I Just Want A Man Above The Age Of 52 To Hug Me And Tell Me That Its Not My Fault :(

"together 💕" t. todoroki mha smau

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Summary: you, dabi, and my queen toga have plans you can't discuss or the haters will sabotage you 😈

Warnings: language, the usual smoking, you're finally in a relationship‼️

A/N: so so eepy

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"well damn" k. bakugo mha smau

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Summary: you try to contact your training partner! he lowkey hates you tho. good luck!

Warnings: vulgar language

A/N: i love music sm omg. PLEASE DONT MIND HOW HE BLOCKED YOU BEFORE YOU RESPONDED TO HIM ABOUT THE VEGGIES PLEASE IT WONT LET ME CHANGE IT.

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been a boner since I've had my first boner 🙋 (I have a coinslot)

true BONERS will reblog 👊👊👊

Every episode of house be like:

A small child is visibly ill. They start coughing and clutching their throat, but whips out an inhaler and they’re fine. Oh shit! The man across the street just started bleeding out of both of his eyeballs!

Cut to house grimacing in pain and swallowing too much Vicodin.

Differential! Go! Shut up chase you’re an idiot.

They do a bunch of tests, everything is inconclusive!

We need to biopsy the patients eyeballs!

Cut to foreman explaining to the family about how invasive and dangerous a biopsy is.

Biopsy is inconclusive. Cut to house and Wilson. Wilson gives a long introspective dialogue about how houses addiction is deeply rooted in his own self hatred and that he pushes people away to further punish himself.

Epiphany time! Give the patient the medicine drug!

Patient is saved. House and Wilson eye fuck each other while going out for drinks.

Trigger of Love- JAWNY

~First fan fic, lets goooo. Tell me if somethings off or my spelling needs to be changed, I crave feedback and validation. Have fun reading~ A/N

"I would never t-t-trick you, Y/n," His voice was tinted with disgust, possibly with hurt after what I had said to him.

"Goddammit, p-put down the gu-un for me?" He pleaded, neck twitching to the left, arms and hands shaking in the air. "I love you-"

"No. No, you manipulated me. You took advantage of me when I was at my weakest," It was my turn to look disgusted. I played with the safety catch, debating whether or not I should turn it off and shoot him.

"I loved you, I wanted to marry you," I laughed out, "and then I see your mugshot on that damn TV."

I tried to look into his hazel eyes, but they were covered by those stupid fucking orange goggles. He looked better without them, or his mask. He said he wore them because he was self conciseness of his looks, but now that I know what he's done, I don't think I believe him anymore.

He lowered his arms and tried to step closer, freezing when he heard a click. "Y/n-"

"Don't move any fucking closer," I point the gun at his head, finger already on the trigger. I stepped back, eyeing the hatchets that hung on his belt. I knew better than to turn away from a serial killer, but I could barely think, mind racing with the crimes he's done.

When I did I saw something that almost made my heart stop. More like someone, I guess.

"Sorry princess, nothing personal." And that was the last thing I saw before I felt like I got hit with a brick and passed out.

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"Damn Toby, you really got a good one."

"I'm aware, Brian."

"Holy shit, she looks good in those jeans."

"Tim, I will f-fucking decapitate you and feed y-y-your flesh to Seedeater."

Hii could you do a funny one between negan and Simon where they get drunk and they kiss by accident and both of them are just awkward about it but negan tells one of his jokes and they laugh it off

"Accidents Happen" n. smith Oneshot

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Summary (Fluff and Tension?): Simon and Negan get drunk after a long week of managing their communities, a tiny argument occurs, and ends with an accidental lip locking.

Warnings: Vulgar language, plenty uses of 'fuck', alcohol consumption, use of 'babe', teeny tiny spoiler but not really?

A/N: I'm so sorry I didn't get to this sooner 😭 I've had some stuff go down recently, so I've been busy with family matters and a bit of writers block for a couple of my works. But here we are, and I hope you like it! Flora doesn't exist, by the way, she's just a random name.

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It was four twenty-six in the morning, far too early for Negan and Simon to be awake. They both had a rough week trying to get Alexandria and the Hill-Top to comply with their demands, but of course, Rick likes to be rebellious.

He convinced the Hill-Top to stop giving them booze, for whatever reason that Negan didn’t care about, so the Saviors took all the alcohol from both communities as a ‘compromise.’ 

“Did he really?” Simon hiccuped from his chair in the make-shift conference room, pouring another glass of whiskey. Negan snorted and nodded his head.

“Yeah, kids got some fucking guts. I get why he’s Rick’s pride and joy, he’s pretty damn smart.” The two were talking about the countless times Carl outsmarted and talked back to Negan before there was a knock on the door. “The fuck do you want?”

“Uhm, Dr. Carson said he’s out of Aspirin. He needs someone to go on a run with him.” One of Negan’s wives slipped the door open a crack and gulped while staring into Negan’s cold eyes.

“So how about you send someone?” He raised an eyebrow and looked at his empty glass. When the woman left, he reached his hand over and grabbed Simon’s while he was drinking from it.

Simon stared at him while he chugged it down and tapped the glass on the table. Negan smiled at him and gestured towards the almost empty bottle with it.

“‘Nother hit, babe.” Simon only sighed and did what he told him to, just like always.

“I’m not your ‘babe.’” He screwed the cork back into the empty bottle and set it on the ground next to his chair, making sure not to knock it over.

Negan chuckled and lifted the glass to his chapped lips, locking eyes with Simon over the clear rim, “Right, and my name's not Negan.”

Simon scoffed and leaned back in his chair, remembering something he was supposed to tell Negan a while ago.

“Oh, you know Flora, at Hill-Top? Yeah, she uh,” He couldn’t help himself and let a laugh slip out while Negan set down the glass with a hard look in his eyes, “She thought I was gonna  fucking kill her the other day because she spilled paint on my shoes.”

“The blue paint?” Negan hummed and didn’t let his gaze leave Simon’s.

“Yeah.”

“The Hill-Top doesn’t have painters there.”

Moments of silence were shared between the men. They didn’t look away from each other, and Simon subconsciously covered the paint on his shoe with his other.

“What?”

“They don’t have painters there, Simon. They have farmers, and that’s all that those dickweeds spend their time doing. Those dumpster people, though? They’ve got painters. A lot of fucking painters. So many, in fact, that if you set foot in their community you’re bound to get some on you.”

Negan leaned forward until he was face to face with Simon, his whiskey breath flooding the man’s nostrils. “The same damn community that I told you to stop fucking seeing.”

Simon took in an angry breath, “I didn’t see them.”

“Are you lying to me, Simon?” 

“No.” His voice was just above a whisper, and another knock on the door ensued.

“Negan, we just wanted to confirm that you’re okay with us taking Dr. Carson to the hospital a couple miles away?” A man asked, looking between the two drunk men. Simon’s face was red, whether it be from anger, the alcohol, or something else, and so was Negan’s. 

“Get your tiny little ass outta here, and take the limp dick doctor with you!” Negan shouted and turned his head to look at the guy.

Spooked, the man nodded his head and quickly closed the door.

With the guy gone, Negan and Simon both turned their heads to look at each other, about to say an assumable insult at the other, when they realized they were a bit too close.

Their lips locked, and they both held still. Negan pulled away first, an unreadable expression on his face that Simon couldn’t pinpoint. He, on the other hand, had wide eyes and a light look of fear in them.

They didn’t say anything to each other, just staring at or though each other.

“This doesn’t make us gay, does it?”

“If it does, I’m totally putting you in a dress and making you one of my wives.” Negan raised his eyebrows playfully and grabbed his glass, downing the last bit of whiskey in it.

Simon snickered and shook his head, glad that his boss didn’t resent him. “How about we keep that between us?”

“Agreed. Accidents happen.” Negan groaned, stood up, and stretched. 

“Hittin’ the hay if you wanna come join me.” He winked and picked Lucille up from the table, slinging her over his shoulder.

“Nah, I’m good. Don’t wanna steal you from the girls.” Simon stood up as well, grabbing the empty glass bottle. 

“Offer's always open.” Negan smirked and made his way towards the door, leaving his right-hand man in the conference room alone.

Simon hummed and listened to his footsteps weaken until he couldn’t hear Negan, set the bottle on the table, and put his hands in his pockets while staring at the door.

Was it an accident, though?

"surprise?" t. todoroki mha smau

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Summary: You just wanted to go to the gas station 😔

Warnings: language?, smoking

A/N: so I actually hate the dishes much more than I ever realized. this ones also kind of short

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absolutely seething because I can never find any good fanfiction for a girl who isn’t some timid little fuck puppet. Like I get that some girls are hyper feminine but oh my god I just need a reader who can kick ass and hold their own. I’m not 4 foot 2 and 3 pounds I’m a decent sized female who could easily fill out the shirts of men I thirst over. I’m not cutely strolling into the room in my little pink sundress and white sandals, no dude I’m stomping into that room in jeans and a t shirt combat boots and saying the most disgusting dick joke you’ve ever heard. Sorry guys I’m not a girly girl

"weed or us?" "weed!" t. todoroki mha smau

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Summary: someone stole from you 🤫

Warnings: idfk some vulgar language and weed?

A/N: we're doing this ig. dabi does not know the difference between "two" and "too." you both are also flirty with each other and it will escalate as stories go on. also I made a mistake with smth twice says, don't mind it 🤗

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"Inseparable" Part Ten

Patrick groaned when Y/N shot up from her spot on the couch gasping and tightly gripping his forearm. He smacked his lips as he looked around the room trying to gather what was going on.

“The fuck’s your problem?” He whispered, squinting his eyes through the dark. Y/N whipped her head around to look at him and hugged onto him tightly, burying her face in his neck.

Patrick was too tired to care, though, and stayed in his seated position with his arms on his sides, blinking the sleep away from his eyes.

He looked back at her after scanning the room and sat motionless for a moment, right before plopping his face into her hair and going back to sleep as Y/N sobbed and cried.

A little while later, she wiped her nose on his bare shoulder and grimaced at the line of snot she left on it. She sat up when she heard birds chirping, and the faintest bit of sun poking through her window, contrasting with the rest of the pitch black room. Sighing, she shifted to move away from Patrick right before she heard a loud thump and groaning.

“The fuck is your problem?” Patrick hissed from his new position on what Y/N assumed was the floor.

She snorted a bit and pulled her shirt back down, why it was raised past her breasts and exposing her bra made her concerned, but she didn’t want to know what Patrick was up to. She smacked her lips as Patrick had done in an earlier time and rubbed the sleep away from her eyes. 

“Ah, fuck!” Patrick yelled after yet another thump, and plopped himself onto the spot on the couch next to her holding his foot. The sun had risen more so she could see the room, and she bursted into full laughter when she realized he stubbed his toe on the coffee table in front of them.

“It’s not that fucking funny.” He grumbled, his hand massaging his toes.

“Oh, yes it is.” Y/N wiped away the tears that formed from her outburst and let out shaky breaths before calming down.

“Oh, yes it is.” Patrick mocked in a snarky tone and put his feet on the coffee table, knocking over the TV remote.

Y/N deadpanned at him and they stared at each other for a couple seconds before he realized that she wanted him to pick it up. He only grinned and moved his legs to sit criss-cross.

“Jackass.” Y/N mumbled, standing up to bend over and pick it up. Patrick wolf-whistled, grabbing his crotch and putting his arm on the back of the couch.

“Damn, is it hot in here, or is it just me?” He licked his lips, smiling when she tossed the remote at him. Y/N sat back down and made a disgusted sound.

“So what now.” Y/N said, crossing her hands in her lap and staring at the floor. 

“We could talk about whatever the fuck you were dreaming about.” Patrick turned his head to look at her, and he stared at her while she inspected her carpet.

Y/N was silent, eyes unmoving. It unnerved Patrick deeply to see her so quiet, and he was incredibly curious as to why she was. 

“Let’s make pancakes.”