“Darling,” Her Crisp Accent Calls Me To Attention. “You Can Finish Your Chores Later. Come Here.”

"Oh, darling, no, I didn't mean it like that. It's perfect, honestly. You're exactly what I've been looking for.

Let me explain.

Do you have any idea how easy it is for me to find a guy with a big cock? Believe me, every guy I meet who's packing more than seven inches finds a way to let me know at the earliest opportunity. And, I won't lie, there are times when I've rewarded their boldness.

Oh, don't let my public persona fool you, dear. I enjoy a good shag as much as the next girl. And, when I'm in the mood, there's nothing quite like a tall, handsome, arrogant, well-endowed, hunk to hit that spot.

But, men like that tend to be a little... patriarchal, for me. As much as I might like a man to be dominant in the bedroom, when it comes to every day life, woe betide any man that tries to control Emma bloody Watson.

No, what I'm looking for in a partner is someone more... passive. Someone who'll let me take the lead. Someone who's not so full of macho entitlement, who'll submit to me and my authority.

And you, my small penised friend, strike me as exactly the sort of... person, I'm looking for.

So, if you're interested, follow me into the bedroom. I have something I'd like you to try on."