <33

［Stardew Valley ｜PMV］Smile

【星露谷物语｜全员向手书】 Smile（2025星露谷物语新春会单品）

Music：Smile by Dami Im

Forgot post this. Hpoe you Enjoy!

𝗦𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗽 𝗳𝗹𝗶𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗙𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗿!

Like literally the dude just have to flirt with my farmer everytime they passed each other and whats funny is that he tried it againt but this time infront of Aleia's husband.

Skit idea & OC Caspian by: @antifacatra

Sterling: So…what’s the key to winning you over? I’m ready for the challenge.

Caspian: *snorts at this*

Aleia: *laughs, clearly oblivious* Oh Sterl, another one of your jokes again?

Sterling: Well I heard you love yourself a motorcycle ride? Well I bet you that Sebs never taken you to the coastline, cutie. *winks*

Aleia: *chuckles* Good one but do you have to use me and Sebby as examples.

Sterling: Just messing with ya, Aleia~ *gives her a side hug*

Aleia: Well, I have to go now. I still have stuff to do at the farm. Bye! *walks out*

Caspian: *waits for her to leave out from earshot, looks at his bestfriend* Damn Sterling! You homewrecking bastard can’t keep your sights on a married woman? You outta betray my man, Sebby like this? Hell he even has a kid now. What’s the matter with you?

Sterling: Oh you love giving me shit, Casshole. Remind me how many older women have you tried to court in town?

Caspian: Well Robin comes to min-

Sterling: Exactly! You tried to fuck his mom, can’t blame you she’s got stuff. You’re no better than me a fellow horn dog of a man. You and I.