Hi, how's everyone? Sorry I've been so absent, I had to take a break. Sometimes that happens, but don't worry, I'll be back. I hope you like it
Previous chapters: CHAPTER I / CHAPTER II / / CHAPTER III, CHAPTER IV e CHAPTER V / Chapter VI e Chapter VII / Chapter VIII e Chapter IX / Chapter X, Chapter XI, Chapter XII e Chapter XIII
Hades relaxed back against his chair just in time for Maria to enter the room and so everyone began to eat. It was as if none of that had happened as the platters of food were passed around the table and some more arrived from the kitchen.
This was a moment Nico hadn't expected to witness. He leaned back in his chair and picked up his glass of wine, closing his eyes as he felt the sweet and slightly bitter liquid go down his throat. He had eaten so much that he thought he would explode, making him sluggish and sleepy. That must be why he felt so good and so free. He knew he shouldn't be so relaxed, so comfortable with Percy in the middle of his family, and most importantly, he shouldn't accept without question the easy way Percy mingled with them. The conversation flowed so naturally that it was like this dinner was a common occurrence between all of them; Percy's arm on his chair, keeping them close, and the fingers that still caressed the back of his neck in that soft and gentle way lulled him without him even realizing it, while Percy's nails massaging him made everything seem even more natural. And so, finally realizing what was happening, Nico found himself wrapped in that tranquility and contentment that he hadn't felt before Percy appeared in his life, like this was another common thing between them. Even Hades, who had been rude before, seemed not to care about the display of affection.
“… thing. I never would have guessed that.” Percy said beside Nico, close to his ear, the husky murmur caressing his nerves. “What a brave little boy.”
Percy squeezed Nico's shoulders and he felt himself grow warm. Nico just wanted them to stop telling stories about his childhood, there was nothing special about it.
“He was the cutest child in the world. So righteous and innocent.” Bianca continued.
“Really? Tell me more.” Percy raised his own glass of wine to his lips and looked at Nico playfully. But there was something in his eyes. Nico never knew when Percy was been serious.
“Please, no.” It was his turn to murmur.
“Ah, but I have to tell him.”
“Bianca, I beg you!”
Bianca just smiled at Nico, all satisfied and leaned towards him and Percy. The truth is that everyone at the table was a little drunk and since Hades made the wine, he liked it very strong.
“No, I insist.” Percy murmured beside him, perhaps a little closer than necessary, a little hoarsely, too. Well, it was to be expected, they had been laughing for over half an hour. At his expense, of course. Apparently he was a very creative child. And brave. And cute. And innocent. The adjectives were endless.
“So, it happened like this. Hazel was still very little, you know? We still lived in Italy.”
“Please.” Nico begged once more.
“She didn't even realize that the other kids were being mean.”
“I promise to do your laundry for a week!”
“Nico saw this and--” She continued, her face red from the wine.
“One month. No, two--”
“Shhh…” That's when he felt Percy approaching him again. He… Percy placed his index finger on Nico's lips and said very quietly: “Your sister is talking. Be a good boy.”
Nico was unable to disobey. The air fled from his lungs, but unlike what had happened before, it was thought they were suddenly very full, so hot that Nico felt like he was being scorched. The strangest thing about this was that no one seemed to find it strange. Not Percy's arm around his shoulders or his rough fingers against his lips, much less the way that their chairs, for some mysterious reason, were much closer than before, seeming that with each passing moment the distance between them was decreasing.
Half-airy and light, still hearing the words “good boy”, Nico watched Bianca continue to tell her little anecdote of a little boy defending his defenseless little sister through punches. And on top of that, winning the fight.
“I remember that!” Hazel said. She pushed her chair back and stood up, beaming with happiness. “We have pictures!”
“No!” Nico said, defeated.
“Yes!” Hazel exclaimed.
With no other choice left, Hazel left the table and ran upstairs without looking back.
“Percy!” But Nico was laughing, hiding his face in Percy's shoulder, feeling like he was going to melt from embarrassment or bury his head in the ground like an ostrich.
“It’s okay,” Percy told him, the smile in his voice making him relax. “I promise not to hold it against you.”
A kiss was placed on the side of his face and Nico melted completely. He couldn't remember the last time someone had kissed him like that, full of affection and without expecting anything in return. Nico had to lift his head and look back at Percy. When Nico had first met him, it hadn't occurred to him that Percy Jackson could be someone so kind and loving, yet somewhat shameless. Raising his hand, Nico placed it on Percy's face and--
— Nico Di Ângelo! — An angry voice echoed through the room.
The front door slammed against the wall and there stood the person Nico least expected to see, someone he had completely forgotten about. Will Solace was there. Yes, Will, his boyfriend, the person he should be smiling with, the person Nico should be touching with so much affection and care, but never had the desire to do so.
Everyone looked at Will and, too late, Nico realized that Percy was still holding him by the shoulders and he still had his hands on Percy's face. He saw in slow motion Will march towards them and stop in front of the table, only then realizing that he shouldn't be touching Percy, much less in front of his boyfriend. He looked back at Percy and let his hands rest on his strong shoulders, still unprepared to let go.
What… what was he doing?
“I'm sorry.” Nico said to Percy. For some reason Nico addressed Percy and not Will. The truth is that he felt bad, he felt strange, all that drama made him feel like he was betraying Percy, which only made him more confused.
“What the hell are you doing! And who is this guy?”
“I-- I… this… this is Percy Jackson.” He mumbled weakly, not knowing what to say. “And this is Will Solace, my… my boyfriend.”
“What the fuck, Nico!” Will got closer to where he was and yelled in his face. “Come with me, now!”
Nico didn't know what to do, so he went. He stood up and looked one last time at Percy and his family who were watching everything in bewilderment, letting Will grab him by the arm and drag him away. He even heard his mother say "Oh my!" That is, until he realized that Percy wasn't going to let go. He looked at Percy and saw that the man was frowning, looking at him with concern. "Is that your boyfriend?"
“What's that got to do with you? Don't you think you're a little old to be hanging around little boys?”
He couldn't believe what he was hearing! Nico gasped and stood in front of them.
“It's okay, we'll talk--”
Percy stood up and straightened his spine, puffing out his chest in a way Nico had never seen him do before. Percy stopped in front of Will and looked down at him, the blond boy looking so small and helpless next to the nearly seven-foot tall man that it almost made Nico laugh.
“I'm sorry, I don't think I understood. Can you repeat that?” Percy said. He smiled at Will and kept Nico behind him. Nico could imagine how threatening Percy was now.
Will swallowed hard, but stared back at Percy, his grip on Nico's arm tightening.
“That's what you heard, old man.”
“You better let Nico go. He doesn't want to talk to you.”
“Who do you think--”
“If I were you, I would be careful with your next words.”
With that the room fell silent, Will and Percy staring at each other and their family frozen where they sat.
Percy was the first to break the tension. He turned to Nico and gently held him on the shoulder, leaned in until he was very close to his ear and whispered:
“Are you sure he’s your boyfriend?” Nico just looked at Percy, feeling like laughing for some reason, watching Percy laugh back at him. “He feels like an older brother. I don’t see any love or attraction, or affection coming from him. And if that’s how he treats you… why are you still with him?”
Nico felt himself burn under Percy's intense gaze and instead of answering him, he pushed Percy's shoulder lightly, not really wanting to move away, looking at him disapprovingly and muttering so that only Percy could hear: “You're doing this on purpose. I'll be right back.”
So, Nico walked away from Percy, ignoring that little smile that was already very familiar to him, and went outside where Will was waiting for him.
***
As soon as Nico turned his back on them, being pulled by his boyfriend and dragged by the arm, Percy turned around and faced that family that five minutes ago seemed to be the best in the world compared to his. Now, he wasn't so sure. Whether it was the way Nico's older brothers went back to eating, just looking at their plates or the sad way Maria Di Ângelo looked through the door where Nico had left, the worst thing was definitely looking at Hades and seeing the resigned expression on his rough and tired face.
Percy sat down at the table and put his hand to his temples, feeling a headache coming on. He filled his glass with more wine and downed it in one go. Why was he so worried? Why did he feel so possessive? In the end, Will Solace was right, this was none of his business, none of it was.
Even so, Percy turned to Hades, giving him a disapproving look. Hades looked at him and it was then that he realized, the man would do nothing to stop something bad from happening to Nico.
Percy didn't believe that! He would do anything for Alice and Logan, he would never let other people abuse them, much less offer them up on a golden platter, handing them over to the dogs. Percy took a deep breath and tried to ignore the tension in the air, so strong it could be cut with a knife. However, it didn't take long for a murderous expression to form on the patriarch's face; not even thirty seconds later they heard furious shouts coming from outside the house. The clearest were "You're mine! Acting like a whore won't solve things" and "Is it because of him that you don't want to marry me?"
Everyone remained in a somber silence that was only broken when Hazel entered the room, her shoes making noise against the wooden floor. Hades grimaced in disgust and he couldn't take it anymore, downing the third glass of wine in less than two minutes.
“You know, I may like fancy cars and innocent little boys, but I would never do that to Nico.”
“As if you were different.” Hades tells him.
“I would never call Nico those things and I would never force him to do anything he doesn't want to do. Can you say the same about Will? If I were you, I would be careful about who you let into your home.”
Hades made another face, as if he had eaten something bitter, but Percy didn't care, he got up from the table and went after Nico.
If it had been anyone else in his place, he would have said that the scene he found when he opened the door was something out of a murder movie about to happen, or perhaps the beginning of physical abuse. He couldn't decide, especially if it was the way Will was looking at Nico, with so much anger and disgust, practically pressing him against the wall; Will even had his fist slightly raised, close to his body, his hand clenched and tense. Nico, on the other hand, seemed to have given up on fighting back and was just trying to defend himself with his hands over his face.
Percy couldn't wait any longer, he walked over to Nico and stood in their midst, running when he saw what was about to happen. However, Percy had to stop before he reached him, coming across something he never expected to see; the little boy who had seemed so brave and courageous was now huddled against the wall, trying to make himself smaller, crying so hard that he was sobbing.
He did the only thing he could in a situation like this. He approached slowly and tried to talk to him, without scaring him.
“Nico? It's me, Percy.”
“I'm sorry! I didn't-- I didn't--” Nico screamed with all the strength he could muster and raised his hands, trying to keep the threat away from him, soon after shrinking even further against the wall and crouching on the floor, covering his head with his hands.
“It's okay. Tell me what happened, hmm?”
“Oh.” Nico said softly, almost without strength.
With a broken sob, Nico raised his head and looked at him, his face twisted with pain. Nico didn't say a word, he just stood up quickly and jumped against Percy, hugging him desperately and crying even harder.
“Shhh… what’s wrong? No need to cry, you’re safe.”
“Per…” Another hiccup and the first sniff.
“Come on, it's okay. Don't you trust me?”
Nico nodded, his face all wet and swollen, trying to smile, relaxing a little more. At least Percy now knew Nico wouldn't have a panic attack.
“Do you want to talk?”
Nico denies it and stays exactly where he was, curled up against Percy's chest and with his eyes squeezed shut, trying to control the sobs that were slowly fading away. Only when he was sure that Nico wouldn't lose control again did he look at the boyfriend. Big piece of shit. A selfish and spoiled little boy, from what he could see. And who apparently didn't even care if Nico suffered or not.
Percy didn't do anything other than hug Nico, he didn't move to give that kid what he deserved or try to call for help, Will didn't do anything either, looking at him like he wanted to kill him, ignoring Nico who finally stopped crying. In the end, he was the one who had lost; it was Percy who held Nico in his arms, it was Percy who slowly caressed his back and it was Percy who comforted him. Will should give up while he still had time.
See you next time!
Hi, how are you? This will be the last chapter of the year, we'll be back on January 6th, although we'll still have posts on writing tips in Portuguese this week (because there are plenty in English) and another post on the creative prompt.
I hope you enjoy this chapter.
Previous chapters: CHAPTER I / CHAPTER II / CHAPTER III / CHAPTER IV / CHAPTER V / CHAPTER VI / CHAPTER VII / CHAPTER VIII / CHAPTER IX / CHAPTER X / CHAPTER XI / CHAPTER XII / CHAPTER XIII / CHAPTER XIV / CHAPTER XV / CHAPTER XVI / CHAPTER XVII / CHAPTER XVIII / CHAPTER XIX / CHAPTER XX / CHAPTER XXI / CHAPTER XXII / CHAPTER XXIII / CHAPTER XXIV / CHAPTER XXV /CHAPTER XXVI
Percy slowly moved away from the bed and walked towards the wardrobe. He still couldn't believe what he had done. Nico wasn't like Luke, or like any other boy, where Percy would have some fun and then leave, without caring about the consequences. No, with Nico, extra care was necessary, he needed time and attention, to be treated in the right way and at the right pace so that in his haste, Percy wouldn't ruin everything. That was why he couldn't let himself get carried away like that, having more fun than he should with Nico's reaction and discomfort, watching Nico get more excited with each passing moment without even knowing what he was doing.
Did Nico realize how easily he could enter that state of submission? His pupils dilated, his face flushed, and even his posture changed, bowing slightly, the mood changing drastically as Nico transformed into that completely obedient and sweet being, something even the other people around him noticed. The worst? Percy transformed with him, bringing out his worst side.
Thankfully, all of this has been put on hold for the time being. Percy made sure to keep those memories inside the box Apollo had given him, along with the collar and the other objects. In the meantime, he kept the box on top of the desk next to the bed, out of sight but close enough if they decided to take it a step further than they were both comfortable at the moment.
"Per?" It was Nico who called him, the only one who used that nickname or said his name so sweetly.
Nico was sitting on the bed, fingering his necklace with the same hand that held his engagement ring. He had that same lost look and flushed face, even though they had just showered and gotten dressed for school. Percy decided to ignore the urge to pin Nico against the bed and give them what they both wanted, and just smiled, content to watch Nico.
"What's wrong, baby?”
"We... is everything okay?”
"Of course it is.”
"So why haven't you touched me since... since the collar?”
Percy stopped and thought, “Hm. That was true.” It hadn’t been a conscious thing or to punish Nico. Percy just thought it would be good to have a few moments to breathe a little.
"Don't worry, hmm ? Give me a kiss.”
Percy walked back to the bed and knelt between Nico's legs, getting to his height, and kissed him. Something sweet and soft. Percy didn't intend to turn the kiss into anything more than a passing caress. The problem was Nico and his sweet moans, the way he parted his lips and gasped, wrapping his legs around Percy’s wais, pulling him up, inviting him to lie on top of Nico. When Percy saw it, he had grabbed Nico by the hair and rubbed his tongue against Nico's, swallowing his moans.
Moving away from Nico was like surfacing after long hours of swimming, he felt like he could go on for a while longer, but that it wouldn't be good for him if he tried it. So he pulled his lips away from Nico's, took a deep breath and slowly moved his head away. He propped one knee on the edge of the bed and inhaled, forcing his heart to beat at a normal pace. And Nico? He was lying down, sprawled in the middle of the sheets, breathing just as deeply as he was, but completely happy and content to stay exactly where he was, blinking slowly as he watched Percy walk away.
It seems like he would have to be the adult there.
Percy practically threw himself out of bed, then grabbed Nico's shoes and put them on Nico's feet, tying the laces. He got up, went to the wardrobe and grabbed their jackets. He helped Nico sit on the bed and finally put one of them on Nico who just raised his arms, allowing himself to be dressed.
If he could, Percy would stay home today and make sure Nico stayed in his happy, content bubble of pleasure. That is, if it weren't for the exams coming up. They had studied too hard to let everything be ruined now.
"You didn't have to do that." Nico said, his face heating up, seeming to come back to reality.
Percy just looked at him and smiled, picking up their bags from the floor, Nico's guitar, and took Nico's hand that was now reluctantly dragging itself across the carpet, Percy guiding him out of the room towards the exit door.
***
Percy sat down on the bench and closed his eyes for a moment. Preparation for finals was starting and the teachers were determined to make his life miserable. Seven papers, surprise tests and group presentations, everything he didn't need right now. If he could just have a moment to catch his breath he was sure that—
"... cy ? Percy!”
"Hm?”
"You didn't listen to anything I said!”
Percy tried not to roll his eyes, but it seemed to be in vain. Luke was trying to say something that must be very important, Percy was sure. Something about the team, or probably about graduation. In fact, in his absence, Luke was proving to be a great leader, a good friend and someone he could trust even if the jealousy always got the better of him.
"I know you're busy with Nico and the future of your perfect life. But can you pay attention to me?”
Percy smiled at Luke and hugged him around the neck, reminding him of the thousands of nights where loneliness made him seek refuge in those same arms, but that no matter how hard Luke tried, it would never be enough for Percy. The reality is that beneath the flirting and fun, Luke was just another person looking for a place to belong.
"You don't need me. You never did.”
"Percy! I'm serious.”
“Me too,” Percy said. He turned to Luke and cupped his face, admiring him in a way Percy rarely did. It was a shame he already loved Nico. Luke deserved someone who loved him as much as he loved Nico. “I’m quitting the team this week.”
"What? Why now? So close to graduation?”
"It's a surprise. I'm not going to go to college here.”
"You can't drop everything because of him!”
"I received a good offer in Italy.”
"Are you sure? You tried so hard.”
“You deserve it more than me.”
"Me? What do I have to do with this?" Luke pulled away, leaning back, and scratched his head, completely confused.
"You'll make a great captain.”
“I…” Luke stuttered and stopped talking, and Percy could see real emotion flash across Luke's face for the first time in a while. “You don’t have to quit the team. We need you if we want to win.”
"Hm. Maybe. If you insist.”
***
In the end, Percy was defeated by sheer exhaustion, he would be vice captain while Luke would take his place. The coach seemed proud of them for some reason, and nothing really seemed to change, even though he didn't go to all the practices anymore. Without the practices, Percy had more time to talk to his mother and plan the next steps, like college and marriage. A house. But without Nico realizing that something very drastic was happening.
"Come to the next training practice.”
"Do I really need to?" Percy said to Luke and then turned to Grover who was beside him, hugging Juniper. Grover shrugged and Juniper smiled, the cheerleader just hugged Grover tighter and rested her head on his shoulder.
"The first game is in eight days. Please.”
"Just because you asked nicely.”
Percy ruffled Luke's hair, and Luke stood up, taking his bag and the clipboard with him. He watched Luke march out of the courtyard and saw Nico appear shortly after with his bag and guitar slung over his shoulder. An unusual sight. Nico would be at band practice at this time, getting ready for his performance at the prom, not here, looking like a puppy abandoned on the side of the road. Before Nico could disappear into the crowd of teenagers, Percy ran towards him, grabbing Nico by the shoulder, turning him towards himself.
“What happened?”
Percy could tell immediately that something was wrong. He touched Nico's face and turned it towards him, moving it in different angles. He felt around Nico's neck and ran his fingers down Nico's shoulders, finding nothing wrong. That is, until Nico looked at him through his eyelashes and blinked slowly in his direction.
"Nothing happened. Today's practice was canceled. The teacher was absent. Everyone was going out to eat... I rather stay here.”
"What happened on the way here?”
"It was nothing, I swear.”
Percy thought about continuing with his questions, but then he remembered his promise not to question Nico's actions. He would trust his baby.
"Do you want to rest a little or do you want to go home?”
He knew it wasn't fair, testing how dependent Nico really was on him. Imagine his relief when he saw Nico stop and think for a few seconds, his eyebrows furrowing and a pout of concentration appearing on his lips. Nico was taking a huge weight off Percy's shoulders without even knowing it; not because it was hard for Percy to keep deciding everything for the two of them, but because, this way, Percy knew he wasn't hurting Nico in any way or deepening any kind of trauma.
"Can we rest a little and then study?”
Percy groaned, already regretting asking. Nico could deny it, but he loved torturing him with endless study sessions. Percy was sure of it.
"Seriously? Is that all you think about?”
All Nico did was laugh, all delicate, and hold onto the strap of his backpack, acting cute and innocent.
"What's the problem? It'll be good for you. This way, we'll be training for college. "Nico continued smiling, using a very soft and gentle voice, and held his hands, making him forget the complaint that was about to come.
See? And then people called him manipulative and cold. That's because they never paid attention to what Nico did. Percy smiled back and took the backpack and guitar from Nico's shoulder, walking towards the benches in the open courtyard. He knew how much Nico liked to lie in the sunlight.
It was not a common sight, him sitting on the bench in the middle of the courtyard and Nico with his head in his lap. Nico had his eyes closed and was breathing calmly, while Percy massaged his hair, slowly and carefully, touching his small, soft ears, his long neck, the fragrant nape of his neck.
"Stop looking at me like that." Nico said with his eyes still closed, although Percy could feel his face between his hands slowly warming up.
"How am I looking at you?”
"Like I would run away.”
"That's not why I'm looking at you." Percy continued touching Nico's skin, running his fingers down Nico's neck, and stopping with his hand on the choker, finally leaning over Nico, kissing him softly on the leather. Percy raises his lips and finds that piece of skin, right behind Nico's ear, which makes the boy shiver from head to toe.
Of course this is the moment where Luke yells for them to find a room.
“Where did he come from?” Nico says, and something in his voice makes Percy stop and look at him, seeing Nico open his eyes softly. Percy could force himself to believe that nothing was wrong, but... it was so obvious. “I saw you hugging Luke.”
So, that was it.
"He's just a friend.”
"I don't like this." At this moment, Nico really looked at him and emphasized every word. "Just a friend? Just like he was when I was in Italy, is that it?”
"Wow." Percy was speechless. It was kind of funny, even if deep down Nico was right. Any friend could have become more when Nico was on the other side of the world and Percy was there, alone and lonely.
"Wasn't that what you did?”
“You’re right,” Percy said, trying to calm his fussy baby. “I didn’t know this was a problem.”
"You didn't act any different than me when I told you about my ex-boyfriend.”
Hm. That was true. As always, Nico was right.
Percy thought about justifying himself and saying that they were angry for different reasons. He didn't understand why Nico had to go looking for sex on the other side of the world and Nico didn't like that Percy had tried to replace him with the first person who appeared.
"I'm so sorry, baby. I swear that's in the past. I promise it won't happen again.”
“Have you had sex with other people or touching your “friends” is something usual?”
This time, Percy couldn't hold it in. He threw his head back and laughed. Gods! He missed Nico so much, the senseless jealousy and obsession they both had for each other. Even though he understood it was wrong, it was like coming home after a long, tiring day.
"Both. I won't do either without your consent.”
Then the cutest thing happened. Like the baby that Nico was, he pouted and puffed out his cheeks, showing his displeasure, and then he turned to the side, hiding his face in Percy’s belly.
"Sometimes I hate you. I hate this feeling that eats away inside of me. I want you all to myself. I know you do these things on purpose!" Nico raised his voice and sank even deeper into his lap, rubbing himself against Percy a little too much.
Now, who was doing what they shouldn't have done on purpose?
"Baby, I swear. I didn't do this--”
"Percy, it's been a while.”
Damn! Did she have to show up right now?
For a moment the voices around the courtyard seemed to fall silent, and there was a strange silence, as if the other people had frozen in place to listen better and see what would happen. Even Nico seemed to stop breathing, tensing in his arms and turning his back to Annabeth . And just when he said he wouldn't do those things...
"Per-cy!”
"You don't need to shout, everyone can hear you." He murmured, trying to ease the situation.
"When are you going to get tickets to the dance?”
"I don't know what you're talking about.”
"Don't you remember? You promised.”
"Only in your dreams.”
Percy couldn't help but look down and see that Nico was already staring at him, furious, a look so determined that he knew he would have to make amends. He barely realized that he was still holding Nico's hair and necklace, still with his fingers on Nico's skin, possessive and protective. The biggest surprise came next, Nico grabbed his hands and pulled them away from him, struggling to get up, trying to run away from him once again.
That was enough for Percy to spring into action. Percy pushed Nico back, and turned him around, making him sit on his lap, once again with his back to Annabeth .
"Where do you think you're going, hm?”
"I thought you wanted to talk to your friends.”
Oh, so much hurt, so much jealousy, so bitter. Would he be a horrible person just for knowing that Nico cared so much, even if it was through such bad emotions?
“Baby?”
“What is it?!”
Percy lifted Nico's head, who refused to look at him, and got closer to his ear, so that only Nico could hear:
"I love you. Only you and no one else.”
"Liar!”
"I would never spoil anyone the way I spoil you. I would never indulge your every whim or allow myself to be so vulnerable if I didn't love you. You know what else I would never do?”
"What?" This time, Nico's voice came out much lower, almost a whisper.
"I would never fuck you like I do to you. I would never accept submission from anyone other than you. Why would I choose anyone else when the most perfect, obedient thing is right in front of me. Hm? Answer me.”
Nico pulled back just enough to look at him, his face and ears now on fire. His attitude completely different than it had been five minutes ago.
"I... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say those things. I just…”
"I should punish you. I should show you what naughty boys deserve.”
The moment would have been comical if Percy hadn't been so turned on, and apparently, Nico was too; he could feel the small bulge against his lower belly, and the way Nico moaned and held onto his shoulders would have told him what was going on anyway.
"Now, how are you going to apologize?”
"Apologize?" Nico looked confused, but even so, he moved closer to him, pressing their bodies together and hugging him by the neck.
Nico only needed a little push and their lips were connecting. Their tongues soon met and a breathy moan followed. Unfortunately, Percy couldn't let things go too far, after all they were still in public, and his baby was too good for those predatory eyes, looking for the next gossip.
Percy grabbed Nico by the back of his neck and pulled their mouths apart, watching Nico gasp as if they had done much more than just share a quick kiss. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to leave Nico without sex for too long.
"How about we go home, hm? Take a relaxing bath? I promise we'll study as much as you want tomorrow.”
Nico just nodded, blinking slowly. He helped Nico pick up his bags, and when he stood up, Annabeth was still standing in the middle of the path, closer than Percy would have liked her to be. Well, that didn't matter. As long as Annabeth didn't intrude on his life, she could do whatever she wanted, even if it meant watching him like a hawk.
para saber lidar com o silêncio das coisas.
SO HERE IS THE WHOLE STORY (SO FAR).
I am on my knees begging you to reblog this post and to stop reblogging the original ones I sent out yesterday. This is the complete account with all the most recent info; the other one is just sending people down senselessly panicked avenues that no longer lead anywhere.
IN SHORT
Cliff Weitzman, CEO of Speechify and (aspiring?) voice actor, used AI to scrape thousands of popular, finished works off AO3 to list them on his own for-profit website and in his attached app. He did this without getting any kind of permission from the authors of said work or informing AO3. Obviously.
When fandom at large was made aware of his theft and started pushing back, Weitzman issued a non-apology on the original social media posts—using
his dyslexia;
his intent to implement a tip-system for the plagiarized authors; and
a sudden willingness to take down the work of every author who saw my original social media posts and emailed him individually with a ‘valid’ claim,
as reasons we should allow him to continue monetizing fanwork for his own financial gain.
When we less-than-kindly refused, he took down his ‘apologies’ as well as his website (allegedly—it’s possible that our complaints to his web host, the deluge of emails he received or the unanticipated traffic brought it down, since there wasn’t any sort of official statement made about it), and when it came back up several hours later, all of the work formerly listed in the fan fiction category was no longer there.
THE TAKEAWAYS
1. Cliff Weitzman (aka Ofek Weitzman) is a scumbag with no qualms about taking fanwork without permission, feeding it to AI and monetizing it for his own financial gain;
2. Fandom can really get things done when it wants to, and
3. Our fanworks appear to be hidden, but they’re NOT DELETED from Weitzman’s servers, and independently published, original works are still listed without the authors' permission. We need to hold this man responsible for his theft, keep an eye on both his current and future endeavors, and take action immediately when he crosses the line again.
THE TIMELINE, THE DETAILS, THE SCREENSHOTS (behind the cut)
Sunday night, December 22nd 2024, I noticed an influx in visitors to my fic You & Me & Holiday Wine. When I searched the title online, hoping to find out where they came from, a new listing popped up (third one down, no less):
This listing is still up today, by the way, though now when you follow the link to word-stream, it just brings you to the main site. (Also, to be clear, this was not the cause for the influx of traffic to my fic; word-stream did not link back to the original work anywhere.)
I followed the link to word-stream, where to my horror Y&M&HW was listed in its entirety—though, beyond the first half of the first chapter, behind a paywall—along with a link promising to take me—through an app downloadable on the Apple Store—to an AI-narrated audiobook version. When I searched word-stream itself for my ao3 handle I found both of my multi-chapter fics were listed this way:
Because the tags on my fics (which included genres* and characters, but never the original IPs**) weren’t working, I put ‘Kara Danvers’ into the search bar and discovered that many more supercorp fics (Supergirl TV fandom, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor pairing) were listed.
I went looking online for any mention of word-stream and AI plagiarism (the covers—as well as the ridiculously inflated number of reviews and ratings—made it immediately obvious that AI fuckery was involved), but found almost nothing: only one single Reddit post had been made, and it received (at that time) only a handful of upvotes and no advice.
I decided to make a tumblr post to bring the supercorp fandom up to speed about the theft. I draw as well as write for fandom and I’ve only ever had to deal with art theft—which has a clear set of steps to take depending on where said art was reposted—and I was at a loss regarding where to start in this situation.
After my post went up I remembered Project Copy Knight, which is worth commending for the work they’ve done to get fic stolen from AO3 taken down from monetized AI 'audiobook’ YouTube accounts. I reached out to @echoekhi, asking if they’d heard of this site and whether they could advise me on how to get our works taken down.
While waiting for a reply I looked into Copy Knight’s methods and decided to contact OTW’s legal department:
And then I went to bed.
By morning, tumblr friends @makicarn and @fazedlight as well as a very helpful tumblr anon had seen my post and done some very productive sleuthing:
@echoekhi had also gotten back to me, advising me, as expected, to contact the OTW. So I decided to sit tight until I got a response from them.
That response came only an hour or so later:
Which was 100% understandable, but still disappointing—I doubted a handful of individual takedown requests would accomplish much, and I wasn’t eager to share my given name and personal information with Cliff Weitzman himself, which is unavoidable if you want to file a DMCA.
I decided to take it to Reddit, hoping it would gain traction in the wider fanfic community, considering so many fandoms were affected. My Reddit posts (with the updates at the bottom as they were emerging) can be found here and here.
A helpful Reddit user posted a guide on how users could go about filing a DMCA against word-stream here (to wobbly-at-best results)
A different helpful Reddit user signed up to access insight into word-streams pricing. Comment is here.
Smells unbelievably scammy, right? In addition to those audacious prices—though in all fairness any amount of money would be audacious considering every work listed is accessible elsewhere for free—my dyscalculia is screaming silently at the sight of that completely unnecessary amount of intentionally obscured numbers.
Speaking of which! As soon as the post on r/AO3—and, as a result, my original tumblr post—began taking off properly, sometime around 1 pm, jumpscare! A notification that a tumblr account named @cliffweitzman had commented on my post, and I got a bit mad about the gist of his message :
Fortunately he caught plenty of flack in the comments from other users (truly you should check out the comment section, it is extremely gratifying and people are making tremendously good points), in response to which, of course, he first tried to both reiterate and renegotiate his point in a second, longer comment (which I didn’t screenshot in time so I’m sorry for the crappy notification email formatting):
which he then proceeded to also post to Reddit (this is another Reddit user’s screenshot, I didn’t see it at all, the notifications were moving too fast for me to follow by then)
... where he got a roughly equal amount of righteously furious replies. (Check downthread, they're still there, all the way at the bottom.)
After which Cliff went ahead & deleted his messages altogether.
It’s not entirely clear whether his account was suspended by Reddit soon after or whether he deleted it himself, but considering his tumblr account is still intact, I assume it’s the former. He made a handful of sock puppet accounts to play around with for a while, both on Reddit and Tumblr, only one of which I have a screenshot of, but since they all say roughly the same thing, you’re not missing much:
And then word-stream started throwing a DNS error.
That lasted for a good number of hours, which was unfortunately right around the time that a lot of authors first heard about the situation and started asking me individually how to find out whether their work was stolen too. I do not have that information and I am unclear on the perimeters Weitzman set for his AI scraper, so this is all conjecture: it LOOKS like the fics that were lifted had three things in common:
They were completed works;
They had over several thousand kudos on AO3; and
They were written by authors who had actively posted or updated work over the past year.
If anyone knows more about these perimeters or has info that counters my observation, please let me know!
I finally thought to check/alert evil Twitter during this time, and found out that the news was doing the rounds there already. I made a quick thread summarizing everything that had happened just in case. You can find it here.
I went to Bluesky too, where fandom was doing all the heavy lifting for me already, so I just reskeeted, as you do, and carried on.
Sometime in the very early evening, word-stream went back up—but the fan fiction category was nowhere to be seen. Tentative joy and celebration!***
That’s when several users—the ones who had signed up for accounts to gain intel and had accessed their own fics that way—reported that their work could still be accessed through their history. Relevant Reddit post here.
Sooo—
We’re obviously not done. The fanwork that was stolen by Weitzman may be inaccessible through his website right now, but they aren’t actually gone. And the fact that Weitzman wasn’t willing to get rid of them altogether means he still has plans for them.
This was my final edit on my Reddit post before turning off notifications, and it's pretty much where my head will be at for at least the foreseeable future:
Please feel free to add info in the comments, make your own posts, take whatever action you want to take to protect your work. I only beg you—seriously, I’m on my knees here—to not give up like I saw a handful of people express the urge to do. Keep sharing your creative work and remain vigilant and stay active to make sure we can continue to do so freely. Visit your favorite fics, and the ones you’ve kept in your ‘marked for later’ lists but never made time to read, and leave kudos, leave comments, support your fandom creatives, celebrate podficcers and support AO3. We created this place and it’s our responsibility to keep it alive and thriving for as long as we possibly can.
Also FUCK generative AI. It has NO place in fandom spaces.
THE 'SMALL' PRINT (some of it in all caps):
*Weitzman knew what he was doing and can NOT claim ignorance. One, it’s pretty basic kindergarten stuff that you don’t steal some other kid’s art project and present it as your own only to act surprised when they protest and then tell the victim that they should have told you sooner that they didn’t want their project stolen. And two, he was very careful never to list the IPs these fanworks were based on, so it’s clear he was at least familiar enough with the legalities to not get himself in hot water with corporate lawyers. Fucking over fans, though, he figured he could get away with that.
**A note about the AI that Weitzman used to steal our work: it’s even greasier than it looks at first glance. It’s not just the method he used to lift works off AO3 and then regurgitate onto his own website and app. Looking beyond the untold horrors of his AI-generated cover ‘art’, in many cases these covers attempt to depict something from the fics in question that can’t be gleaned from their summaries alone. In addition, my fics (and I assume the others, as well) were listed with generated genres; tags that did not appear anywhere in or on my fic on AO3 and were sometimes scarily accurate and sometimes way off the mark. I remember You & Me & Holiday Wine had ‘found family’ (100% correct, but not tagged by me as such) and I believe The Shape of Soup was listed as, among others, ‘enemies to friends to lovers’ and ‘love triangle’ (both wildly inaccurate). Even worse, not all the fic listed (as authors on Reddit pointed out) came with their original summaries at all. Often the entire summary was AI-generated. All of these things make it very clear that it was an all-encompassing scrape—not only were our fics stolen, they were also fed word-for-word into the AI Weitzman used and then analyzed to suit Weitzman’s needs. This means our work was literally fed to this AI to basically do with whatever its other users want, including (one assumes) text generation.
***Fan fiction appears to have been made (largely) inaccessible on word-stream at this time, but I’m hearing from several authors that their original, independently published work, which is listed at places like Kindle Unlimited, DOES still appear in word-stream’s search engine. This obviously hurts writers, especially independent ones, who depend on these works for income and, as a rule, don’t have a huge budget or a legal team with oceans of time to fight these battles for them. If you consider yourself an author in the broader sense, beyond merely existing online as a fandom author, beyond concerns that your own work is immediately at risk, DO NOT STOP MAKING NOISE ABOUT THIS.
Again, please, please PLEASE reblog this post instead of the one I sent originally. All the information is here, and it's driving me nuts to see the old ones are still passed around, sending people on wild goose chases.
Thank you all so much.
It doesn’t matter that Harry is gone. People die everyday. Friends. Family. Yeah, we lost Harry tonight but he’s still with us, in here! And so is Fred. Remus. Tonks. All of them.
[x]
it's always so fascinating and heartbreaking when a character in a story is simultaneously idolized and abused. a chosen prophet destined for martyrdom. a child prodigy forced to grow up too fast. a powerful warrior raised as nothing but a weapon. there's just something so uniquely messed up about singing someone's praises whilst destroying them.
Oii, como vai? Estamos de volta! Porém, com novidades.
Antes que vocês me perguntem, não, não vou largar a "NÃO HÁ LUGAR COMO O LAR", é só que... bem... por que ninguém me disse que os últimos capítulos estavam tão ruins? Tipo... precisou um leitor me dizer "isso está estranho", dá forma mais monossilábica que eu já vi para eu finalmente entender. Acho que isso aconteceu porque a história que eu estava escrevendo antes dessa estava bem pesada, então, a proposta dessa vez era ser algo leve, mas de tão leve, ficou bobo e não muito crível. Enfim, enquanto eu penso na melhor forma de concluir essa história, vou revisar "AMOR DE BABÁ (REFULGENTE)", exatamente a história que fez eu querer escrever algo leve e bobo. Vai entender.
O problema aqui é que quando eu estava escrevendo a AMOR DE BABÀ, escrevi em primeira pessoa. Não foi uma boa decisão, sabe? Ai, eu reescrevi as primeiras 50 mil palavras e ficou bem melhor. Outro problema é que eu ia monetizar ela, então, acabei mudando o nome dos personagens, ok? Vou colocar uma lista abaixo para simplificar quando os personagens forem surgindo. Ou você pode ler como uma original.
Espero que vocês gostem.
Nesse post colocarei os primeiros três capítulos.
Sinopse: Certo, ele disse a si mesmo. Nada pessoal. Claro. Não era nada de mais, apenas mais um emprego onde Matteo ficaria alguns meses, faria um pouco de dinheiro e seguiria para o próximo trabalho até que tivesse o suficiente para a faculdade. Ele deu alguns passos em direção a porta e subiu os poucos degraus, esses feitos de um mármore branco e cinza. Logo em seguida, tocou a campainha antes que seus nervos falassem mais alto. Impaciente e vencido pela ansiedade, Matteo tocou novamente a campainha, apertando o botão mais forte do que pretendia no exato momento em que a porta se abriu, revelando um homem alto de quase dois metros de altura, cabelos negros bagunçados e intensos olhos verdes que o fitavam com desinteresse. Certo, nada pessoal.
Matteo!Babá, Derek!Professor
Essa é uma história sobre um estudante que, para ter dinheiro na faculdade, se torna babá, conhecendo o pai das crianças e desenvolvendo um sentimento/tesão por ele. A partir daí as fantasias começam a surgir e tudo vai se complicando entre eles.
Personagens Percy Jackson: Derek Davis Moore Nico di Angelo: Matteo Rossi Pagano Annabeth Chase: Sofia Gray Jason Grace: Hazel Levesque: Will Solace: Diego Lewis Hades: Personagem original: Alice Gray Moore Personagem original: Logan Gray Moore
Lista a ser atualizada!
Também disponível em versões antigas no AO3 e no SpiritFanfic.
Aquele não era um dos melhores dias na vida de Matteo. De fato, não era a melhor semana, mês ou ano.
— Matteo. — O gerente do lugar onde trabalhava disse assim que o viu se aproximar da porta de entrada.
Esse era o momento que Matteo mais temia a cada manhã desde que começou a trabalhar naquele lugar.
Andrew McMillan se aproximou dele a passos despreocupados e parou em sua frente, o cumprimentando todo feliz e animado. O gerente tinha o cabelo penteado para trás, pele alva e olhos negros que sempre reviravam seu estômago. Matteo não poderia dizer que o homem era feito, porque de fato, ele era um dos homens mais bonitos que já tinha visto. Mas algo nele, por detrás daqueles olhos escuros e calculistas, o fazia repensar cada palavra que saia de sua boca, buscando o duplo sentido que sempre vinha, cedo ou tarde.
O gerente o olhou de cima a baixo, vitorioso, o fitando com maldade, olhos esses que faiscavam a cada segundo que se passava, em que nenhum dos dois dizia nada.
“É, era hoje”, Matteo pensou.
Seus ombros caíram e ele suspirou, conformado com seu destino. Andrew pareceu ficar ainda mais feliz enquanto anotava algo em sua prancheta. Sorrindo mais aberto ainda para ele, Andrew voltou a examinar Matteo como se ele fosse um espécime misterioso, o apreciando daquela forma que fazia Matteo se sentir desconfortável, algo que somente esse gerente conseguiu fazer em seus poucos anos de vida. E mesmo que fosse uma máscara, Matteo não deixaria Andrew saber como esses olhares o faziam querer vomitar, como sua ansiedade aumentava conforme eles continuavam parados no meio da calçada, principalmente por saber que ninguém viria em seu socorro.
Isso só poderia significar uma coisa.
— Senhor, posso explicar tudo. Eu--
— O ônibus atrasou? Ficou preso no trânsito? — Andrew balançou a cabeça, fingindo pesar e tocou em seu ombro, fazendo Matteo paralisar em repulsa, sentindo um medo que ele não sabia de onde vinha. — Dessa vez, não há nada que eu possa fazer por você.
— Por favor, eu preciso desse emprego!
— Estou do seu lado, mas você sabe as regras. Essa já é a quinta vez esse mês.
— Não tem nada que você possa fazer?
Matteo se arrependeu de perguntar assim que as palavras saíram de sua boca.
— Talvez haja, mas eu não sei… — Andrew cruzou os braços e se aproximou de Matteo, como se fosse contar um segredo a ele. — Isso requer um sacrifício. Você está disposto a isso?
— Ah. — Matteo murmurou, dando um passo para trás.
Não era a primeira vez que Andrew falava uma coisa dessas. A questão é que Matteo nunca havia levado a sério nenhuma dessas… sugestões, mas agora que ele estava ali, não sabia se iria querer continuar em lugar como aquele, mesmo que pudesse ou precisasse muito.
— Sinto muito, Matteo. — Andrew disse, sua voz soando piedosa e gentil, para logo em seguida acrescentar: — Não podemos nos esquecer de passar no RH, certo?
Matteo não sabia o que tinha mudado naquela manhã. Ele tinha acordado cedo, tomando banho, pegado sua mochila do encosto da porta de seu quarto e andado pelos corredores de sua casa silenciosamente para não acordar ninguém. Tinha pegado o ônibus lotado no mesmo horário e enfrentado uma hora de viagem até chegar ao seu emprego atual, um restaurante que dizia ser gourmet, mas que, na verdade, era uma imitação híbrida desses restaurantes de comida rápida; hambúrgueres, sanduíches, milkshakes e pizzas de todos os sabores. E como em todos os outros dias, ele havia descido do ônibus bem em cima da hora e corrido para o digníssimo estabelecimento em que trabalhava.
É claro que seu gerente o esperava na entrada, como todos os outros dias. Ele tinha espiado para dentro do lugar e viu que eles já haviam aberto todas as portas, limpando as mesas e colocado as cadeiras nos lugares, podendo ouvir o barulho das pessoas já trabalhando em seus postos.
Assim, meio confuso, porém, aceitando seu destino, Matteo seguiu Andrew pelo restaurante naquela estranha caminhada da vergonha. Não seria a primeira vez que algo assim aconteceria, o rodízio de trabalhadores sendo bem grande por ali. Ainda assim, a maioria das pessoas o olharam com sorrisinhos tão maldosos quanto o de Andrew, e os outros, que o encaravam com uma pena sincera, ele sentiria falta. Tirando isso, todo o resto podia se explodir se dependesse dele.
Matteo levantou a cabeça, segurou firme em sua bolsa e foi para os fundos do restaurante onde ficava a contabilidade. Ele podia estar indo embora, mas Andrew se arrependeria por abusar de seu poder.
***
— Cara, eu não acredito que você fez isso! Meu pequeno herói. — Diego disse, abrindo um sorriso enorme.
Matteo não sabia por quanto tempo aguentaria isso.
Diego olhou para ele de cima a baixo e o abraçou bem forte depois de apertar suas bochechas até que elas adormeceram de tão doloridas, o jeito do namorado se tornando tão energético que Matteo pensou que elas fossem se distender e cair no chão flácidas. Um beijo veio em seguida, doce e suave em seu rosto, outro no queixo, descendo devagar com aquelas pequenas bitoquinhas que só serviam para deixá-lo mais irritado.
— Diego, para com isso! E eu não sou pequeno. Como um metro e setenta e nove pode ser pequeno?
Matteo fechou os olhos por um momento e inspirou profundamente, ele apenas precisava respirar.
Geralmente não se importaria de Diego estar tão perto, até gostava quando Diego lhe tocava daquela maneira um pouco sexual demais, porém, nada que ultrapasse o que ele se sentia confortável em fazer. Hoje não era um desses dias; hoje essas carícias suaves o sufocavam, lhe fazendo sentir preso dentro de uma caixa que não havia escapatória ou buracos onde o ar pudesse entrar. Diego o asfixiava, o estrangulando naquele cuidado que o namorado insistia em oferecer quando Matteo não havia pedido por isso.
Ele respirou fundo e desviou dos lábios de Diego, o empurrando pelo ombro. Deu uma mochilada em Diego, seguido de um soco no ombro do namorado. Sim, Diego, seu namorado corpulento e idiota apenas riu, o rosto quadrado e gentil lhe irritando um pouco mais a cada segundo. Se não bastasse ter passado duas horas na delegacia e ser questionado como se fosse ele quem tivesse cometido o crime, teve que ficar uma hora extra no escritório do RH negando os “bônus” e “benefícios” em troca de “confidencialidade”. Um tempo depois, quando foi liberado do interrogatório, Sr. Jones, dono daquela franquia, fez de tudo para que ele não prestasse queixa, ainda mais quando viu que as câmeras que ficavam na porta do restaurante haviam gravado tudo em áudio e vídeo, tendo provas suficientes para acusar o gerente de abuso de poder e assédio sexual.
Sinceramente? Matteo sabia que não daria em nada e que o processo demoraria para ser julgado e, ao mesmo tempo, sabia que tinha que fazer aquilo; todas aquelas tardes tendo que ouvir as piadinhas que, no fundo, eram sinceras demais, precisavam ser denunciadas. Sem perder tempo e se sentindo muito vingado, Matteo fez a única coisa que podia, pegou o celular e fez a denúncia. Logo viaturas bloquearam a frente do estabelecimento e os empregados foram dispensados, enquanto que o Sr. Jones e companhia foram processados por danos morais e abuso de poder. Agora, se ele ganharia o caso era algo a se ver no futuro quando a decisão judicial fosse tomada.
O problema real apareceu quando Matteo foi solto do interrogatório. Sem dinheiro para o almoço e com a passagem do ônibus contada, decidiu que continuar com seu dia como se nada tivesse acontecido era a melhor das táticas. Se arrastando pelas ruas ao sair da delegacia, Matteo caminhou as poucas quadras se forçando a visitar Diego no centro comunitário, exatamente como ele sempre fazia naquela hora do dia; Matteo se encontraria com Diego na hora do almoço, o único momento onde Diego estava livre para falar com ele e depois iria para casa procurar por outro emprego até que tivesse o suficiente para pagar os custos da faculdade.
Matteo virou a esquina e continuou seu caminho, distraído e tão chateado pelas últimas horas que mal percebeu o que acontecia. Quando viu, mãos lhe puxaram pelas costas e o arrastaram para um beco ali perto enquanto alguém o prensava contra a parede e uma boca se colocava sobre a dele sem sua permissão. E de tão aflito só percebeu que era Diego quando deu um soco no estômago dele e um chute bem-dado em sua virilha.
— Diego Lewis! — Matteo arfou surpreso, irritado, enfurecido. Embora Matteo admitisse que estava um pouco traumatizado com toda aquela experiência, aquele não era o momento ou o lugar certo para fazer esse tipo de coisa. Também admitia que não estava no seu melhor momento, Matteo poderia matar alguém se lhe dessem a motivação certa.
Diego não pareceu ligar para o que ele falava. Gemendo ofegante, Diego se aproximou de Matteo e o segurou pela cintura, falando: — Isso não se faz com um homem, baixinho.
Então, dessa vez, se sentindo culpado e um pouco temeroso pelo que Diego poderia fazer, ou pior, temendo que Diego dissesse algo para seu pai, Matteo deixou que Diego continuasse. Diego o levantou um pouco do chão e ele automaticamente enrolou os braços e pernas ao redor de Diego.
Diego… ele… Diego não gostava de ser contrariado, sabe? Se as coisas não saíssem exatamente como Diego queria, algo podia explodir ou ser lançado pelos ares. Matteo preferia evitar esse tipo de discussão. Ou outros tipos de reações. Não seria a primeira vez que eles brigariam pela ausência de sexo ou pela ausência de Matteo no geral. Ele não estava pronto e Diego estava. Ele não queria se casar e Diego já tinha comprado as alianças. Matteo definitivamente não queria morar junto com ele enquanto Diego tinha comprado uma casa com direito a berçário e tudo mais o que eles poderiam precisar na visão deturpada de Diego. Matteo nem sabia se queria esse tipo de responsabilidade, mas, ainda assim, esse era ele fazendo uma forcinha pelos pais e por todos os outros que pensavam que logo o casório aconteceria. E talvez… só talvez… não fosse tão ruim assim ter um namorado bonito e gostoso que estava disposto a ficar com alguém tão chato e… antiquado feito ele. Apesar de saber dos erros de Diego, ignorando as pessoas que Diego ficava por trás de suas costas, ele não se importava contanto que todos continuassem satisfeitos.
Matteo ficava se perguntando… quem é que namorava por três anos e não queria fazer sexo? Ou não se importava com traições?
Ele não conseguia explicar, havia algo nisso tudo… algo entre eles que não parecia… certo. Quer dizer, o problema deveria ser ele, não? Diego lhe traía porque ele não conseguia dar aquele último passo, não importava quantas vezes Diego tentasse; Matteo sempre desistia no momento final. Apenas parecia… errado, como se Matteo estivesse prestes a cometer o maior erro de sua vida.
Matteo sentiu um arrepio estranho e incômodo subir por sua coluna quando Diego o segurou com mais força do que o costume e o puxou firme pelos cabelos, sussurrando em seu ouvido:
— Senti tanto a sua falta, baixinho. Onde você esteve que não atendeu o celular?
Ah, talvez ele não estivesse tão desconfortável assim… quer dizer, Diego era sempre gentil demais, sabe? Tão cuidadoso, e esse cuidado todo fazia com que Matteo se sentisse um fraco, como se ele fosse quebrar em mil pedaços a qualquer momento, e Matteo não gostava disso nenhum pouco. Mas quando Diego perdia o controle? O tocando com força e com vontade, sem medo de lhe machucar como se, na verdade, ele quisesse o ferir, mas só um pouquinho, apenas para deixar uma marca nele, exatamente como Diego fazia agora…? Era outra história. Era nessas horas que Matteo diria sim se Diego lhe pedisse. O fato era que se Diego tinha que se forçar a ser bonzinho para tratá-lo bem… Matteo não queria viver com alguém que no fundo fingia ser algo que não era. Não importava o motivo.
— Você está me escutando? — Matteo ouviu novamente uma voz suave ao pé de seu ouvido. Ele se sentiu arrepiar e desistiu de tentar raciocinar.
Matteo queria dizer que não fez de propósito. Ele queria ter respondido à mensagem e as ligações de Diego e mesmo que ele quisesse ter contado tudo o que tinha acontecido imediatamente, não teria conseguido, estava no meio de um interrogatório policial; não que a resposta para isso parecesse ser importante no momento, não para Diego. Ele voltou a beijar Matteo como se esse fosse o único objetivo de sua vida e todo o ar ou pensamentos fugiram para fora da cabeça de ambos.
Aquilo… aquilo era tão errado, bem no meio da rua onde qualquer um que passasse poderia vê-los… Matteo se remexeu e tentou falar, sentindo o ar abandonar seu corpo, desconfortável por outra razão. Bem, talvez ele tenha gemido baixinho, Matteo não saberia dizer, tentado se afastar de Diego só para ser puxado de volta contra sua vontade.
— Qual é o problema? — Diego disse entre suspiros e mordiscadas, a língua dele voltando para dentro da boca de Matteo, massageando a sua e se movendo daquela forma que Matteo mais gostava, o fazendo relaxar mais um pouco, apenas o suficiente para Diego abaixar o zíper das suas calças.
E de novo, ele não tinha o direito de escolha. Diego enfiou os dedos dentro de sua cueca, o fazendo arfar. Entretanto, esse foi o momento onde Matteo ouviu algo, um som estridente que o fez abrir os olhos e perceber o que estavam fazendo. Matteo então desviou a boca dos lábios de Diego, o empurrou pelos ombros e colocou as pernas no chão enquanto fechava o zíper das próprias calças, procurando pelo celular que tocava. Ele definitivamente deveria ter ido para casa em vez de ir até ali há duas quadras do centro comunitário onde crianças e adolescentes vinham em busca de ajuda.
Bem, costumes eram difíceis de serem quebrados.
Matteo enfim se abaixou, abriu o zíper da mochila e encontrou o maldito celular que estava no fundo de um bolso estreito.
— Matteo Rossi? Temos uma vaga para você. — Alguém falou imediatamente, mal lhe deixando atender a ligação.
Era Caren da agência de empregos, sua voz seca e mal-humorada podia ser reconhecida em qualquer lugar. Mal-educada e rude, soava aguda a seus ouvidos.
— Claro. Sobre o que seria?
— Cuidar de duas crianças durante o dia. Com horas extras e direitos trabalhistas.
Com toda certeza seria melhor do que o último emprego. Nisso Matteo podia confiar.
— Pra quando?
— Amanhã às 7h.
— Tudo bem. Devo usar uniforme?
— Não, apenas apareça no horário.
Assim, o telefone foi desligado na cara dele e Diego que estava a seu lado encostado na parede riu, o tocando no rosto e lhe beijando agora suavemente.
— Parece que nossa diversão acabou.
— Você não viu nada. Sabe o que aconteceu hoje? — Diego levantou as sobrancelhas e se inclinou em direção a Matteo, curioso, o que lhe deixou muito aliviado. Ele amava Diego, mas não estava no clima para beijo nenhum.
Matteo desceu do ônibus e parou em frente a um grupo de casas luxuosas, já estranhando o lugar. Ele segurou o celular com força e verificou o endereço que lhe mandaram. Sim, era ali, Rua dos pinheiros… eh… o que parecia estar certo, havia árvores tão altas que pareciam desaparecer entre as nuvens. Ele deu de ombros e andou pela calçada larga, sentindo como se entrasse em um mundo desconhecido ao ver que os tijolos no chão eram pintados de uma cor amarela num tom dourado e fosforescente, se estendendo sem fim por longos quilômetros que mais parecia sair de um conto de fadas conforme as fileiras de residências se perdiam ao horizonte e além.
Ele não podia evitar, se via deslumbrado por aquele lugar; eram os grandes portões que delimitavam as propriedades, as separando por muros ainda mais altos. Árvores gigantes e canteiros menores com flores em diferentes formatos e cores que bloqueavam a visão das outras casas ou do que havia dentro daqueles portões.
Ele continuou andando e parou em frente ao conjunto que tinha o número 17, onde mais um grande portão de ferro negro subia mais alto do que ele podia ver. Matteo não conseguia expressar como era estranho estar num lugar como aquele, o ambiente era tão quieto e a ausência de qualquer pessoa por ali fazia sua pele se arrepiar. E só para ter certeza, ele verificou mais uma vez se aquele era o endereço correto. Matteo coçou os cabelos, tentado a abrir mais uma vez o e-mail com os dados do contratante, porque aquilo só podia ser um engano; o que ele presenciava não podia ser chamado de casa. Agora que chegava bem perto dos portões, podia ver que era um conjunto de pequenas mansões bonitas e bem estruturadas. Cercas brancas, largos jardins, parques, piscinas, academias e tudo mais o que pudesse ser imaginado, além de seguranças que protegiam o perímetro ao redor da propriedade e nas áreas comuns a todos os moradores.
Parecia que ele de fato tinha entrado em uma realidade paralela, o que era estranho. Matteo sentia que ele não era alguém que aquelas pessoas contratariam para trabalhar ali, alguém sem faculdade, sem qualificações ou indicações profissionais adequadas. Mas já que Matteo estava ali… ele deu de ombros outra vez. Que mal tinha em tentar?
Ele andou até a frente do portão e apertou o interfone:
— Com licença, sou Matteo Rossi. Tenho uma reunião com Sofia Gray na casa 4.
— Sim, bom dia. A Senhorita Gray deixou um recado. — O porteiro solicito e educado, lhe disse. — Ela pede desculpas por não poder recebê-lo pessoalmente. Nós o encaminharemos até o local.
Restou a Matteo agradecer e esperar que os portões se abrissem.
Ele jurava que estava tentando manter a mente aberta, porém, a coisa mais esquisita aconteceu em seguida. Enquanto parte do portão deslizava para o lado, dois seguranças com o triplo do seu tamanho o olharam de cima a baixo e pararam em sua frente.
— Documentos. São regras do condomínio. — Matteo achou mais estranho ainda, mas tudo bem. Já que ele tinha embarcado nessa loucura, iria até o fim.
Ele abriu o zíper da mochila e entregou a eles sua carteira de habilitação. O mais alto e ruivo pegou o documento de suas mãos e tirou uma prancheta de dentro do posto da guarita, se aproximou, olhou para as informações que tinha e depois pareceu comparar com as informações do documento.
O mesmo guarda-costas escreveu alguma coisa no papel e entregou o documento e a prancheta para ele, dizendo: — Assine aqui. — Foi tudo o que o ruivo lhe disse antes de Matteo assinar rapidamente e o segurança conferir a assinatura. Quando as informações pareceram bater, o outro segurança que estava ao lado acenou e o guiou até um carro que o esperava em frente a outro portão menor.
Matteo se deixou ser encaminhado até o próximo portão e sentiu vontade de rir; primeiro, esse era algum tipo de prisão luxuosa? E em segundo, por que havia um carrinho de mini golfe ali? O mais interessante era que o carinho até vinha com um motorista particular.
Ainda achando graça, ele entrou no carro, colocou o cinto de segurança e se deparou com um garoto da idade dele, algo entre vinte e vinte e cinco anos, cabelos castanhos, olhos negros e um bonito sorriso largo.
— Primeira vez?
Ele acenou, tentando não demonstrar como tudo aquilo o incomodava e o divertia ao mesmo tempo.
— Não se preocupe, todo mundo fica meio assustado na primeira vez. Qual o seu nome?
— Matteo.
— É um prazer, Matteo. Você pode me chamar de Gabe. Vou te dar uma carona pelo tempo que você ficar por aqui.
— Por quê? Você acha que eu não vou ficar muito tempo?
— Ninguém fica. Não é nada pessoal. Você sabe como são essas pessoas.
— Como elas são?
— Acho que você vai descobrir, não vai?
Assim, quando ele menos percebeu, Gabe parou o carro em frente a casa de número 4.
Sorrindo todo charmoso com covinhas e dentes brancos, Gabe perguntou: — Eu posso? — E antes que Matteo pudesse responder, Gabe o ajudou a tirar o cinto de segurança, deu a volta no carro e estendeu a mão para ele.
Por um motivo que Matteo não compreendia, sentiu uma quentura subir por seu pescoço até encontrar suas maçãs do rosto, um sorriso se formando em seus lábios quando a mão de Gabe tocou na sua e mais envergonhado ainda, ele aceitou a ajuda oferecida.
Matteo desceu do carro e Gabe que estava perto dele o puxou suavemente por um momento, os deixando mais perto ainda, Matteo quase podendo sentir a respiração de Gabe contra seu rosto. Ele observou a forma que Gabe parecia querer se aproximar o resto da distância e pigarreou, enfim dando um passo para trás em direção a casa. Matteo encarou uma última vez os olhos negros de seu mais novo amigo que pareciam brilhar quase maliciosos ao encará-lo e viu o tal sorriso se alargar por algum motivo que Matteo não entendia.
— Não se esqueça, não leve para o lado pessoal. — Ele piscou para Matteo, todo charmoso e deu a volta no carro, entrando no lugar do motorista.
“Certo. Nada pessoal. Claro.” Matteo pensou consigo mesmo, vendo Gabe se afastar rapidamente pelas ruas do condomínio, arrancando para longe dali.
Ele se permitiu respirar fundo e encarou a casa de dois andares que era rodeada por um jardim tão extenso que não era possível ver nada além da natureza, alguns carros e mais árvores que cresciam altas com folhagens volumosas. Não restava para Matteo nada além de tentar ignorar a exuberância do lugar, dizendo a si próprio, não era nada demais; esse seria apenas mais um emprego onde ele ficaria alguns meses, faria um pouco de dinheiro e seguiria para o próximo trabalho até que tivesse dinheiro o suficiente para custear seus estudos. Apenas mais um dentre tantos outros.
Ele deu mais alguns passos em direção à porta e subiu os poucos degraus, esses feitos de um mármore branco e cinza, seguindo o resto do design da casa; tudo muito pálido e em tons pastéis, isso ficando claro até mesmo do lado de fora da casa. Em seguida, tocou a campainha antes que seus nervos falassem mais alto, restando a Matteo respirar fundo mais uma vez, tentando se acalmar. Ele arrumou suas roupas amassadas e segurou na alça da mochila passando a mão nos cabelos, tentando ajeitá-los no reflexo da tela do celular, o que se provou ser inútil. Não havia milagre naquele mundo que o faria se sentir adequado ou bem-vestido, assim, ele se forçou a esperar o mais paciente que alguém como ele poderia.
Não era nada demais, disse a si mesmo mais uma vez. Ele sempre ficava nervoso no primeiro dia e isso nem tinha a ver com os chefes insuportáveis ou abusivos que Matteo já teve o prazer de aturar, não, tudo isso estava impregnado em sua pele não importando para onde ele fosse. Fazia parte de sua condição psicológica.
Impaciente e vencido pela ansiedade, ele tocou novamente a campainha, apertando o botão mais forte do que pretendia no exato momento em que a porta se abriu bruscamente, revelando um homem alto de quase dois metros de altura, cabelos negros bagunçados e intensos olhos verdes que o fitavam com desinteresse. O homem parecia ter pulado para fora da cama, vestindo apenas calças de moletom cinza e mostrando… mostrando uma trilha de pelos que levava a um certo volume avantajado naquele lugar.
— Sim? — O homem murmurou rouco, seus olhos mal se abrindo e tão sério que Matteo pensou em dar meia volta e escapar daquela situação estranha.
Se sentindo pior ainda, como se alguém revirasse suas entranhas, Matteo manteve seus olhos acima dos ombros do homem seminu e conferiu o celular, verificando novamente o e-mail que a agência tinha enviado.
Casa 4. Empregadora - Sofia Grey.
— Posso falar com a senhora Sofia Grey ?
— Volte no próximo mês. Talvez no próximo ano, sim? Nunca pensei que ela gostasse dos mais novos… — O homem murmurou quietamente como se Matteo não devesse ter escutado, principalmente a última parte, distraído, nem parecendo se importar com a presença dele.
— Senhor…?
— Moore, Derek Moore. — Ele disse de má vontade, bocejando.
— Sr. Moore. — Matteo falou. Ele fez questão de ignorar o que aquele senhor insinuava. — Me avisaram sobre a vaga de cuidador infantil. A agência me enviou aqui.
— Ah.
Derek Moore não agiu como ele esperava. Não, o homem apenas levantou as sobrancelhas e o encarou pela primeira vez parecendo lhe analisar, o dissecando com seus analíticos e intensos olhos verdes, como se tentasse decidir se Matteo valia o seu tempo. O que fez Matteo se sentir ainda mais estranho, querendo se esconder e socar a cara daquele homem ao mesmo tempo.
— Você tem experiência com crianças? — Derek Moore lhe disse, mesmo que não fosse o que o homem pretendia falar. Isso estava nítido para Matteo.
— Cuido dos meus irmãos desde criança. Serve? — Quando Matteo viu que parecia desrespeitoso demais, completou: — O anúncio não exigia especificações.
— Me deixe ver.
Não parecia ter sido um pedido.
— Claro. — Ele deu de ombros, fingindo não se importar com aquele interrogatório todo.
Matteo entregou o celular para o Sr. Moore e se sentiu vitorioso quando o homem não achou nada de errado. Sr. Moore apenas pareceu ler, virou a cabeça para o lado e suspirou fundo, dizendo: — Típico dela.
— Se o senhor quiser posso ir embora. — Afinal, nenhum dinheiro era suficiente para passar aquele tipo de humilhação. Ou o que ainda estava por vir. Matteo nunca tinha certeza do que poderia acontecer.
— A culpa não é sua. Entre.
Sr. Moore deu espaço para que Matteo entrasse e assim a porta se fechou, dando início a algo que ele em hipótese alguma poderia ter previsto.
— A culpa não é sua. Entre.
Sr. Moore deu espaço para Matteo entrar e fechou a porta, logo em seguida caminhou para dentro da casa, o guiando pela câmara de entrada.
Matteo tentou seguir pelo cômodo na velocidade do homem, mas teve que parar por um momento. A primeira coisa que viu foi o branco em seu tom mais puro, vendo que conforme ele andava e seus olhos percorriam o saguão, o branco se misturava a outras tonalidades mais claras e neutras. Ele piscou, olhando ao redor e se perguntou o que mais iria encontrar naquele lugar. As paredes eram brancas e os móveis de uma cor clara, neve pálida, que contrastavam com os quadros bonitos no qual ele nunca poderia reconhecer seu real valor mesmo que o pagassem, decoravam tais paredes intercaladas por grandes janelas que iam até o chão em pontos estratégicos; tudo era tão imaculado, tão limpo e claro que ele teve medo de dar um passo à frente e sujar alguma coisa. Por isso, com o maior cuidado possível, Matteo pisou no tapete branquíssimo que se estendia por toda a entrada e andou o mais rápido que pôde tentando alcançar Sr. Moore que já lhe esperava na entrada para a sala de estar, parecendo impaciente.
E como todo o resto, o chão daquela casa também era de um granito branco que reluzia quase lhe cegando. Ele tinha mencionado a grande escada em caracol que levava ao andar de cima? Era lindo, algo saído de algum conto de fadas. Matteo podia muito bem imaginar uma princesa descendo por aqueles degraus claros e lustrados. Ele escutou um pigarro e enfim desviou o olhar da escada vendo que havia duas portas à direita e uma a esquerda, e o cômodo que ele pensava ser uma pequena sala de estar se abriu ampla mais à direita, bem iluminada pelas grandes janelas que também havia ali mostrando o jardim bem cuidado, com mais paredes brancas, sofás creme, uma mesinha de centro e uma televisão de setenta polegadas presa a parede.
Feito um idiota, ele continuou andando enquanto olhava para os lados e sem querer tropeçou no fim do tapete, parando no início da sala de estar. Já o Sr. Moore, tinha andado a passos confiantes pelo longo corredor, lhe esperando, parecendo a cada minuto mais impaciente agora parado no meio da sala.
— Entre. Por favor. — Sr. Moore lhe disse tão sério quanto antes.
Por algum motivo que Matteo não podia explicar, ele se sentia em conflito, embora… embora soubesse ser um tipo diferente de conflito. Era uma sensação engraçada no pé do estômago que fazia os pelos em sua nuca se arrepiarem, como se… podia parecer ridículo, mas ele sentia ter entrado em uma armadilha de forma que se pisasse em falso seria devorado. Ele admitia, tinha atração por um tipo específico de homem. Alto, forte e… decidido.
Bem, ele não sabia se “decidido” era a palavra certa, mas Matteo gostava de acreditar nisso. Ele não sabia, talvez fosse toda aquela pele à mostra, a forma que o homem seminu estava parado no meio do cômodo como se não tivesse nada a esconder, a forma que Sr. Moore parecia usar sua altura para exigir… exigir algo dele. Também era o jeito que aqueles olhos que brilhavam intensos pareciam o espreitar, contidos, atentos, tentando comunicar algo que Matteo se negava em compreender.
Também poderia ser aquele lugar gigante e deserto que lhe dava essa impressão de sufocamento, como se ele fosse minúsculo e a vastidão branca fosse engoli-lo naquela casa que parecia ser a perfeita prisão feita de ouro. Ou ainda pior, poderia ser algo inédito, algo que Matteo recusaria até o fim por puro senso de moral; ele odiava essa sensação que subia por sua coluna e lhe deixava mais confuso, pois, não era justo, ele estava irritado com o homem há menos de dez minutos e agora, bem… Matteo não podia esconder, era algo que vinha a ele naturalmente; essa sexualidade que tentava enterrar o máximo que pudesse e que era óbvio se ele pudesse comparar, era a semelhança na postura desse homem que o encarava dos pés à cabeça tão intensamente que lhe deixava desconfortável e ao mesmo tempo com vontade.
Mas tudo estava bem, Matteo podia admitir isso para si mesmo. O único motivo de hesitar tanto era a lembrança do que havia acontecido ontem, era exatamente por conhecer pessoas como esse homem, autoritário e confiante, como se fosse óbvio que os outros viviam para atender seus desejos, que ele tinha perdido o emprego. Matteo não queria que acontecesse a mesma coisa tão rápido. Ou que acontecesse algo pior.
Ah, por que ele não escutou sua intuição e foi embora quando pôde? Quer dizer… ninguém o obrigava a estar ali, certo? Sr. Moore apenas tinha segurado a porta, lhe dando passagem e andado para dentro da casa. Talvez um pouco com a cabeça empinada? Talvez se colocando mais ereto do que antes como se… como se estivesse estufando o peito? E só talvez… só talvez ele pudesse ver um brilho meio sinistro naqueles olhos que por algum motivo Matteo não conseguia desviar a atenção… Não, devia ser coisa da ansiedade que gostava de lhe pregar peças.
Matteo respirou fundo e fez o seu melhor para se convencer, ele fazia esse sacrifício apenas pelo dinheiro.
Inspirou profundamente, mais uma vez, e deixou o ar sair, dando o primeiro passo para dentro da sala. Depois deu mais um e parou na frente do Sr. Moore que o encarou por mais uns segundos, seu rosto ilegível, braços cruzados em frente ao peito, parado no meio do cômodo com as pernas afastadas. Era difícil impedir seus olhos de seguir a direção natural das coisas.
— Me siga.
Sem esperar por Matteo, Sr. Moore andou a passos largos em direção aos sofás na sala de estar e se sentou pesadamente contra uma das milhares de poltronas que enfeitavam o cômodo, o forçando a ir atrás dele.
— Não vou enrolar. Minha esposa viaja a maior parte do tempo e eu cuido das crianças. Sou pesquisador e não tenho tempo a perder. Elas têm uma rotina. Você deve acordá-la às sete em ponto, trocar elas, me ajudar com o café da manhã, levá-las para a escola, buscá-las, ajudá-las com o dever de casa, mantê-las entretidas até a hora de ir dormir e dar banho nelas no fim do dia. Durante o resto do tempo, eu não me importo com o que você faz. Se você fica aqui ou em outro lugar, não é da minha conta.
— Hmm… tudo bem? — Matteo disse meio confuso, a irritação voltando a subir por seus nervos. — O senhor vai estar presente em algum momento? Ou devo fazer alguma coisa a mais?
— E o que seria isso?
O homem finalmente sorriu para Matteo, mas era algo tão zombador e cínico que ele quase se levantou da cadeira para dar um soco nele.
— Olha, eu não sei o que você faz na casa das outras pessoas, mas aqui você vai fazer o que foi contratado para fazer. Cuidar das crianças e arrumar a bagunça que elas fizerem. Duzentos reais por dia é o suficiente?
— Duzentos reais? — Matteo disse, surpreso. Isso era o dobro do que ele esperava.
— Duzentos reais mais transporte e almoço. Você está livre para comer ou fazer o que quiser.
Sr. Moore deu mais um sorrisinho na direção de Matteo e se espreguiçou lentamente ao se levantar, Matteo observando cada movimento com mais atenção do que o necessário, ainda levemente confuso e se negando a corar. O pior era saber que ele era tão óbvio, não conseguindo evitar o constrangimento.
— Não se preocupe. Acontece com todo mundo. — Sr. Moore piscou para Matteo e enfim se afastou, mas não sem antes falar: — Subindo as escadas, estou no primeiro quarto à direita. As crianças devem ser acordadas em vinte minutos.
Matteo acenou meio zonzo e viu a silhueta dos ombros largos de seu mais novo chefe desaparecer escadas acima.
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Espero que vocês tenham gostado, vou adorar receber um feedback sincero, mas sem pressão. Ficou confuso? Lento demais?
Obrigada por ler!
i wish you guys could read the amazing fic i haven't written and probably will never write, it's fire
Enemies to lovers comrades (also: comrades to lovers)
Coffeeshop Employee owned and operated co-op AU
Alpha/Beta/Omega Autocrat/Bourgeois/Oligarch dynamics (dystopia)
Fake dating comrades AU
Hurt/Comfort Free Healthcare
Mpreg with federally mandated parental leave
Soul Unionmates AU
And there was only one bed copy of the Communist Manifesto
Accidental baby government subsidy acquisition
Mutual pining aid
Free college AU
Fix-it with public funds fic
Fuck Tax the rich or die
Huddling for warmth resource conservation
Didn’t know they were dating benefiting from public resources
Prison abolition AU
Sejam bem-vindos! Olá, esse é meu blog pessoal. Escrevo fanfics Pernico/Nicercy e orginais, e reblogo alguns posts de vez em quando. História Atual Não há lugar como o Lar - versão em Portugues There's no Place like home - English version Resumo: Nico está voltando da Itália depois de passar dois anos por lá e encontra Percy, o melhor amigo que ele deixou para trás, mas que manteve contato nesse tempo afastado. O resto se desenvolve a partir desse reencontro. Se você quiser saber o que eu escrevo, siga a tag #my writing
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